Month: June 2008 (Page 2 of 9)

And our very special guest star…Fred Willard!

Show: “Stargate SG-1”
Episode: “Family Ties” (Season 10)
Role: Jacek

It has been said…by me, if by no-one else…that when it comes to guys whose mere appearance in a film automatically guarantees that it won’t be a complete waste of time, there’s a tie for the spot at the head of the class between Larry Miller and Fred Willard. I don’t have a bad word to say about either of them, but it must be said that, of the two, Mr. Willard has probably managed to be funny in more different genres.

Yes, even in sci-fi.

Fred Willard

Although Willard earned major geek points by appearing in episodes of “My Secret Identity” and “Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman” (as the President of the United States, no less) and providing voiceover work to “Buzz Lightyear of Star Command,” “Transformed: Animated,” and “The Batman” (he’s also in “WALL*E,” for that matter), the one full-fledged science fiction role on his resume is that of Jacek on “Stargate SG-1.” From the moment the character first appears, two things are clear: 1) Jacek is going to be the episode’s comedy relief, and 2) Willard is going to play this part just like he plays any other part, even if it is on a sci-fi action / drama.

Though the episode technically begins with Vala Mal Doran (Claudia Black) and Lt. Col. Samantha Carter (Amanda Tapping) returning from an off-base shopping trip, the excitement doesn’t start until the gang at SG-1 get an unscheduled video transmission. “Hello? Is this thing working?” shouts Jacek, into the camera lens. He introduces himself, explaining, “I don’t get out to your end of the galaxy very often, but I have a friend who lives in the area, and he speaks very highly of your people.” Jacek claims to possess information which reportedly could impact the very survival of Earth, but the information that proves far more interesting comes when Vala identifies him as her father.

Jacek: Vala, is that you? Sweetheart, how is life treating you?
Vala: Certainly better than you ever did.
Jacek: Ouch! I suppose for the benefit of your friends there you’re going to want to list all the reasons why I was such a bad father.
Vala: Oh, I wish I could, but a wormhole can only be maintained for 38 minutes.
Jacek: Ah, you’ve got your father’s wit…
Vala: It’s hardly enough time to cover your inadequacies as both a parent and as a human being in general.
Jacek: …and your mother’s uncanny ability to hold a grudge.

Jacek asks to be brought through the Stargate in order to reveal his information, but Vala refuses to vouch for him; she changes her tune, however, when he reveals that what he knows has to do with a plot to destroy Earth that Arkad set into motion prior to his death. “Take your time, there’s no pressure,” says Jacek. “Just that your whole planet could very well blow up at any moment.”

Cut to the SG-1 team preparing to retrieve Jacek.

Continue reading »

Secret Diary of a Call Girl: Season One, Ep. 2

Belle’s got a special date tonight, but it’s more of a “where” than a “who.” A client, Alexander, is taking her to a chic private sex party – the sort of thing you need an invitation to get into, and something she’s always dreamed of attending. She’s vamped out in a little back dress, an elaborate choker, and a neat black wig – ready to enjoy a night of decadence. But such nights often don’t go as planned, and she ends up in the most unexpected of places as the dawn crowns a new London day.

Alexander (Aleksandar Mikic), like any of Belle’s clients, has expectations and demands. He is paying for a service that she is there to provide. He needed date for the party, but he also appears slightly geeky and inadequate. Belle isn’t just his ticket in; he also plans to own her and her every move for the night. At first things go as planned as they take in the ambience of the situation and visit one room after another. It is an elaborate setup, in a safe “Eyes Wide Shut” sort of way, although without nearly as much naked flesh on display. (The lighting, in fact, echoes the strands of lights that decorated Sydney Pollack’s party at the beginning of that movie.) Alexander tells her he doesn’t plan to have sex with her at the party. He’d prefer to wait, and have one man after another lust over her, and then after they leave when she just can’t take it anymore, he’ll ravage her at home. On cue, Belle looks at the camera in disbelief.

The pair is momentarily separated when Belle clumsily bumps into another man (Jamie Sives), spilling wine all over them both. They apologize and flirt and he goes on his way. She tells us she recognizes him, and that could be awkward. She must go through her mental Rolodex of all the men she’s slept with. “This could take a while,” she deadpans. She realizes that she doesn’t know him personally, but rather he happens to be one of her favorite authors, Jay Lorre, and she recognizes him from the backs of his books’ dust jackets. She tracks him down again, only this time he’s with someone – maybe his wife, maybe his girlfriend, maybe his date. In any case, the woman exhibits no jealousy as he and Belle talk each other up. Just as things begin to heat up, Alexander shows up to stake his claim. He drags Belle away from a far more interesting situation.

But Belle isn’t about to give up that easily. She hooks up Alexander with another woman by engaging them in some geekspeak and she once again heads off to find the writer. This time things get considerably more heated and they end up in one the back rooms where anything goes. There’s a fairly tasteful shot of a guy banging a woman in the background. You can’t see anything and yet you can see plenty. Belle and Jay get into the mood and fall back on a bed. Before she knows it, his partner is right alongside them, and Belle engages in a lengthy kiss with her. (Stop me when I begin sounding like a Harlequin romance novelist.) Things are definitely going in the right direction and it’s no doubt a very hot scene. Suddenly Belle realizes her professional duties. She tears herself away from them with the promise of more to come. She enlists the aid of a waiter and then finds Alexander. The waiter shows up and tells he she’s got an important call on the emergency line. There is no call, but Belle and the waiter exchange pleasantries as she buys some time. When she returns to her client, she tells him she must go “for personal reasons.” He’ll of course get a refund. The poor guy’s evening is a bust, but we don’t really feel sorry for him. After all, Belle’s got a far more exciting journey to go on – finishing the night off with the couple. Just as she’s ready to head off with them, she checks her phone only to find several messages from her family. “For personal reasons” she must now leave the couple as well.

Enter Hannah, as Belle removes the wig and choker, and she goes to the local hospital where her sister has just given birth to a son. Her family, as well as best friend Ben (Iddo Goldberg), are all there, and somewhat surprised by her dress, which she explains away as part of a work function. The sister in particular is snotty and seems annoyed that Belle is never around for anything important. Ben drives Hannah home in the morning and finds the black wig in her purse. He’s not sure what to think, but knows that she wasn’t doing anything that had to do with work. Hannah climbs into bed (but not before showing us a fantastic shot of Billie’s butt) with a Jay Lorre novel and rationalizes that at least she can be in bed with her favorite novelist, even if it isn’t quite the way she expected.

This was a nice episode, slickly shot and full of humor, that eventually further underscored the dual Belle/Hannah lifestyle. Belle was much easier to like here, especially in her attempts to ditch Alexander, a guy that’s very difficult to care about. Likewise, her dealings with the writer are an interesting setup that we wish would pay off. There’s a voyeuristic quality to the episode, more so than last time. I think this show is corrupting me and making me into a much dirtier person than I really am. (Yeah, right!) As far as the recent news items claiming Piper thinks her career may be over since she’s showing some skin, I don’t think she’s got much to worry about. (Further, I believe her comments have been somewhat taken out of context – I think she was half joking.) The first episode of this series scored Showtime its highest ratings ever for the premiere of a new series.

The Delirious Fictions of William Klein

The best reason to pick up this “Eclipse Series 9” from Criterion is the inclusion of the great “Who Are You Polly Magoo?” Made in 1966, the film is a wonderful satire of the silliness of the fashion and modeling industry – well before it was fashionable itself to make fun of such things. In the other two films included here, “Mr. Freedom” and “The Model Couple,” director Klein continues to point his satirical lens on such things as American imperialist ideals and the humdrum drudgery of middle-class life and its societal trappings. The two films aren’t always as bracingly hilarious as “Polly Magoo,” but no one can deny that it’s a treat to have all three of these works finally available on DVD. For those who aren’t familiar with Klein’s work, this is definitely a great – and affordable – place to start. And not to worry about these being uppity arthouse flicks; Klein’s work can be enjoyed easily by all who care to experience them.

Click to buy “The Delirious Fictions of William Klein”

The Next Food Network Star: Bye Bye Bollywood

Are you on board yet? I’m telling you, this show rocks, despite the fact that the Food Network airs it so late at night on a Sunday (10pm ET).

Anyway, last night Episode 4 began with the remaining seven contestants having to perform a 60-second info-mercial for Food Network personality Tyler Florence about a specific task that they were assigned on the spot. For the second and main challenge, they were asked to come up with a fish dish for possible “syndication” on Red Lobster menus nationwide, and then Iron-chef style, had to make a second fish dish with a strange ingredient. They had 45 minutes to prepare their dishes on a Coast Guard ship to serve members of the Coast Guard along with the judges, including Iron Chef Michael Simon. Here is how it all went down, by chef…..

Kelsey had to “french” a rack of lamb for her video shoot Continue reading »

Five Reasons to Mourn George Carlin That Aren’t Stand-Up Related

5. Herbie Fleck (“With Six You Get Eggroll“)
4. Eddie Detreville (“The Prince of Tides“)
3. Frank Madras (“Outrageous Fortune“)
2. Cardinal Ignatius Glick (“Dogma“)
1. Rufus (“Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure,” “Bill and Ted’s Bogus Journey“)

I also remember enjoying “Justin Case,” a TV movie that was written and directed by Blake Edwards, where he played the ghost of a private detective who attempts to solve his own murder…but it’s been 20 years since I’ve seen it, so I might be giving it too much credit.

So long, George.

« Older posts Newer posts »

© 2026 Premium Hollywood

Theme by Anders NorenUp ↑