Month: January 2007 (Page 12 of 14)

“What? Us, worst-dressed? Surely you jest!”


“Wait, what does jest mean again?”

Fashion maven Mr. Blackwell has released his annual list of best- and worst-dressed celebrities, and a certain Gruesome Twosome of the party circuit has topped the latter for 2006.

Yes, Paris Hilton and Britney Spears are undoubtedly shocked and appalled to be publicly ridiculed for their many fashion transgressions (including, but not limited to, the avoidance of certain silky undergarments). However, the “honor” is clearly well deserved by Britney in particular. Lest we need any further reminders, here’s a flashback of her appearance on Dateline–which was in itself enough to seal the “worst-dressed” deal for the fallen pop star:

But hey: Any publicity is good publicity…right, ladies?

Andrew Dice Clay – beyond has-been

Wanna see the Dice Man wallowing in the post traumatic stress of being washed up? Then check out these two clips of his appearance on Tom Green’s site last year. In the first, he gets pissed off at Green for gently touching his shoulder and threatens to go apeshit on him, and in the second he rants and raves about Val Kilmer for far too long. Perhaps he can be part of some Diff’rent Strokes retrospective and get a few coins. You didn’t forget his glorious cameo on that show did you?

DVD shuffle: 01/09/07

New on DVD this week:

1) Crank – RENT: There’s not a whole lot to say about “Crank” other than its one crazy movie. If you like nonsensical B-movies, than this might be right up your alley.

2) The Illustionist – RENT: By far one of the most underrated films of the year. It’s still only the second best magician flick of 2006 (“The Prestige” earns the top honors in that category), but dazzling performances from Edward Norton and Paul Giamatti make this one not to be missed.

3) The Night Listener – PASS: Some may call this Hitchcockian. I just call it plain boring. Robin Williams continues his streak of making bad films.

4) Idiocracy – PASS: If you didn’t understand why Mike Judge’s lastest comedy was pushed direct-to-DVD, you will after watching it. This is horrible, horrible stuff.

5) Extras: Season One – BUY: If you loved “The Office,” you’ll love “Extras.” And if you didn’t like “The Office,” well, you’ll still love “Extras.”

Box Office Roundup: presence of Ben Stiller, lack of quality effects, acting, dialogue no impact whatsoever on a movie’s popularity

Based on Sunday’s estimates, courtesy of boxofficemojo.com:

1) Night at the Museum: $24 million, $164 million to date (Will Harris, What’s All This, Then?)
We always suspected that all Attila the Hun really needed was a good cry. Dear God.
2) The Pursuit of Happyness: $13 million, #124.1 million to date (Bill Clark: A Don’t Call Me Shirley Joint)
Don’t Call Me Shirley makes big bank on people’s never-ending thirst for sappy feel-good story.
3) Children of Men: $10.2 million, $11.9 million to date (David Medsker, Scary Clown Studios)
A Scary Clown movie enters the top three for the first time in weeks, though it probably won’t be enough to keep his studio from landing in the cellar by season’s end. When the hell is “Letters from Iwo Jima” opening wide?!
4) Freedom Writers: $9.7 million
Believe it or not, this one is a free agent. Seven Strangers dropped it at the last minute to pick up “Primeval,” and before that, Punch and Pie dropped it for “Black Christmas.” Whoops.
5) Dreamgirls: $8.8 million, $54.4 million to date (Bill Clark, Don’t Call Me Shirley)
Billy got coin. Billy got coin. Billy got, Billy got, Billy got coin. And the movie is only showing on 852 screens, which means Billy’s got even more coin coming his way. Look out, Mark.
6) Happily N’Ever After: $6.8 million (Deb Medsker, Punch and Pie Pictures)
Few movies have deserved their 5% freshness rating on Rotten Tomatoes more than this one. The studio brags about the film’s turnaround time. We think they rushed it.
7) Charlotte’s Web: $6.6 million, $66.9 million to date (Deb Medsker, Punch and Pie Pictures)
Official statement from Punch and Pie President Deb Medsker: “If you don’t go see ‘Charlotte’s Web,’ the terrorists win.”
8) The Good Shepherd: $6.5 million, $48.4 million to date (Bill Clark, Don’t Call Me Shirley)
Trivia note: in order to save money, the makeup artists aged Angelina Jolie’s character by punching her in the face.
9) Rocky Balboa: $6.2 million, $60.8 million to date (Will Harris, What’s All This, Then?)
What’s All This has roared out of the cellar, though he’s grateful we’re not doing the “5×5” version of the league, which factors IMDb user ratings (“Van Wilder” sports a rating of 1.7)
10) We Are Marshall: $5.1 million, $35.4 million to date (Kristin Dreyer Kramer, Nights and Weekends)
Official statement from Nights and Weekends President Kristin Dreyer Kramer: “You all suck.”
12) Code Name: The Cleaner: $4.6 million
Sometimes bad things happen to bad people.

Current standings:
1) Reel Times Pictures: $283.4 million
2) TSSU Productions: $275.9 million
3) Punch and Pie Pictures: $256 million
4) A Don’t Call Me Shirley Joint: $234.8 million
5) What’s All This, Then?: $230.2 million
6) Scary Clown Studios: $169.1 million
7) Seven Strangers Productions: $168.9 million
8) Nights and Weekends: $164.1 million

Coming this week: Seven Strangers drops their last movie of the year in the croc-fest “Primeval,” and Don’t Call Me Shirley releases “Stomp the Yard.”

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