Tom Cruise has reportedly given his betrothed an iPod with 300 – count ’em – 300 of her favorite songs to help her keep quiet during her giving birth to the Cruiser’s mutant. Apparently, Tom wants Katie to “listen to calming music.” Yes, well she’s probably into techno and speed metal, and would therefore be insanely loud during the birthing. Does anyone even seriously like Tom Doucher Cruise anymore? How could anyone find anything remotely worth salvaging in his poor little soul? Ah well, at least he’ll have his mutant and will finally be able to dump Katie and get on with his weird little world. I personally can’t think of one movie I’ve seen of Cruiser’s where I didn’t feel like kicking his teeth in after 30 seconds of watching him. Say amen somebody.
Author: Jason Thompson (Page 54 of 67)
“Love Monkey” finds new life on VH1. Hey, I didn’t even realize it got shitcanned. Just shows to go you how much current TV I watch and/or care about. Note that no new episodes are being shot or show, just the original eight that were already completed. Did CBS not even show all of those? Man, that show must have really sucked, but then I’m not surprised at all by that. When I first saw the trailers for it I screamed “You won;t even last a season!” at the TV. God, I love being right. Actually, I think I said “Anything with Jason Priestly is doomed to fail.” Either way, god, I love being right.
Gee, and I already thought he was. But no, Dog the Bounty Hunter will finally be marrying his gal of 16 years, Beth Smith. You’ll be able to thrill to it on “Dog the Bounty Hunter” itself. The guest list includes Danny Bonaduce and Wynnona Judd. Yes! Two folks with past criminal records! Oh well, I won’t be tuning in, like I already don’t tune in to Dog’s show. I’ve seen it a couple times, but I can’t get into bounty hunting unless Han Solo’s got a price on his head and Boba Fett’s coming to kick some ass.
Look to your bookstores next year for a new tome penned by fromer “Daily Show” correspondent/current host of “The Colbert Report” Stephen Colbert. The book as of yet in untitled, but should be a blast of the great journalism that we have come to expect from Colbert into the dark nether regions of the hypocrisy that is everything government and news related. Good times, good times.
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