With less than two months to go before “Desperate Housewives” star Eva Longoria and Tony Parker’s big day, several publications are reporting that the wedding has been suddenly called off. There aren’t many facts to back this rumor up – as Eva was recently seen wearing her engagement ring around town – but if true, this will likely go down as yet another celebrity relationship gone wrong.
Author: Jason Zingale (Page 99 of 154)
Is it just me or has Drama’s role on “Entourage” significantly increased during the second half of this season? Initially used strictly for comedic effect, the older Chase brother is finally coming into his own. His new NBC drama is a certified hit and he’s just been offered a part in Brett Ratner’s latest project, “Rush Hour 3.” Well, sort of. After arriving at Ratner’s bachelor pad (which is just as a sleazy as you expect), Drama discovers that a serious mistake has been made in regards to his invite. The part being offered isn’t meant for Drama, but rather the 17-year-old Tommy that plays his younger brother on the show.
Nonetheless, Drama is determined to get a part in the film; to the point that he flat out refuses to leave until the mistake has been fixed. And it is, to a degree, when Drama finagles the ominous role of the bus driver out of Ratner with the understanding that he’ll have to pay for his own airfare and hotel accommodations. Drama doesn’t see a problem in this negotiation, as he takes the good news back to Tommy with the deal that if he gets the part, he’ll have to pay for Drama’s plane ticket. A bit shady? Sure. But it was classic Drama at his absolute best.
Meanwhile, Vince and Eric join Ari for a meeting with Yair Marx, a potential financer for “Medellin,” and while things don’t get off to a great start (the guy wants Sylvester Stallone to play Pablo Escobar’s dad), Marx respects Vince’s passion to make the film his way. Negotiations are put under even more stress when Vince receives a phone call from Marx’s wife, Nika, asking him to meet her in private. Cautious that the secretive meeting his meant more as a means to seduce him than for business, Vince brings Eric along, and boy do things not go well. Aside from picking on Eric a handful of times throughout the course of the short chat (did anyone else see her whack him in the head with her purse on the way out?), Nika leaves the meeting completely unimpressed.
Fortunately, that doesn’t seem to change Yair’s mind about financing the film, and he invites them all to dinner to celebrate, delivering the $60 million check disguised as dessert. Of course, there’s only one catch: Yair wants Vince to apologize to Nika by fucking her “like a superstar, while I stay down here and play billiards with your friends.” Wow. Vince has obviously dealt with a situation like this before (though his earlier discussion with E about their 10th grade science teacher was a bit creepy), but I can’t see him going through with it. Especially since next week’s previews seem to indicate that they’re still looking for money to begin production.
“Beneath Still Waters”
It’s no secret that Lionsgate has fast replaced New Line as the go-to studio for all things horror, but as we know, with great power comes great responsibility, and that doesn’t exclude releasing every single B-movie horror flick onto DVD. Sure, the direct-to-DVD market is a very profitable business (and if there’s one genre that’s tailor-made for it, it’s horror), but does that mean that moviegoers should forego their expectations of quality because of it? Hell no, especially when men like Brian Yuzna (perhaps best known for producing the horror/comedy cult classic “Re-Animator”) are taking advantage of the system. His latest is a melting pot of bad acting, terrible effects and one of the lamest stories of the year, and it should be avoided at all costs.
“.45”
I truly hope writer/director Gary Lennon never plans to work in Hollywood again. Any movie that opens with a monologue devoted completely to the size of its character’s dick (though his name is Big Al) is suspect to some pretty heavy criticism, but the fact that he continues to insert these “interviews” throughout the rest of the movie only further proves just how lazy of a screenwriter he is. Can he not tell a simple story without some sort of lame voiceover or confessional to do it for him? Quite simply: no. Of course, it never helps when Milla Jovovich and Stephen Dorff (who are having trouble even finding work in B movies these days) are your stars, though Angus Macfayden looks to be having fun with this over-the-top criminal.
“The Mad”
In what can only be described as “Fast Food Nation” meets “Shaun of the Dead,” Billy Zane stars in this horror comedy about disease-ridden beef patties that transform their digesters into flesh-eating zombies. Trying oh-so-hard to be the goofy zombie romp that has since made “Shaun of the Dead” a cult classic, “The Mad” is mildly amusing, but easily forgettable. Zane hams it up as the lead protagonist, a former rocker-turned-doctor on a road trip with his new girlfriend and daughter, but the laughs are too few and far between to consider this a recommendation.
If you’ve been paying any attention to the “Lost” forums over the past couple months, you’re well aware of the heated discussions taking place over whether Dominic Monaghan would be leaving the show following the final Charlie-centric episode of the season. For the time being, it looks like fans can finally put their worries aside, as the London rocker managed to make through the entire episode without even a scratch. Of course, that doesn’t necessarily mean that he’ll be alive and kicking when the two-hour season finale is all said and done, but I’ll get to that later.
The idea for tonight’s episode was a great one. Simply entitled “Greatest Hits,” we were treated to five flashbacks from Charlie’s past that he deemed the best moments of his life (an idea that he no doubt got from Naomi when he heard about the release of a Driveshaft “Greatest Hits” album released in the U.K.). In order from bottom to top they included 5) the day his band first heard their single on the radio, 4) learning how to swim with his dad, 3) receiving his brother’s coveted “DS” ring, 2) being called a hero after saving a woman from a street mugger, and 1) meeting Claire for the first time. The last one was probably a bit obvious, but it had an even greater impact as we watched him say his goodbyes to Claire and the baby. He didn’t exactly tell her where he was going, and it was probably for good reason, too.
You see, Desmond’s had another one of his visions, and this time it involves Claire being rescued by a helicopter. Great news, right? Well, sort of, but in order for the former to happen, Charlie must die. The key to his death lies in yet another hatch (this one underwater) called The Looking Glass, which involves him diving underwater and up into the hatch to flip a switch. Jack doesn’t want him to go on a silly suicide mission, however, and so the plan is called off. Of course, that’s before Carl (remember him?) paddles to shore with news that the Others won’t be arriving the next day as planned, but rather that night. With his plan to blow up the Others (with a shitload of dynamite, no less) still not completed, Sayid suggests that they blow up the TNT by shooting it instead. The rest of the survivors can then make their way to the radio tower and attempt to pick up a signal with Naomi’s SAT phone. This leaves only three survivors on shore, and it’s the group’s best shooters: Sayid, Jin and… Bernard? Okay, I didn’t see that coming.
Nevertheless, Jack leads the rest of the survivors to the radio tower while Sayid, Jin and Bernard prepare for the arrival of the Others. Meanwhile, Desmond and Charlie set off in search of The Looking Glass (which Sayid so brilliantly realizes is marked off by that random cable in the middle of the beat), and as was expected, Desmond offered to take Charlie’s place. I actually thought Charlie was going to take him up on the offer as well, but instead he just whacks him over the head with an oar and dives into the water.
Surprisingly, however, Charlie makes it to the opening of the hatch, but while he’s busy celebrating, a group of women Others surrounds him with guns. Not exactly what Charlie was expecting, but at least it means he has a fighting chance at making it to the next season. I’m personally glad to see him alive, but the wait isn’t over just yet.
Diehard fans of George Lucas’ space epic could run through the list of mythological and historical parallels with little effort, but The History Channel’s special, “Star Wars: The Legacy Revealed,” is still an enjoyable retrospective on the films’ remarkable similarities to classic stories and traditions.
Compiling interviews with entertainment uber-geeks like J.J. Abrams, Peter Jackson, Kevin Smith and Joss Whedon, as well as other notable participants like Tom Brokaw, Newt Gingrich, Stephen Colbert and Elvis Mitchell, “The Legacy Revealed” demonstrates just why “Star Wars” is more than a silly space adventure.
The two-hour special airs on The History Channel on Monday, May 28th at 9 PM (EST). And look for the DVD to hit stores this Fall!
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