I’m not really sure how long this has been up on the ol’ Information Superhighway, but Liquid Generation has taken a comical stab at the whole Tom Cruise/Katie Holmes Scientologish baby debacle. It features John Travolta in full “Battlefield: Earth” gear and a baby alien dancing to “Thriller.” Click below to watch the short video.
http://www.liquidgeneration.com/content/a55hat.aspx?cid=1629
…Or should I say, Vinnie Barbarino Vincent Vega Ewing and Jenny J Lo Fly Girl from the Block Ewing?
Any chance they can shoot Sue Ellen Ewing instead of J.R. this time around? Because, I mean, we already know who shot J.R. (Kristin), and who shot Vincent Vega (Bruce Willis)…but I might actually be persuaded to shell out the cash for a ticket to see this train-wreck-in-the-making if the producers could guarantee me that I would not leave the theatre without seeing Jennifer Lopez take a bullet between the eyes. I’m just saying.
It’s been a long time coming for moviegoers to witness the next great class of comedies, but with any luck 2006 might just be our year. Following on the heels of last month’s political satire “Thank You For Smoking,” the pop culture satire “American Dreamz” delivers another dead-on pop shot at the state of this country.
Of course, you could always go see Jack save the world (again) in “The Sentinel,” or experience the cinematic destruction of another classic video game with Roger Avary’s “Silent Hill,” but why bother? “American Dreamz” is the kind of film just about anybody could enjoy, and you will… immensely. Let’s just say that I’m already counting the days ’til this hits DVD.
And speaking of people who love their brothers just a little too much, former ‘Lost’ stars Maggie Grace and Ian Somerhalder, who played steamy stepsiblings Shannon and Boone, are quietly dating in real life, according to recent reports.
This continues a time-honored tradition of TV boys crushing on their TV step-relatives, one that includes the formidable Greg and Marsha Brady pairing, not to mention the infamous Greg and Carol Brady real-life date. Message boards are already abuzz with comments protesting the so-called “incestuous” relationship…which would be entirely accurate if a) Shannon and Boone were blood relatives rather than stepsiblings, and b) ‘Lost’ took place in the real world rather than a FICTIONAL TV UNIVERSE.
Here’s wishing Shannon and Ian… er, Maggie and Boone…that is to say, Maggie and Ian a relationship that is just as long and fulfilling as every other Hollywood romance.
Good karma does count for something. Recently while drawing $20 from the ATM, a $50 bill came out and I did the right thing and returned it to the bank teller. Yes, my friends, Art Vandalay is a good person. Not only did the bank give me a cash reward, but last night Ace Young got kicked off “American Idol,” just as I had wished for a day earlier.
Of course, even though the show was thirty minutes long, we had to endure the agony of Ryan Seacrest trying to fill time and Rod Stewart performing. Actually the old man wasn’t so bad doing a rendition of “The Way You Look Tonight” from his latest collection of standards.
Then it was all business….Ryan divvied up the remaining seven contestants into groups of 3, plus one.
The plus one was Taylor Hicks, who was immediately told he was safe. I’m not stupid….the reason he was the first to safety was because he got the highest number of votes Tuesday night. Look out America, the fifth Idol just might have gray hair.
Then Taylor was asked to stand by the group he thought was safe…..Elliott, Kellie and Katharine…or Ace, Chris and Paris. He faked a move, shaking Chris’ hand, then moving to the other group…and he was correct. I guess Elliott really is going to keep hanging around….I mean, dude can sing his ass off, so it’s all good. But Kellie not in the bottom 3 after that awful showing Tuesday?
So then it was down to Ace, Paris and Chris and Paris was the first one of the three to be put back to safety. Then it came down to Chris and Ace….look, I didn’t count the votes but I can almost guarantee there was about a 10 million vote differential between Chris and Ace. Vocally at least, there is no comparison. America, you got it right.
Next week, the classically trained Italian pop singer Andre Bocelli will be guiding the Idols as they choose from the greatest love songs of all time. Thankfully we don’t have to see Ace sing a sappy ballad and watch Paula Abdul drool in her Coke cup. But more importantly, we’ve got a half dozen contestants left…..which means we’re only a handful of weeks from crowning our next Idol.
Wow, has this season been a blur? It has, and now we’re left with a final six of contestants that are all worthy of winning it all. Thankfully. See you next week my friends…
Vandalay, OUT.
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