Year: 2006 (Page 187 of 228)

Starlets, cover your boobies: Isaac’s back

True to form, Isaac Mizrahi has gone on record as saying that he will not tone down his red carpet antics one iota for Sunday night’s Oscar extravaganza. Widely criticized for his Golden Globe red carpet interviews–which included grabbing Scarlett Johanssen’s breast, questioning various celebrities about their underwear, and asking Eva Longoria about her carpet–Mizrahi remains uncowed by the Academy spokesmen’s remarks that such behavior will be frowned upon Sunday night.

Which is not entirely surprising, actually, given that the Academy’s official threat is that they will be “extraordinarily angry” if the fashion designer does anything deemed inappropriate. That, and that they “cannot predict” what they will do if Isaac goes against their wishes. Well, that’s enough to give anyone pause, right there.

To his credit, Mizrahi has said that the award arrival pre-shows have bored him to tears in the past, and that he was only “asking the questions that interested him,” in an attempt to liven things up.

Mission accomplished. While I’ve tended to skip all but the last half-hour or so of the arrival shows in the past…you can bet I’ll be tuning into E! at 5:30 sharp (Eastern) just to watch this train wreck develop.

You knew it was coming

Just in time for the release of upcoming Tom Hanks blockbuster “The Da Vinci Code,” gay porn outfit PZP Productions will offer some intriguing suppositions about the exact chemical makeup of the paint used to create the famed artist’s masterworks in… “The Da Vinci Load.”

Place your orders now…just like its more respectable doppelganger, “Load” will be made available to the public on May 19. That makes it a few days late to work as a Mother’s Day gift…but moms do tend to love art, especially Renaissance art, so maybe she won’t mind the wait.

American Idol Results

Last night was the “American Idol” results show, where we painfully sit for an hour to learn what we could have easily found out in less than a minute–namely, who is going home this week.

As they usually do on results night, the show started with a group performance of the remaining 20 contestants before whittling things down to 16. This week the group sang Stephen Stills’ “Love the One You’re With,” and though it was cheesy, somehow it wasn’t all that bad.

After this we were treated to the current reigning Idol, Carrie Underwood, singing her current smash hit, “Jesus Take the Wheel.” Okay, I have a few comments here. First of all, Carrie is not a bad singer, but please…….there are at least four better singers this season, and in my opinion there was at least one better singer last season. Bo, you got robbed. Furthermore, and no disrespect to Nashville and its songwriting community, but that song is awful. Does anyone else out there agree with me?

Pat Pat Pat Pat.

That is the sound of Art Vandalay patting himself on the back, because I accurately predicted the outcome last night four times. Yes, last night saw the end for big mouth Brenna, big breasted Heather, big bald head Sway, and big ego David. All kidding aside, it proved that 42 million Americans do have ears, and they voted the right ones off this week.

A sneak peak at next week will follow, but first……can Ryan Seacrest get more annoying with each week? Last night, when the guys were finding out how America voted, he asked each one of them to predict his fate. What are they supposed to say? Most of them offered the right answer…”I have no idea, Ryan.” Ryan, stop being a jackass and just tell us the results.

Next week the following contestants need to step up their performances or they will be on a plane back home: Kinnik, Melissa McGhee, Bucky, and lispy Kevin. After that, it will really get interesting, because the final 12 is when the great singers start to separate themselves from the really good singers. Stay tuned America, and since Ryan Seacrest kept reminding you to vote, I don’t have to tell you to do so. See you next week.

Vandalay, Out.

R.I.P. Jack Wild

The name might not ring a bell, but perhaps the picture will:

jackwild

Jack Wild was Jimmy on “H.R. Pufnstuf,” the kid with the magic flute (and that’s not just a clever euphemism). More people probably know him, however, from portraying the Artful Dodger in “Oliver!” He had a bit of a pop music career as well; one of his semi-hits, “Melody,” was released the month I was born (August 1970). (It can be found on a really swell compilation called Yesterday’s Heroes: ’70s Teen Idols, along with my hero, Leif “I Can SO Get Arrested” Garrett.)

Wild died of complications of mouth cancer, a battle which resulted in the loss of his jaw and voicebox. Ugh. He’d been a heavy smoker and drinker during his life, but, reportedly, he was always a really swell guy. He was only in his early 50s. Shame.

Why weren’t the Russian vampires invited to the block party?

After two horrible months of bad movies, the first weekend of March is starting to look tolerable. Okay, so there’s still the Milla Jovovich sci-fi actioneer “Ultraviolet” to avoid, but besides that, there are a handful of good movies worth spending your hard-earned money on. Along with the first installment of the Russian fantasy trilogy, “Night Watch,” which goes into wide release this week, two new films about city blocks are opening: the Richard Donner-directed thriller “16 Blocks” and the Dave Chappelle documentary “Block Party.” Both movies will still only attract a certain audience, but they’re also both bound to surprise those who wouldn’t usually go to see them. Take a chance this week and check out one or the other. You’ll be pleasantly surprised…

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