Thank L. Ron Hubbard. Don’t thank God, as He didn’t have anything to do with It. But fellow Scientologist flakes John Travolta and Anne Archer are lending support for the cult’s approved method of silent birthing. ‘Cause you know, any of those loud sounds that a baby picks up before birth can have a big negative effect on it later in life. So what about all those other loud sounds in daily life that aren’t human voices? You know, like the sounds of keyboards such as this one merrily tapping away in cynical glee of a hopeful and expected demise of this whole Tomkat charade? Well, I suppose the baby really is safe, as there hasn’t been any thunderous applause for its robot mommy and alien father for some years now. But hey, Anne Archer…yeah, that’s some really super back catching there.
Category: News (Page 367 of 401)
Based on Sunday’s estimates:
1) Ice Age: The Meltdown: $34.5 million ($116.4 million, second week)
Sure, it’s a drop of 50%, but it’s still $34.5 million.
2) The Benchwarmers: $20.5 million (first week)
It will be curious to see whose agent is the first to talk about their client “opening” a movie with a $20 million gross. But what’s really gross is the idea that Molly Sims would ever marry Rob Schneider.
3) Take the Lead: $12.7 million (first week)
We had an invitation to see this movie, but we decided to Take the Night Off.
4) Inside Man: $9.1 million ($66 million, third week)
To steal a recent joke from “The Daily Show,” Jodie Foster’s character is where boners go to die.
5) Lucky Number Slevin: $7.1 million (first week)
The suits will blame the movie’s failure on the title. They should look at their total lack of promotional effort, instead.
Forget all of these: go see “Thank You for Smoking” instead. Just try to resist the urge to stick knitting needles in your eye sockets when Katie Holmes is onscreen.
NBC, performing a maneuver not unlike the one it pulled last year at this time with “Law and Order: Trial by Jury,” is on the verge of pulling the new midseason entry, “Heist.”
Apparently, the show did really well when it premiered in the Wednesday-at-10-PM slot, so the network moved it to the 9 PM slot…against “American Idol” and “Lost,” where, shockingly, it did poorly. So instead of moving it back to 10 PM, the network is now threatening to cancel the show altogether.
I understand that sometimes you have to cut your losses…but when a story has a progressing storyline, you’d think they could at least finish the plot line before yanking it. I mean, way to reward the viewers who have been watching the show. At the very least, let’s hope they make any remaining episodes available online…
If “Joey” does, by some miracle, make it back onto NBC’s line-up, there’s a very good chance it will be without Joey’s nephew, Michael.
Paulo Costanzo has gotten himself another gig…an as-yet-untitled pilot over at CBS…and, given that it also stars Patrick “The Tick” Warburton and Megyn Price (from “Grounded For Life” and, of course, “Larry the Cable Guy: Health Inspector”) AND it’s produced by Adam Sandler’s firm, Happy Madison, there’s every reason to believe it’ll be picked up.
Matt LeBlanc, you poor, poor bastard…
…and, then, that script is usually summarily ruined by a bunch of suits who think they know better than the guy who actually wrote it.
Fortunately, that doesn’t happen all the time, as the Writer’s Guild of America has proven with their selections of the “101 Greatest Screenplays.” Topping the list is “Casablanca,” and rounding it out is “Notorious,” the Alfred Hitchcock film. Somewhere in-between, you’ll find three Charlie Kaufman films…quite an accomplishment, given how recent all those films are…as well as some John Huston, some Woody Allen, and even my boy, Cameron Crowe, for “Jerry Maguire.” (I’d rather have seen “Almost Famous,” but what can you do?) It’s a bit premature, I think, to include “Sideways,” given how many thousands of movies could’ve made it into that spot, and “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind” showing up all the way at #24 seems pretty damned high, even if it WAS a really good movie. Still, there’s a lot of good stuff in there…
But, for the record, it says a hell of a lot about Hollywood…and speaks to the accuracy of my opening line…that, in the 1980s, the script to “Casablanca” was sent to readers at a number of major studios and production companies under its original title, “Everybody Comes To Rick’s.” Some readers recognized the script but most did not, and of those who didn’t, many complained that the script was “not good enough” to make a decent movie.
And, yet, they greenlighted “Police Academy 7: Mission to Moscow.”
Funny old world…
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