Category: News (Page 333 of 401)

Girls just wanna tease sexually frustrated soldiers

Sit tight, American GIs overseas: Lindsay Lohan’s got your back. Or at least, so she says:

“I’ve been trying to go to Iraq with Hillary Clinton for so long,” Lohan, 20, tells Elle magazine in its September issue, after she was asked if she had any big plans for next year. “Hillary was trying to work it out, but it seemed too dangerous.”

She continues, “I wanted to do what Marilyn Monroe did (during the Korean War), when she went and just set up a stage and did a concert for the troops all by herself. It’s so amazing seeing that one woman just going somewhere, this beautiful sex kitten, who’s basically a pinup, which is what I’ve always aspired to be.”

Ahhh, good old Lindsay. None of that empowered feminist bullshit for her: “Make me a sex kitten, and do it now!” Kinda puts your heart right up there in your throat, doesn’t it, picturing a little freckle-faced eight-year-old Lindsay already dreaming of whale tails and push-up bras? It’s good for girls to have dreams.

Speaking of which, Lindsay may be well on her way to accomplishing this particular dream. James Robinson, the Morgan Creek Productions CEO who recently lambasted Lindsay for her shoddy attendance record while filming “Georgia Rule,” would no doubt be more than happy to purchase a one-way ticket to Baghdad for Lindsay. All she’s gotta do is ask.

Set phasers on…roast

So you thought last year’s Comedy Central roast of pneumatic blonde Pamela Anderson was, ahem, a bust?

Never fear. The network has announced its next target, and the intended roastee should afford the roasters plenty of material beyond the basic, lowest-common-denominator body-part jokes that dominated last year’s event.

Ladies and gentlemen, prepare to roast…William Shatner.

No, seriously: Prepare to roast him yourself. The network is soliciting roast videos from the public…so get that digital camera ready, and do your worst.

He can take it. He’s Captain Kirk. Not to mention he’s also…Denny Crane!

The show will air Sunday, August 20.

You need a Penguin? I got your Penguin right here…

In one of the best matches of actor and role we’ve seen in quite some time, Philip Seymour Hoffman has reportedly been offered the role of the Penguin in Christopher Nolan’s sequel to “Batman Begins.” No word yet on whether the Oscar-winner will accept the role (and we’re sure his asking price has just notched up a tad), but we’re hoping the chance to chew some serious scenery (not to mention a few live minnows) will be sufficiently appealing to Mr. Hoffman.

Meanwhile, let’s just hope those Ryan Phillippe-Harvey Dent rumors are simply someone’s idea of a sick joke. I’d cast Reese Witherspoon as the future Two-Face before I’d cast her husband, and any of the other rumored actors up for the part (Jake Gyllenhaal, Liev Schreiber, even Josh Lucas) would do a better job…as would, say, Paul Bettany or Jude Law, if the producers are looking to spread a wider net.

Whom would you cast in the role?

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