Category: Movies (Page 380 of 498)

Nicolas Cage is not a deaf-mute…and he couldn’t be happier about it!

In the 1999 version of “Bangkok Dangerous,” the film’s lead character, Kong, was a deaf-mute assassin for hire. In the 2008 remake, Nicolas Cage plays the lead…but while he’s still a hitman, his name is now Joe, and he can hear and speak quite fine, thank you. There’s still a Kong in the film, however, and that character is still a deaf-mute…but now she’s a pickpocket hired by Joe as his assistant.

Was Cage, a man who has been known to enjoy an acting challenge once in awhile, disappointed about the change for the American remake?

He was not.

“I actually thought it worked out better to have the leading lady have that aspect to her behavior,” Cage told Bullz-Eye, during a conference call to promote the release of “Bangkok Dangerous.” “It made it more emotional somehow. Also, my interests were more about the story of this white man in an entirely Asian world and trying to fit in and trying to connect in some way to the culture.”

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The Promotion

If you were to compile a list of the most disappointing films of the year, “The Promotion” would sit pretty far at the top. Written and directed by Steven Conrad (perhaps best known for penning “The Pursuit of Happyness”), the film stars Seann William Scott as Doug, the assistant manager of a major supermarket in Chicago. When the opening of a new location prompts Doug to apply for the coveted manager position, he’s considered a shoo-in by his boss (Fred Armisen) – that is, until fellow assistant manager Richard (John C. Reilly) decides to compete for the job as well. But instead of proving to the board executives (led by Gil Bellows) why they’re the best candidate, Doug and Richard engage in a juvenile squabble that threatens to ruin both of their chances. Unfortunately, none of it is very funny, and Conrad is entirely to blame. The script just doesn’t make the most of its ingenious setup. As the narrator of the film, you’d think Doug was the main protagonist, but then the focus shifts to Richard, and you’re left to wonder who it is you’re supposed to be rooting for. With the exception of a funny cameo by Jason Bateman as the coordinator of a company retreat, “The Promotion” is a complete bore. It had the potential to flourish as the grocery store equivalent of “Office Space,” but instead, it only feels like a slightly better rendition of “Employee of the Month.”

Click to buy “The Promotion”

Woody Allen is a strange guy

Jennie Tabroff has a fascinating profile of Woody Allen in a recent issue of Newsweek. He’s still superstitious, he’s still terrified by death, and he’s still a depressing person.

But go to meet the director in hopes of a “Tuesdays With Woody”-style affirmation of late-life contentment, and you will be quickly disabused of that illusion. At 72, he says he still lies awake at night, terrified of the void. He cannot reconcile his strident atheism with his superstition about the banana, but he knows why he makes movies: not because he has any grand statement to offer, but simply to take his mind off the existential horror of being alive. Movies are a great diversion, he says, “because it’s much more pleasant to be obsessed over how the hero gets out of his predicament than it is over how I get out of mine.”

Despite his depression, he seems to get along fine. He doesn’t dwell on such things with his family as he tries to spare them from his depressing view of the world, and he manages to keep making films. Not that he enjoys it very much.

“I can’t really come up with a good argument to choose life over death,” he says. “Except that I’m too scared.” Making films offers no reward beyond distracting him from his plight. He claims the payoff is in the process—”I need to be focused on something so I don’t see the big picture”—and he is indifferent to reviews. “I was never bothered if a film was not well received,” he says, admitting that some, such as “The Curse of the Jade Scorpion,” are not great. “But the converse of that is that I never get a lot of pleasure out of it if it is. So it isn’t like you can say, ‘He’s an uncompromising artist.’ That’s not true. I’m a compromising person, definitely. It’s that I don’t get much from either side.”

Very strange.

How To Rob A Bank

“How To Rob A Bank” seems like it should be way more exciting than it actually is. It should be a gripping drama about a guy named Jinx (Nick Stahl) who starts his day battling with his bank over withdrawal fees and accidentally finds himself caught up in a bank robbery and locked in a vault with a sexy tech expert (Erika Christensen). Instead, we get a film full of almost nothing but people making phone calls to each other, and although it only lasts for 81 minutes, it still somehow manages to feel as though it drags on forever. Terry Crews (“Everybody Hates Chris”) remains mostly stoic throughout the flick, with Gavin Rossdale – yes, that’s right: the dude who used to be in Bush but who’s now better known for being married to Gwen Stefani – offering a more than serviceable job as one of the robbers, even if it’s only because British accents almost always make dialogue sound better than it actually is. So how do you rob a bank? If every would-be bank robber had to watch this movie in order to discover the secret, then the number of thefts within our nation’s financial institutions surely would plummet.

Click to buy “How To Rob A Bank”

Postal

The last person that should be making political satires is Uwe Boll, a man that doesn’t even understand the concept of failure, let alone the lines that can and should be crossed in political incorrectness. Loosely based on the video game of the same name, “Postal” opens with the most inappropriate joke of the 21st Century: a view from within the World Trade Center as a plane crashes into it. That image alone is enough to guarantee an immediate boycott by most Americans, and it’s probably a good place to stop watching the film. In fact, even though the scene leading up to the crash is actually quite funny (two Islamic hijackers discuss the veracity of the 100 virgins theory, only to discover it’s not true), the rest of the movie is so amateurishly incoherent that the joke would have been better left to someone who could actually pull it off in good taste. Starring Zack Ward as the nameless protagonist, the movie follows the down-on-his-luck loser as he teams up with his cult leader uncle (Dave Foley) to rob a German-themed amusement park before Osama Bin Laden gets there first. One is looking to steal a shipment of hard-to-find plush dolls, while the other wants the vials of avian flu concealed within them. Can you guess which is which? It doesn’t really matter, since Boll is less concerned about a story than he is with jokes about Verne Troyer getting gang-raped by monkeys and Dave Foley showing his junk. You heard right, and that’s not even the worst of it. Just wait until he takes a dump with his junk still exposed…

Click to buy “Postal”

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