Will is a member of the Television Critics Association and has written for Decider.com, the Onion A.V. Club, The Dissolve, Indiewire, Rhino.com, TV Week Magazine, The Virginian-Pilot, Popdose.com, and EW.com along with writing for Bullz-Eye.com and Premium Hollywood.
And Upfronts Week rolls on, with the American Broadcasting Company offering up their slate for the new season. Sadly, as Mr. Paulsen revealed yesterday, “Samantha Who?” will not be returning for Season 3 (and that rather depresses me, as I quite liked the show), but on the up side, “Better Off Ted” did score another season. Woo-hoo! You can view the network’s fall schedule below, along with info on the new shows and details on what to expect come the mid-season.
Monday:
8:00 PM – Dancing with the Stars 10:00 PM – Castle
Tuesday:
8:00 PM – Shark Tank
From Mark Burnett, executive producer of “Survivor” and “The Apprentice,” and Sony Pictures Television comes “Shark Tank,” an exciting new reality show that gives budding entrepreneurs the chance to make their dreams come true and become successful – and possibly wealthy – business people. But the entrepreneurs must first try to convince five tough, multi-millionaire tycoons to part with their own hard-earned cash and give them the funding they need to jumpstart their ideas.
9:00 PM – Dancing with the Stars Results Show
10:00 PM – The Forgotten
From executive producer Jerry Bruckheimer comes a crime show in which a team of dedicated amateurs work on cases involving unidentified victims. After the police have given up, this group must first solve the puzzle of the victim’s identity in order to then help catch the killer. They work to give the deceased back their names, lest they become — The Forgotten. Stars Rupert Penry-Jones as Alex, Reiko Aylesworth as Linda, Michelle Borth as Candace, Bob Stephenson as Walter, Anthony Carrigan as Tyler and Rochelle Aytes as Detective Grace Russell.
Fox has officially announced its schedule for the fall, but let’s lead with a bit of bad news: “Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles” is not on it. The network officially canceled the series, and while I’m still dumbfounded by that decision, you know they’ll double-back and find a way to get it back onto the schedule if “Terminator: Salvation” is a hit. Or maybe they’ll release a straight-to-DVD movie which picks up where the series ends. Either way, I just cannot imagine that this will be the complete and total end of Sarah Connor’s TV adventures.
Okay, onto what is on the schedule, along with a few editorial comments…
MONDAY
8:00 PM – House 9:00 PM – LIE TO ME
Looks like another year of having to watch “House” and “Lie To Me” as full-season sets when they come out on DVD, because I’m still going to be watching “The Big Bang Theory,” “How I Met Your Mother,” and “Heroes.”
TUESDAY
8:00 PM – So You Think You Can Dance
WEDNESDAY
8:00 PM – So You Think You Can Dance Results Show
9:00 PM – Glee
The distinctive new comedy from Ryan Murphy (“Nip/Tuck”) starring Jane Lynch (“The 40 Year Old Virgin”) and newcomers Matthew Morrison (Broadway’s “Hairspray”), Lea Michele (“Spring Awakening”) and Cory Monteith (“Kyle XY”). Combining biting humor with a soundtrack of hit music from past to present, the inventive series follows an optimistic high school teacher who – against all odds – attempts to restore McKinley High’s fading Glee Club to its former glory, while helping a group of underdogs realize their true star potential.
THURSDAY
8:00 PM – Bones 9:00 PM – Fringe
When my wife finds out that “Fringe” is going to be competing against her beloved “Office,” she’s gonna be so pissed…
FRIDAY
8:00 PM – Brothers
A new half-hour comedy about a former big-city NFL hot shot who returns home to his family – and his mother’s house – to get his life back on track. Starring Michael Strahan (“FOX NFL Sunday”) and Daryl “Chill” Mitchell (“Ed,” “Veronica’s Closet”).
8:30 PM – ‘Til Death
9:00 PM – Dollhouse
Really? They canceled “Sarah Connor” for this? And do they really think this coupling is going to help the “Dollhouse” numbers?
SATURDAY
8:00 PM – Cops
8:30 PM – Cops
9:00 PM – America’s Most Wanted
11:00 PM – The Wanda Sykes Show – The irreverent Saturday late-night series will feature Sykes’ outspoken comedic perspective on current events along with topical, high-energy roundtable discussions.
12:00 AM – Animation Domination encores
SUNDAY
7:00 PM – The OT (NFL Post-Game Show)
8:00 PM – The Simpsons
8:30 PM – The Cleveland Show – Everyone’s favorite soft-spoken FAMILY GUY neighbor, Cleveland Brown, moves with his son back to his hometown in Virginia and settles down with his high school sweetheart and her unruly kids.
9:00 PM – Family Guy
9:30 PM – American Dad
MIDSEASON
MONDAY
8:00 PM – House 9:00 PM – 24
TUESDAY
8:00 PM – American Idol
9:00 PM – Past Life
A fast-paced emotional thriller inspired by the book “The Reincarnationist.” The series stars Kelli Giddish (“All My Children”) as a gifted psychologist and Nicholas Bishop (“Home and Away”) as a former NYPD detective who work together to explore and unravel mysteries that must be solved in both the past and the present.
Wow, that doesn’t sound at all like “Life on Mars.”
WEDNESDAY
8:00 PM – American Idol Results Show
9:00 PM – Human Target
A full-throttle, action-packed thrill ride from executive producers McG (“Terminator Salvation”) and Simon West (“Con Air,” “Tomb Raider”). Based on the popular DC Comics graphic novel and starring Mark Valley (FRINGE), Chi McBride (“Pushing Daisies”) and Academy Award nominee Jackie Earle Haley (“Watchmen”), the series follows CHRISTOPHER CHANCE (Valley), a unique private contractor who will stop at nothing – even if it means becoming a human target – to keep his clients alive.
Anyone else noting the irony that the director of the new “Terminator” movie is getting a show just as the “Terminator” TV series is getting canceled?
THURSDAY
8:00-9:00 PM BONES
9:00-10:00 PM FRINGE
FRIDAY
8:00-8:30 PM BROTHERS
8:30-9:00 PM ‘TIL DEATH
9:00-10:00 PM DOLLHOUSE
SATURDAY
8:00-8:30 PM COPS
8:30-9:00 PM COPS
9:00-10:00 PM AMERICA’S MOST WANTED
11:00 PM-Midnight THE WANDA SYKES SHOW (working title)
Midnight-12:30 AM ANIMATION DOMINATION ENCORES
SUNDAY
7:00 PM – Animation Domination encores
7:30 PM – American Dad
8:00 PM – The Simpsons
8:30 PM – Sons of Tucson
From three-time Emmy Award winner Todd Holland (“Malcolm in the Middle”), the non-traditional family comedy stars Tyler Labine (“Reaper”) as a charming but wayward schemer hired by three young brothers whose father is in prison.
Welcome back to “Concession Stand,” where Premium Hollywood takes a look at DVDs while indulging in whatever food or beverage has recently been provided to us by a publicist…or, should there be a lapse in the free provisions, we’ll go find something from Dollar Tree, Big Lots, or Ollie’s Bargain Outlet that we’ve never heard of before but which screams to be tasted. Thankfully, however, there’ll be no need to leave the house this go-round, as we have a lovely bottle of spirits which was recently delivered to our front doorstep that will do the trick nicely. Why? Because we’ve decided to tackle a trio of stand-up comedy DVDs, and everyone knows that comedy is always funnier when you’ve got a few adult beverages in you.
The beverage: Three Olives Cherry Vodka. The idea of flavored vodka seems kind of lazy and cost-cutting, doesn’t it? It’s like saying, “Gosh, I’d like to mix my vodka with something to make it taste better, but then I’d have to walk two extra steps to the refrigerator to see what I can add to it, and if there’s nothing there, then I’ll just feel like I’ve wasted my time for nothing, so why don’t I just save myself the trouble and buy a bottle of vodka that already has a flavor to it?”
I’m not quite as lazy as all that, but I can still buy into the inherent concept…and based on the number of flavored vodkas being produced by Three Olives these days, it’s pretty clear that I’m not the only one. They offer – wait, let me take a breath first – berry, cherry, chocolate, citrus, grape, mango, orange, pomegranate, raspberry, root beer, vanilla, watermelon, and, triple shot espresso.
Oh, right, and they also have a plain vodka for you boring old purists out there.
The bottle they sent to me, as you may have guessed from the photograph hovering off to the right, was cherry-flavored. Seemed like the best possible flavor, really, given that A) I can manage to drag myself from the liquor cabinet to the refrigerator, and B) cherry blends well with just about any cola you might have in stock…which is exactly what I did blend it with when I sat down to enjoy the first of these three stand-up comedy DVDs. In truth, I actually had enough stand-up DVDs stockpiled to review more than three while under the influence of cherry vodka, but I figured, hey, why waste a perfectly good opportunity to do a sequel? Besides, three strong drinks could make even Harland Williams’s Har-Larious seem funny…and when you’ve reached that point, it’s clearly time to close the laptop and go to bed.
First off, my apologies for the delay in getting this week’s interview onto the site, though in my defense, today is the earliest it possibly could have gotten up. Saturday night’s victim was out of town on Monday, which is now my new day to do the Victim of the Week interviews, so our conversation had to be bumped to Wednesday instead.
On a related note, please be aware that there will be no interview next week. Why? Because there’s no episode of “Harper’s Island” this Saturday. And why isn’t there one? Because CBS is opting instead to show a rerun of “The Mentalist.” As for why they’re doing such a thing, your guess is as good as mine. I can’t imagine I’m the only person mystified by the maneuver. I mean, presumably, it’s a way to gauge if the “Harper’s Island” fans who’ve followed the show to Saturdays and aren’t watching it on DVR or TiVo will come back if they skip a week, but, damn, come on, CBS, you’ve already annoyed us by shifting it to the weekend. Can’t you at least just run the remaining episodes uninterrupted? Surely we deserve that much.
And just one last thing before we get to our interview: when the show does return, the Victim of the Week interview won’t happen on the following Monday, because that’s Memorial Day Weekend. It will instead take place on Tuesday…and since I’ll be out of town on Tuesday, it remains to be seen if I’ll even be able to do it.
Damn. “Harper’s Island” fans just can’t catch a break…
There’s one major problem which infiltrates “The Last Templar” almost from the moment it begins: they’ve changed a lot of stuff from the original novel by Raymond Khoury. This obviously isn’t something that would be an issue for someone who’s never read the book, but for those who’ve been wondering how it made the transition from print to screen (and who didn’t catch the miniseries when it originally aired on NBC earlier this year), accept this assurance that you’re almost certainly going to be disappointed. Everyone else, however, will probably enjoy the adventure well enough, provided their suspension of disbelief is fully charged. Archaeologist Tess Chaykin, played by Mira Sorvino, is essentially a female version of Indiana Jones, except one who now has a child and isn’t quite as ready to go globetrotting for ancient artifacts as she once was. When four people on horseback dressed as Templars storm New York’s Metropolitan Museum of Art during its exhibition and swipe key artifacts, Tess muscles her way into the investigation, albeit against the desire of FBI Agent Sean Reilly (Scott Foley), and ends up traveling across the world in an attempt to discover the lost secret of…wait for it…The Last Templar.
Veteran producer Robert Halmi Sr. turns in another good-looking yarn, and the cast is certainly strong, with Victor Garber, Kenneth Welsh, and Omar Sharif also on hand. Sorvino and Foley have the kind of chemistry that makes you wish this was a better movie than it actually is. The big action scene at the beginning of the film, where Sorvino swipes a horse and goes jousting in Central Park, is ridiculous enough to lose a lot of viewers right off the bat, and there are more than a few moments where you’ll cringe at the dialogue. (How can anyone not groan when Sorvino punctuates an ass-kicking by snarling, “I’m nobody’s baby”?) Still, the aforementioned chemistry between the leads is generally enough to keep you watching, and those who want to get themselves pumped up for “Angels & Demons” will probably find “The Last Templar” an enjoyable diversion. And if you do, then you’ll also want to watch the making-of featurette on the DVD, which is about as entertaining as these things get.
