And try to do it before you ask, “Who’s Lenny Weinrib?” It’ll mean more that way.
If you don’t know who Lenny Weinrib is, however, suffice it to say that you’d know his voice more than his face…so here are a few of the animated / costumed characters who had the good fortune to speak with Weinrib’s assistance. And we’ve saved the worst for last, so try not to hold that one against him…even though I know you will, since I kind of do, too.
Is it just me, or is “Last Comic Standing” moving so fast we can barely keep up? With two comics being eliminated each week in the current three-week span, the field will be narrowed to 6 finalists faster than Ashlee Simpson can rearrange her face and put out a new video.
Last night, the 10 remaining contestants had a Moroccan dinner, complete with belly dancers, before catching a few hours of sleep only to be woken for a bus ride at 3:30 am. The bus took them to an LA radio station where host Adam Carolla was to judge their challenge of the day. Each contestant chose a plain envelope containing a different magazine, and then were given one minute of air time to crack jokes about that magazine. The winner in Carolla’s eyes would be granted immunity, or at least one extra week on the show in which they could not be eliminated.
It came down to Bill Dwyer and Rebecca Corry, but I think Kristin Key got robbed because she was funnier than both of them. I even think Bill was funnier than Rebecca, but Carolla chose Rebecca, who kept reminding everyone else that she had immunity. Can she be any more annoying? And I’m sorry Adam Carolla, but for choosing Rebecca, you are now considered a jackass in my book and a sorry judge of talent. She is nowhere near as funny as ANYONE left in the field. And she’s lucky she was granted immunity because when real people vote on actual stand-up, she will have no chance.
Then we came to the “Boiler Room,” the portion of the show where each comic gets to say that they are funnier than someone else, to determine who will face off in a head to head in front of a studio audience. This week, it was a four way tie between Bill, Joey Gay, Chris Porter and Michelle Balan.
Really? Is anyone stupid enough to challenge Michelle again after she had 83% of the vote last week?
Apparently so.
After a mediocre showing from Joey Gay (all this dude does is shout, it’s his whole act), Chris Porter followed with an utterly hilarious performance. Look, if someone makes my stomach hurt from laughing, they deserve props and that’s what Chris did. Then Bill Dwyer was next, and he was almost as unfunny as Joey Gay. Michelle followed and was strong once again, though the audience favorite was Chris. So Joey and Bill went home and Michelle and Chris went back to the ship.
Thankfully there is a studio audience that knows more about what makes them laugh than Adam Carolla or those stupid judges they had in the preliminary rounds.
And can we say again how not funny Anthony Clark is? Jay Mohr, I know you’re alive because I heard you on Jim Rome’s radio show the other day. Please rescue this no-talent host!
That’s it, it’s time for Art Vandalay to go sell some latex. OUT.
What’s it take to get Barbara Walters emotional? How about being Star Jones Reynolds and announcing you’re leaving “The View” a couple days earlier than planned? Well, that’s what it takes, kids.
Walters said she was taken by complete surprise when Reynolds announced her departure after the first commercial break on Tuesday. The announcement had been planned for Thursday, she said.
Damn you, Star. You and your freakish skinny android-like body.
“I would have loved for Star to have left and not said ‘I was fired,’ and not make it look like the program was somehow being cruel to her,” said Babs.
Oh, come on. It’s time everyone started being cruel to Star. I can’t believe it’s taken us this long to do it.
So, you’ve just split up with your wife, only to discover that she’s now dating your older brother. What do you do? Track down his ex-wife and plan revenge, of course. Well, that’s what Tommy Gavin would do anyways, and it certainly helps when that woman looks like Marissa Tomei. The chances that Tommy actually stays with her after they’ve had their fun, however? About ten percent. It also doesn’t help that he might have the Little C (“Chlamydia,” as cleared up by Lou, who informs Tommy that the Big C is actually reserved for Cancer), compliments of Ms. Turbity, who’s just been arrested for “raping” a couple of her students; and Damien isn’t even one of the kids mentioned.
Can we all agree that things are getting just a little out of hand? First, Alisha “kidnaps” Keela from right under Franco’s nose. Then, Jerry finally hooks up with his lady friend on the same day that Ginny’s brother agrees to help him out with the cost of assisted living, only to have the check torn apart in his face. And finally, there’s Probie, who may just have the most fucked-up relationship of them all. Aside from getting voluntary blowjobs from his male roommate (despite their claims that neither one is gay), the two engage in random fistfights only to make up several seconds later.
It’s official: the series is digging its own grave, and no one can be blamed except for star Denis Leary, who pulls double duty on the show as the head writer, as well. What else is there to say? After last week’s controversial “rape” scene between Tommy and Janet (which received a good deal of exposure from major publications like the Boston Globe), it seems like Leary and writing/producer partner Peter Tolan are going for pure shock value in order to boost the ratings for the series. What a sad, sad world we live in…
It’s where, over the course of just a few months and with just a few snarky remarks, you lose up to two…count ’em, two…co-hosts!
Just a handful of weeks after it was announced that Meredith Viera would be leaving “The View” to take over Katie Couric’s spot on “The Today Show,” which in turn resulted in an announcement that Viera would be replaced by everyone’s favorite lesbian, Rosie O’Donnell, Star Jones has declared herself to be hitting the road as well.
“I’m not sure what the future holds,” said Jones, cryptically, “but I’m absolutely sure who holds the future.”
What? You make a quote like that and don’t tell us who holds it…? FOUL!!!!!
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