What if Stewie from “Family Guy” were an S&M-loving ballerina? Or a flasher with disco boots? Or…well, you decide, at the new “Pimp My Stewie” web site.
Have fun.
Author: Deb Medsker (Page 21 of 70)
Actor Wesley Snipes has been indicted on eight counts of tax fraud, having failed to file a return with the IRS for any of the years between 1999 and 2004. Snipes is accused of cheating the government out of an estimated $12 million in taxes, and stands to face up to 16 years in prison if found guilty on all charges.
Snipes would already be under arrest if it weren’t for one small problem: authorities don’t know where he is. Odds are he’ll continue to make himself scarce for the foreseeable future, and between the guy’s base-running stats and his demonstrated skill at slaying bloodsucking fiends…he may be a tough one to bring in.
Seriously, guys: If you’re wack enough to put a tattoo of some so-called rock star all over your entire back…could you at least make sure it’s a star of higher caliber than Adam freaking Duritz?! Have we no standards left?
I mean, honestly, if you’re not afraid of scaring children on the beach with the vision of Adam’s bloated, disembodied, dreadlocked head floating away from them every time you turn your back…you might as well just go whole hog and take a page out of Steve-O’s book:
But at least Steve-O’s is intended to garner laughs, whereas yours will all be accidental. See the difference?
Let’s be clear: You’re allowed to like Counting Crows. You’re allowed to buy all of their CDs, and listen to them as often as you want. You can wear their t-shirts, and put their posters up in your bedroom, and spend all of your spare cash on tickets to watch them in concert. You can even believe, deep down inside, that Adam Duritz is a hip, cool, deeply attractive man. You’re just not advised to ink his face all over your latissimus dorsi. Got it?
Okay, then. No more needles for you, mister! Friends don’t let friends desecrate their bodies with images of whiny, faded 90’s alt-rock artists…no matter how much you might want the orderlies giving you that sponge bath in the nursing home forty years from now to wonder why you put a giant Troll doll in the middle of your back.
It’s just not worth it. Trust us on this.
Tori Spelling is expecting a child with her new husband, Dean McDermott. Spelling and McDermott are reportedly thrilled to announce their news, as it provides a substantial bright spot in the wake of her father Aaron’s passing and her mother’s inequitable division of the Spelling estate’s assets.
While Tori is saddened that her father will never get to meet his new grandchild, she consoles herself with the knowledge that the man who cast his daughter as the staunchly virginal Donna Martin also died before ever receiving incontrovertible proof that she had actually had sex with anyone.
Actress Keisha Castle-Hughes, nominated for an Academy Award at the age of 13 for her lead role as a spunky Maori tribe member in 2002’s “Whale Rider,” recently announced that she is expecting a child this spring.
The now-16-year-old actress is looking forward to raising the baby with her 19-year-old boyfriend, Bradley Hull, a New Zealand-area actor whose interests include fishing, windsurfing, and statutory rape.
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