Category: External TV (Page 367 of 419)

Bullz-Eye’s Badass Bracket: Elite Eight

The Elite Eight of our Badass Bracket is a who’s who at the job fair of badassity. Do you want to be a martial arts expert or an archaeologist? Maybe you’d prefer the perk-laden but unstable life of a drug lord. Or, if you loathe those who prey on the weak, you can be a vigilante crime fighter. Is a life of protecting and serving more your thing? Perhaps you’d rather be a renegade cop or a mentally deranged Special Forces soldier. Then again, maybe you just want to go medieval, in which case there are at least two positions that are yours for the taking.

Whatever side of the law these eight men fight for, they all have one thing in common: they know that nice guys finish last. Hell, even some of the meanest guys in our bracket (#1 seeds Jack Bauer and Harry Callahan, Tony Soprano, Keyser Soze, Al Swearengen) finished last. Word has it that Indiana Jones has been working on toughening up his act, but every time he practices swearing in the mirror, his father slaps him for committing blasphemy.

Click here to check out the full bracket, and then vote for your favorite badass!

(#2) Maximus vs. (#6) Conan the Barbarian
(#4) John McClane vs. (#16) Indiana Jones
(#3) Rambo vs. (#7) Lee
(#8) Batman vs. (#13) Tony Montana

The latest reason to subscribe to Showtime: “This American Life”

If you’re a regular NPR listener…and if you’re not, why aren’t you?…you’re probably familiar with “This American Life.” Hosted by Ira Glass, it’s a show that offers a glimpse into the lives of ordinary people and manages to make them seem extraordinary. The topics are wide and varied, and it’s a longstanding hallmark of the series that you’ll find yourself enthralled to the point where, if you’re been driving home from work and listening to the show on your car radio, you will sit in your driveway until the story’s over. (Indeed, there’s a collection of the best moments from the series, called “Driveway Moments.”)

Some of the holier-than-thou National Public Radio listeners are no doubt freaking out at the thought that their beloved show is not only coming to television but, in fact, to a cable network to which they’ll have to subscribe to even be able to catch it. Well, after watching the first four episodes, let me assure those folks that, although waiting around for the inevitable full-season set isn’t the worst idea in the world, you won’t be wasting your money if you sign up for Showtime. the network’s take on “This American Life” is absolutely as perfect a transition to television as the show could possibly have managed. Sure, purists may find that, ironically, adding a visual element to the show actually takes away from the effect of listening to these stories…but how many times have you listening to an episode and thought, “Geez, I wonder what these people look like?” Well, now you’ll know. Okay, so you might find Ira Glass a little creepy-looking (my wife was very disconcerted to find that he somehow didn’t look anything like she thought he would, based on his voice), but it’s very cool the way they have him sitting behind a desk at various locations – in a field, in a parking lot – to introduce the segments.

Three of these four episodes are a must-see – the last one, which starts off being about a guy who can identify what a man’s like by the beard he sports but turns out to be a treatise on family and religion, is interesting but a little slow – but the one that’s arguably the most enthralling – at least to a music geek like yours truly – is the one which is narrated by the stepson of Frank Garcia, formerly the bassist for ’80s one-hit wonders Oxo. (You remember “Whirly Girl,” don’t you? “Let me tell you ’bout a girl I know / She’s been to Paris, France / And she can really dance“). I’m sure he’s not the only such person who’s descended into alcoholism while still bragging about his moment of chart glory, but, wow, you rarely see them so exposed on camera. And the thing is, the episode is really more about the relationship between stepson and mother…but Garcia’s so integral to their story that you can’t help but learn a great deal about him as well. There’s also a great episode about a guy who decides to give a band their Best Gig Ever by filling their NYC show with a crowd of folks who are cheering, dancing, and singing along…and how it doesn’t entirely thrill them when they discover after the fact that it wasn’t real.

In just these four episodes, you’ll go through more emotions than you have fingers. I can’t wait to see what the rest of the season brings.

The Office: “The Negotiation”

The promos said that we shouldn’t miss the first two minutes of this episode and they were right. It looked like Roy was going to open up a can of whoop ass on Jim, but Dwight’s pepper spray came out of nowhere. The bit afterward where everyone was tearing up from the spray was hilarious. (So was Dwight’s arsenal of weapons. Chinese throwing stars velcro’ed to the underside of his desk? That’s classic.)

Roy’s turnaround over coffee was pretty unexpected. He knows that Pam needs encouragement going after what she wants – will he be the driving force behind her finally telling Jim how she feels? It doesn’t look like Karen is going anywhere for a while, so this will probably drag out into next season. It’s no matter; it’s not really detrimental to the show. Not yet, anyway.

Now, for a few of the best lines from the episode:

Jan: “What did I tell you about ‘yeppers’?”

Michael: “Wikipedia is the best thing ever. Anyone in the world can write anything they want about any subject, so you know you’re getting the best possible information.”

Toby: “I don’t think Michael intended to punish me by putting Ryan back here with Kelly, but if he did…genius.”

Kelly: “What’s wrong with naming our baby ‘Usher’?”

Darryl: (about Michael’s suit) “He looks like Hilary Clinton.”

Michael: “Toby is the worst human being I’ve ever known.”

(What is Michael’s beef with Toby, anyway? I hope someday they do an episode about why Michael gives him such a hard time.)

Michael: (to Toby, after he threatened to withhold sex from Jan) “What are you writing, pervball?”
Toby: “Just preparing for the deposition.”

Finally, if you missed the tag, Andy returned from his anger management training and caught a face full of pepper spray as a “welcome back.” Supposedly, Ed Helms is now a permanent cast member, which I think is good for the show.

Hibbity-flibbity.

Welcome to the wonderful world of not knowing what’s going on

Thanks Kate, I couldn’t have said it any better myself. Of course, that’s how I usually feel during the average episode of “Lost,” but this week was a little different. This week was pointless. Kate and Juliet were stalked by the smoke monster (only to discover that the damn thing is too stupid to go over a freaking fence), Hurley played a trick on Sawyer, and we learned absolutely nothing new about Kate’s past. In fact, if it weren’t for the fact that she’s part of the whole Jack-Kate-Sawyer love triangle, the writers could very well kill her off with little or no consequence.

Still, some people will undoubtedly call this another great episode, but not because it was actually good. Instead, they’ll point out that we got to see the smoke monster again, that Kate had a run-in with Sawyer’s old flame (Cassidy), or that Sawyer finally warmed up to the rest of the survivors. Oh, and Jack now has feelings for Juliet. Shit. That means they can kill off Kate if they wanted to. Well, what are you waiting for?

All in all, this was a pretty boring episode. And when I say pretty, I mean very. Let’s hope that next week’s episode gets things back on track, because the series was finally starting to get interesting again. Of course, the new addition of Juliet to the survivors’ camp is sure to stir things up. Sayid will have a bit of fun interrogating her, and fans will have weeks to wonder about Locke’s newfound relationship with the Others.

Jericho, Episode 17: I Predict A Riot

Any excuse to make a Kaiser Chiefs reference, right? Well, actually, by the time the opening credits were rolling in this week’s episode, it was less a prediction than a statement of fact; when Mayor Gray decided to kick the refugees out of Jericho because they couldn’t support them anymore…well, the refugees didn’t take kindly to that development. Next stop: Flying Fists, Nevada!

At first, it’s really tough to buy into Gray’s decision – it comes across as harsh even for a longstanding dickhead like him – but upon reflection, exactly what are the refugees supposed to do, really? A few episodes ago, Jericho’s higher-ups made a decision they thought was right, but now that word’s gotten out that the “Marines” who visited the town were a bunch of phonies, people are rebelling in a big way. Basically, the town’s a powder keg, and it’s hard for cool heads to prevail when the dumbasses are so prone to making sweeping gestures like, say, throwing tear gas cannisters into the building where the refugees are holed up. Even when both parties try to discuss things, everything goes horribly wrong. Gray pulls a gun on Roger (you know, Emily’s husband…who, by the way, seems to have gotten his shit together, psychologically speaking, over the course of the last few episodes) but ends up getting shot himself. One of the refugees breaks into Johnston and Gail’s house, probably in an ill-advised attempt to get Johnston’s attention, and things go awry there as well…although visions of Gail’s head being cracked open by a baseball bat don’t come to pass. It’s here that we’d normally get a full-on “Little House” moment, but, instead, when Gail tries to explain that the reason they don’t let the refugees stay in the empty houses is because they’re waiting for the townsfolk who were out of town when the bomb dropped to return, the refugee replies, “Yeah, well, wherever they are right now, I hope they’re not being run out of town.” Ouch. When all’s said and done, Gail convinces Gray to let the refugees stay in the empty houses…except for Roger, who actually gets off easy by only getting banished from Jericho. And since he won’t let Emily go with him, count on the Jake / Emily relationship to be blazing again soon.

Other moments:

* Dale and his new, bestest lady friend manage to swipe back some of the gas that was stolen from Dale, but, like their maneuvers last week, you know it’s just building to some awful payback. My theory…? Dale will be a swinging single again by the end of the season.

* You know, with the whole subplot about Hawkins’ family, here’s what I’m saying: how can we miss them if they won’t go away for even a full episode? Anyway, he only stops by to catch a glimpse of them before he travels to Nebraska to try and complete Sarah’s work (read, “stop the bad guys who she was working for”). We get no closure on this, but based on the news reports that the townsfolk pick up, it does look like the folks in Jericho are about to realize that Hawkins ain’t actually FBI. Had to happen eventually.

My declaration: best episode of the season so far. My God, it’s so good that, with the look at next week’s episode (which indicates that lots of secrets will be revealed), I almost hope the show gets renewed…and in past weeks, I’ve been a long way from thinking as much, so that’s really saying something.

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