Author: Jason Zingale (Page 114 of 154)

Mr. Eko vs. the Smoke Monster

Did anyone else have a feeling that Eko was going to die during tonight’s episode? Well, I sure as hell did (especially after getting half-eaten by a polar bear the week before), and my suspicions only grew as we learned the final chapter of his story before arriving on the island. Anyways, of all the “main characters” to bite the dust thus far, Eko’s certainly had to be the coolest. After being stalked by the Smoke Monster (the same one that caused so much controversy last season) for most of the episode, Eko finally confronted it face to face. Unfortunately, the Smoke Monster is wicked cool and disposed of Eko like a rag doll, bashing him from tree to tree and slamming him into the ground. Eko may not feel like he sinned, but someone sure as hell does. I think the question now is if the Smoke Monster is real or just a part of his imagination, because if that thing’s for real, well, the survivors have a lot more to worry about than a bunch of ragtag thespians.

The rest of Eko’s storyline is pretty much pointless – especially after disclosing the above information – but it is important to note that Locke discovered his body not more than a few seconds after it happened. I know, I know: how convenient. He was just around the corner, however, investigating further into the “Kernel” hatch with Sayid, Desmond and two of the show’s newest characters, Paulo and Nikki. It’s a good thing they brought along the new blood too, since it was Nikki who uncovered a new hint in the orientation video. It mentions several ongoing projects (not one, but several) that the “Kernel” scientists are responsible for surveying, and as soon as Sayid manages to cut in to one of the other feeds, they see some creepy guy with an eye patch staring right back at them. Hmm. More on this later, I presume.

Finally, while Kate and Sawyer took the bench this week, Jack’s ongoing storyline continues. When Ben invites him to Colleen’s funeral (wearing what seems to be either a pair of Jesus PJs or an island-themed cult uniform), Jack brings up his spinal tumor. This appears to have struck a chord with Ben (mostly because he doesn’t want to appear weak in front of Jack, but also because this apparently ruins his “plans”), and he’s more than a little pissed off at the fact that his life is in this stranger’s hands. Fast-forward to the end, however, and we see Juliette secretly relaying a message to Jack informing him that many of the Others are ready for a change, and that they need Jack to “lose him” during spinal surgery. Now, is this for real, or has Ben simply hatched another plan to regain the upper hand? Whatever the case, I don’t think Jack would ever knowingly kill a patient. In the end, this will either earn Ben’s trust or only piss him off even more, and with only one more episode to go before the massive break (three months, to be exact), I have a feeling we’re all gonna find out sooner rather than later.

Rapid Fire Rejects – Halloween Edition

“Rest Stop”
By far the best of the bunch, “Rest Stop” is like a low-budget version of “Texas Chainsaw Massacre” meets “Joyride.” The cast is kept to a bare minimum (which means there isn’t a very high body count), and all the characters maintain the usual level of stupidity that we’ve all come to expect from horror movies.

“Let’s Scare Jessica to Death”
Typical of most ‘70s horror flicks, “Let’s Scare Jessica to Death” seriously questions the competency of Hollywood casting directors. Incredibly grainy and filled with enough extreme close-ups to confirm just how terrible the acting really is, watching this film will make you feel sick. And no, that’s not a compliment.

“The Roost”
After a cheesy opening introduces “The Roost” as the Movie of the Week on a late-night cable access show, it becomes quite clear just how bad this film is really going to be. The acting is horrendous, the dialogue isn’t much better, and the story concept suffers from a lack of originality. Killer bats? Is that seriously the best you can do? Sigh…

“The Curse of El Charro”
A note to horror producers all around the world: we know it’s easy to write characters based on outrageous stereotypes, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s a good idea to group a whole bunch of them into one film. When have you ever seen a circle of friends consisting of a ghetto diva, a goth girl, and a preppy chick? Exactly, never. And that’s not even the worst of it. Please accept the following quote as my official warning:

“James, you two-timing son-of-a-bitch. After all I fucking did for you! I fucking stopped chewing, I learned all of those stupid little strip dancing lessons… I even went down on you inside of a movie theater… and I swallowed for Christ’s sakes!”

Yes, it’s that bad.

That golden rule

It’s been a little while since the last episode (only a week for most viewers, but two weeks for those who watch the show in advance via HBO On Demand), and I almost forgot all of what was going down in David Simon’s world of “The Wire.” Last we saw, Carcetti had won the primary election, Omar was sent to prison on an aggravated murder charge he didn’t commit, and Prez was finally getting a hang of the new school system. Now it seems that Prez has discovered an even better system: trick the kids into learning by teaching them mathematical tips to their favorite games (poker, dice). He’s also discovered new editions of his textbook (along with an unopened computer) down in an old supply closet, but did he ask if he could take them? That most certainly might come back to bite him in the ass if he isn’t careful…

Omar’s still in prison, but he’s got the protection he needs to stay alive: two big, black guys with an undying loyalty for Mr. Little. They’re also some smart dudes, too, strapping Omar with phone books and atlases so that prisoners can’t cash in on the bounty by killing him with a shiv. The blade doesn’t even penetrate his body during the first attempt on his life, allowing Omar to send a message to all the other inmates: fuck with me and get a shiv up the ass. No, seriously.

He must still be feeling a little vulnerable, however, or he wouldn’t have called up Bunk to help in cashing in the Get out of Jail Free card he received while testifying against Bird a few years back. I was a little more than surprised by this move, as I thought that Omar would go to McNulty for help before any one else. Then again, I guess Bunk does sort of owe Omar for finding that lost department-issued weapon last season. At first, Bunk even is a little more than hesitant to help, stating that while Omar may not have done this one, he’s done plenty others. That doesn’t, of course, stop Omar from convincing him otherwise, and while Bunk would love to see the stick-up man go to prison for his dues, he also doesn’t want to see the real killer walk away unscathed. The best that Bunk can do, however, is a low-security detention center, but I can imagine that Omar would gladly take that over the shithole he’s in right now.

Meanwhile, after a meeting with Royce in the mayor’s office, Carcetti sits down to discuss his new cabinet. He’s obviously eyeing Rawls to take over the role of Commissioner from Burrell (a move he made quite clear by choosing to sit next to the former during a visit to police headquarters), but his constituents warn him otherwise. A newly elected white mayor cannot fire a black Commissioner, especially considering he won over a lot of the black voters with his promise for reform. So, instead of sticking with Burrell, Carcetti goes a-looking for a replacement, and might have quite possibly found one in Major Daniels. This guy has really been lucky with promotions over the last two seasons, but because he’s the only other major black police character on the show (Bunny Colvin would have been a much better choice pre-retirement), there really isn’t any other choice. I can’t wait to see Burrell’s breakdown over this, since Carcetti does kind of owe him for all the insider information he delivered throughout season three.

In fact, Carcetti’s very own victory is going to start being questioned over the next couple weeks, especially now that the murdered key eye witness case (that he used as the basis for his attack against Royce) has been solved by Greggs. It seems like it wasn’t even a planned hit after all, but rather a stray bullet that just happened to miss a bleach bottle (being used as a target) and kill the guy. Sometimes, even the most difficult cases are the easiest. Greggs is officially 1-for-1. How much longer do you think she’ll stay before bouncing back to Major Crimes? Here’s hoping for a big reunion in the final season…

The homo is out of the bag

Bruno

“Borat” star Sacha Baron Cohen has been eagerly trying to keep his next project under wraps, but when a five-studio bidding war is taking place, it’s kind of hard to keep the secret for very long.

That’s right, folks, Cohen will be bringing Bruno – his third and final “Da Ali G Show” character – to the big screen (Ali G was the first character to make it to the big screen, but the film never came out in theaters in the US). A gay fashionista who mostly intereviews people in the entertainment and fashion world, as well as extreme conservatives and religious figures, Bruno should offer plenty of room for the same shock comedy strategy that “Borat” employed so well.

Universal Pictures is currently winning the bidding war at $42 million, but The Hollywood Reporter is stating that Sony, DreamWorks, 20th Century Fox and Warner Bros. are still very much interested in the project. Here’s hoping that Fox wins out in the end. I mean, they have already done a great job with Borat…

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