Year: 2006 (Page 106 of 228)

Tommy Chong and the Evil Bong

evilbong

We just had to link to this piece from Cinematical about hacktastic auteur Charles Band’s next movie, “Evil Bong.”

Cinematical got the headline right, but Band has clearly missed an opportunity if he is honestly making a movie about an evil bong, starring Tommy Chong, but does not intend to call it “Tommy Chong and the Evil Bong.”

You’ve got Tommy Chong. You’ve got an evil bong. Why on earth would you call your movie anything other than “Tommy Chong and the Evil Bong.” Rolls right off the tongue, with a lovely rhyming cadence.

And based on that title alone, everyone who becomes aware of this movie is either in or out…just like that other perfectly-named blockbuster-in-the-making, “Snakes on a Plane.”

Now, granted, Band may be avoiding the inclusion of Chong’s name in the title because he wants to protect the egos of his other stars…or because Chong’s character in the movie has a name that doesn’t rhyme with bong…or because Band simply doesn’t enjoy a good Chong-bong rhyme like the rest of us.

But calling this thing “Evil Bong” waters down what could otherwise be a craptastic title for the ages.

Uhhhh….huh-huh. I said “bongwater.”

Better men than him have tried…

…but good luck to Zach Snyder (director of the surprisingly effective 2004 remake of “Dawn of the Dead”), who’s set to be the latest sacrificial lamb to be slaughtered on the altar of “Watchmen.”

Snyder has been attached to direct the film adaptation of Alan Moore’s graphic novel about the dark side of superheroes. But, then again, so were Terry Gilliam, Darren Aronofsky, and Paul Greengrass at various times over the last decade or more, and they all bailed out. So let’s not anyone hold their breath until something…ANYTHING…actually gets filmed.

The latest on the return of “Futurama”

After various rumors about new episodes versus straight-to-DVD releases, it’s now been confirmed that “Futurama” is indeed returning to television…but it’s neither to its original network (Fox) nor to where its gained its post-cancellation popularity (Cartoon Network).

No, sir, it’s going to Comedy Central. 13 new episodes of the show will be premiering in 2008…which is a hell of a long time to maintain one’s excitement, admittedly, but, dammit, I think the fans are up to the task.

Neidermeyer still can’t control a toga party to save his life

A party at the Libby Montana restaurant in Mequon, Wisconsin – owned by actor Mark Metcalf, who played Neidermeyer in the classic comedy “Animal House” (not to mention a stern, disapproving adult in two separate Twisted Sister videos) – got so darned rowdy that the authorities had to be called.

In an article on the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel website, it was reported that, “According to a police report, one officer found what ‘appeared to be a pair of male feet and a pair of what appeared to be female feet’ inside a stall in the women’s restroom. The male feet were those of an 18-year-old Whitefish Bay man who was sitting on the toilet wearing only ‘tennis shoes and a bathrobe.’ He had vomited on himself and did so two or three more times before his parents arrived to pick him up, the report says. The bathrobe, apparently, was this man’s version of a toga.”

Now that’s a party.

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