Tag: Steven Seagal

Happy Cinco de Mayo, kind of, from “Machete”

Residents of a certain southwestern state take note…

This is obviously a newly recut trailer with that special message from the awesome Danny Trejo — not, I admit, nearly as funny/cool as the one in “Grindhouse.” On the other hand, we now have glimpses of Robert De Niro doing exploitation for pretty much the first time in his career, Steven Seagal, Michelle Rodriguez, the great Cheech Marin, Jessica Alba, Lindsay Lohan (on the comeback trail?), and “introducing Don Johnson.” Heh.

H/t Topless Robot.

Season 1 of “Steven Seagal: Lawman” prepares to wrap up

When I first heard that A&E was offering up a reality series which focused on Steven Seagal’s heretofore-unknown life as a Reserve Deputy Chief of the Sheriff’s Office in Jefferson Parish, LA, I thought, “Okay, this is either going to be really awesome or really terrible.” In the end, it flew right down the middle, proving to be so terrible that it was legitimately awesome, offering the opportunity to get rip-roaring drunk simply by taking a shot every time he references his movie career or anything relating to his knowledge of Zen or martial arts. Still, the first episode kicked ass in the ratings, and it’s become a staple of “The Soup,” with Joel McHale relishing the chance to incorporate a less-than-heartfelt plug for Seagal’s energy drink into the intro for that week’s clip, so I’m guessing that there’s a very real possibility that “Lawman” could well be back for a second season.

I’ve just gotten a clip of the first-season finale, so I thought I’d share it with you:

But, look, here’s the thing: as I read the summary for the first-season finale, it became clear to me just what a tightrope A&E must have to walk to promote this show as a serious reality series to the general public while still acknowledging to critics that they know how ridiculous the whole thing is. The description of the episode starts seriously enough…

The night starts off badly as Deputy Chief Steven Seagal and his team rush to the scene of a man killed in a drive-by. Minutes later they race to another shooting: a man found dead in his car. Two homicides in less than an hour puts the unit on high alert and when they catch four young men out late, Steven has some stern words, but he gets downright harsh the next night when he finds two of them carrying drugs.

…but dig this final line:

But Steven has to get back to Hollywood, it’s time to make his next movie.

Steven knew he’d get stuck taking the anger management class, but when your fellow officer eats the last doughnut…

Oh, well, clearly, a film like “Born to Raise Hell” is far more important that dealing with drive-by shootings and drugged-up punks, based on its IMDb description: “A hard core Interpol agent is assigned to an Eastern European task force to target gun trafficking and dope running throughout the Balkans. While investigating a Russian gun dealer, his team is caught in a bloody street war between a Gypsy gang and the Russians, leaving one task force member dead. Fueled with vengeance, he leads us on an action packed thrill ride while avenging his friend’s death.”

Steven Seagal: saving the world one straight-to-DVD action flick at a time.

© 2021 Premium Hollywood

Theme by Anders NorenUp ↑