Category: Humor (Page 40 of 74)

Adam Carolla, Joel McHale to star in pilots

Los Angeles radio station 97.1 switched from an all-talk format to top 40, so Adam Corolla (who replaced Howard Stern when he moved to Sirius) was out of a job. It turns out that his unemployment only lasted about a day…

Carolla will star in CBS’ pilot Ace in the Hole as a family man who works days as a driving instructor, reports Variety. He’s re-teaming with former Man Show writer Kevin Hench on the comedy.

Joel McHale (right, host of “The Soup”) also looks to get into the sitcom game…

After being pursued by networks for some time now, McHale has finally settled on a project. He’ll star in Community, a comedy pilot over at NBC, as a lawyer who goes to community college after learning he needs more credits for a real college degree, according to The Hollywood Reporter.

As host of E!’s The Soup, McHale–a favorite around these parts–had been courted by networks as a talk-show host but instead was looking for an acting gig. If this works out, E! will have a heck of a time finding a replacement.

I’ve been watching “The Soup” for a while now, and there’s no doubt that McHale has talent. I understand the networks’ desire to give him a talk show, but he may use that as a backup plan if he can’t make it as an actor. The premise of the show — a lawyer who has to return to community college — does show some promise.

The ultimate Oscar acceptance speech, by Denis Leary

Variety has the best acceptance speech…ever…as written by “Rescue Me” star Denis Leary. (Keep in mind this is from the POV of an actress, not an actor.)

Okay. First of all — I’d like to thank God for just taking time out of His busy schedule curing cancer and feeding the hungry and solving the crisis in Darfur with George Clooney and helping so many different wide receivers and quarterbacks to throw and catch footballs and instead making sure that I got singled out of such a wonderful group of actors like Meryl and Mary-Louise and Cate Blanchett and Angelina and Marcia Gay and Kate Winslet and just – all the Kates and the Kevins and the two name and the three name people I feel so honored just to be up here while they are all down there and I’d like to just thank the Academy and the people who hated me and treated me like such dirt and who made me stab them in the back just to get here and now you can suck it and Botox! I almost forgot Botox! And Restylin and Cosmoderm and Prestocheek and Instatit and all the other animal agents I’ve had injected into my face and stuff. Oh my god my agents — I almost forgot the entire squad of agents and managers and hangers-on whose asses I have kissed and coddled for so many long B and C movie years now and also — it would be so bad not to thank my team of surgeons who have stretched and sculpted and pulled and pressure-pointed every aspect of my face, neck and armfat until I look so young and ripe and yet somehow still able to move my forehead and eyebrows just enough to frown and laugh and look focused which is a huge part of why I just won this!

And that’s just about a third of it…

The Final Fate of the Masturbating Bear

It’s been well-documented that, when Conan O’Brien departs the less-stringent 12:30 AM timeslot in favor of replacing Jay Leno on “The Tonight Show,” he will not be taking one of his most renown characters with him: the Masturbating Bear. It’s a shame, but it’s not a big surprise, either. (Can you imagine the number of heart attacks the great beast would cause in middle America if he were to go through his trademark schtick at 11:30 PM?) Fortunately, however, Conan gave the forest’s most famous knuckle shuffler the heave-ho with dignity…and with no less than two Harrison Ford homages, plus a very special guest star.

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