Author: Jason Thompson (Page 65 of 67)

David Cross Gits-R-Done

That adorable David Cross, everyone’s favorite family comic has issued a hilarious open letter to Larry The Cable Guy. Hey, here’s an idea. Let’s give Cross his own show! Oh wait…he already had one. Screw you, HBO. Anyhow, it’s nice to see Cross putting another jackass in his place. It’s hard to fathom why so many folks enjoy that “adult” flavored “Hee-Haw” humor, but then again, I could never figure out why Jeff Foxworthy clicked with so many. Unless it truly has something to do with Wal-Mart taking over the world.

Google goes video

I didn’t know it till just over this past weekend, so I’m thinking you might not know it as well, but Google now has a beta version of Google Video now online. Scour the internet to watch all sorts of clips ranging from homemade music videos, TV clips, full-length features, and so much more. You could literally spend hours getting sucked into all the content. And of course, you can search for what you like (hint: a search for “ipecac” will take you to a particularly funny one for those into the more juvenile types of entertainment). The twisted beauty of the Internet is revealed once again by those mad geniuses over at Google. Man, I’m glad I work from home.

I brake for Esteban and the Magic Bullet.

I can’t stand infomercials. Who can? But I can’t help but fall right in line when it comes to watching the spots for Esteban’s guitar and the Magic Bullet. Give it up for Esteban, anyway, since he was recently even in a Geico commercial. If I didn’t already know how to play E-Z guitar the Mel Bay way (sorry, E, but you’ve got nothing on Mel), I might plunk down for your set, including that awesome chord poster I can hang on my wall and display proudly.

The Magic Bullet’s another story. Who wrote this thing? Why is there a a female Jerseyite in grandma glasses sitting around in her bathrobe smoking at this Magic Bullet party? Doesn’t she know it’s rude to smoke around food before everyone gets blotto? Especially when it’s freshly prepared food in the Magic Bullet! God, but I do so want to make chicken salad in one – two – three seconds! Amazing! Or how about frozen drinks with color coded lids so everyone knows which drink is theirs? Awesome! Now granted you can buy this contraption at Walgreen’s and other fine stores, but they don’t carry the Bullet Blender, which you can still only get as part of the infomercial…

…and why does “Magic Bullet” sound like a sex toy?

3-D Movies Are For The Rich

The kiddies may get a kick out of ’em, but 3-D flicks such as “Shark Boy And Lava Girl” just don’t work much magic on a normal-sized TV screen. Unless, of course, you’re sitting five inches away from the screen with nothing to distract you, 3-D just doesn’t work too well when you’re in your living room surrounded by furniture, toys, empty pizza boxes, and the rest. Surely this is something that works to a much greater effect on a widescreen box. And even then, I’m not sure. Truly, the thrill of 3-D is being hit with those images on a giant screen in the dark theatre.

I will say that my fave 3-D feature is “The Mask,” a godawful b-movie horror romp that seems like it was half-written on some bad acid. The story sucks, and the non 3-D bits are rather dull, but boy when that movie demands , “PUT THE MASK ON NOW,” you’re really whisked away to some surreal crap that scared the bejesus out of me the first time I ever saw it as a kid on TV (the local McDonald’s was handing out the 3-D glasses as advertised in the local newsrag if I recall correctly). I have a copy of it with glasses on an old Rhino-issued VHS tape with Elvira hosting. By the way, is it OK if I never found her sexy in the least bit?

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