Life is good. Especially when Spider-Man and Batman team up to beat up some punk on a busy street corner. I especially like the way Spidey called the guy “motherfucker” at the top of his lungs while jumping up and down.
Month: December 2007 (Page 4 of 8)
…The Munsters’ Scary Little Christmas.
What on earth possessed Universal to suddenly release this 1996 made-for-TV flick onto DVD for this holiday season? I mean, it’s not like they haven’t had a decade’s worth of Christmases to get it out there, and it’s not like the popularity of “The Munsters” has suddenly soared. Well, whatever the reason, it’s here now, so let’s take a look at it, shall we?
As you can probably tell from the cover art, that ain’t Fred Gwynne playing Herman Munster. It’s always a dicey proposition when you take iconic TV characters and recast them – sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t – and this wasn’t Universal’s first attempt to bring back “The Munsters.” Only a year earlier, they’d done a TV movie called “Here Come The Munsters” which featured Edward Herrmann as Herman (yes, the patriarch of the Gilmore family once sported green make-up and neck bolts), Veronica Hamel (“Hill Street Blues”) as Lily, Robert Morse (“Mad Men”) as Grandpa, and Christine Taylor (a.k.a. Mrs. Ben Stiller) as the family black sheep, Marilyn. Presumably, it did pretty well, since it quickly spawned a sequel, but for whatever reason, every single role was re-cast. In “Scary Little Christmas,” Herman’s played by Sam McMurray, who tends to pop up on various sitcoms as the boss who thinks he’s way cooler than he actually is (he played Doug’s supervisor on “The King of Queens” and Chandler’s boss on “Friends”); Lily is now portrayed by Ann Magnuson (“Anything But Love”), Grandpa by Sandy Baron (he was Jack Klompus, the retiree on “Seinfeld” who foolishly told Jerry he could keep his pen), and Marilyn by the crazy-hot Elaine Hendrix, who wears spectacularly short skirts…and wears them well.
Personally, I always preferred “The Addams Family” to “The Munsters.” The latter always drifted way too much into slapstick for my tastes…and, as expected, this flick is very much in keeping with that tradition. There are several storylines running throughout which echo classic material from the original series – Eddie’s depressed, Marilyn’s found a new guy, Grandpa’s having trouble getting an experiment to work right – and they’re interspersed with the holiday-themed plots, including a holiday house decorating contest and, most importantly, Grandpa accidentally bringing Santa and two of his elves into his laboratory. As Grandpa tries to get Santa and his elves back to the North Pole in time to make his rounds, the elves are more interested in going to a bar and partying, while a potion error turns Santa into – scout’s honor – a figgy pudding. The highlights include the inspired casting of Mary Woronov (Miss Togar in “Rock and Roll High School”) as the neighbor who desperately wants to beat the Munsters in the decorating contest, the underutilized plot thread of the Munsters’ Christmas party (every Universal monster you can think of makes a cameo at the party, but the funnier bits come earlier on, when they’re receiving their invitations), and, okay, those short skirts of Marilyn’s really were awesome.
It’s a fair bet that fans of the original series will just cry “blasphemy” and take a pass on this flick, and I can’t really blame them, but most kids will really enjoy it…and, yes, even the little kid in me was entertained enough to feel like it was worth my time to have watched it. Of course, the adult in me probably just kept watching because of Elaine Hendrix, but, c’mon, look deep into those gorgeous eyes and tell me you don’t suddenly feel a burst of Christmas spirit yourself.
Yeah, I know, I could’ve made a far more tasteless joke about feeling one’s Yule log stirring. But I do have some standards, you know.
Am I wrong? Does anyone else remember this? It was a single-season wonder that aired on CBS, and it can’t possibly live up to my memories of it, but I really dug it at the time. You can read more about it here, but, basically, the series focused on Drak, Frankie, and Howler, descendants of Dracula, Frankenstein’s monster, and a werewolf (don’t ask me how the monster managed it), who decided to atone for their ancestors’ wrongdoings and unite as a superhero team called the Drak Pack. I’m sure my unabashed love of the Superfriends at the time had everything to do with why I loved it so much, but, c’mon, if you set aside the whole Frankenstein-spawning-an-heir thing, it’s a really cool concept, y’know?
Now, if someone would just release the live-action series “The Monster Squad” (no relation to the film of the same name), I’d really be happy.
…Christmastime in South Park.
No surprise here: when the holidays begin to approach, there’s a sudden influx of Christmas-themed DVD releases which arrive for our perusal, so I figured that Premium Hollywood was as good a place to tackle them as any. Now, everyone knows that there’s a real unfortunate tendency for these things to get really, really schmaltzy…but in the case of “Christmastime in South Park,” which features all seven of the series’ Christmas episodes from 1997 through 2004, that’s decidedly not the case.
I haven’t been a dedicated “South Park” viewer since…hmmm, I’d have to say my regular viewings stopped right around the time I first started dating the woman who would become my wife. Coincidence? Nah, not really. My wife would be the first to tell you that she has limited tolerance for the show; she’s laughed at it on occasion, but as intelligent as the show can be, she just can’t handle the gross-out comedy…and given that the first episode on this disc introduces Mr. Hanky the Christmas Poo, it won’t surprise you that I watched this all by my lonesome.
Each of these episodes have their fair share of laughs, but the legitimate classics definitely come toward the beginning, such as Mr. Hankey’s inaugural appearance, the hilarious visit by the guys to experience a Cartman family Christmas which results in a lovely number from Charlie Manson, and “Mr. Hankey’s Christmas Classics,” which takes a cue from the legendary “Star Wars Holiday Special” (complete with the ridiculously obscure “fighting the frizzies” reference) and presents a variety-show-styled visit with the various citizens of South Park.
As the show continued, however, it’s clear that Matt Parker and Trey Stone wanted to keep doing holiday episodes but weren’t exactly sure what was left to parody, so in 2000, they went after…themselves! Yep, they make fun of the original “South Park” short that they’d made as as a digital Christmas card; unfortunately, however, Comedy Central completely misses the boat by not including that short as a special feature. “Red Sleigh Down” is a return to greatness, however. It’s a brilliant send-up of action flicks, with Santa trying to bring Christmas to Iraq, only to get shot down, captured, and tortured. His savior? Why, Jesus Christ, of course! The following year’s special, “It’s Christmas in Canada,” proved comparatively disappointing, unfortunately; as ever, the shots at Canada are spot-on and hilarious, but as a Christmas episode, it’s rather lacking.
The last episode on the disc, “Woodland Critter Christmas,” is another one of those episodes that, as I was watching it, made me remember exactly why I haven’t watched “South Park” regularly in quite some time. Yes, it’s a genius parody of the cuter-than-cute Christmas specials that are chock full of anthropomorphic animals who celebrate the holidays just like people do, but when it turns out that the animals’ religious beliefs lean toward the dark side – there’s a delightful blood orgy sequence – and the plot involves baby cougars learning how to perform an abortion, all I could think was, “Oh, God, my wife wouldn’t have made it more than five minutes into this.”
Not that I didn’t laugh, you understand. But, uh, yeah, I can kinda see why she has a problem with the show.
In closing, here’s that aforementioned first “South Park” Christmas short, complete with Spanish subtitle for no apparent reason:
In the season finale of “Kitchen Nightmares,” Gordon Ramsey ventures out to Moorpark, California to revamp the failing Secret Garden restaurant. The restaurant features French food and a chef/owner named Michel who is very full of himself and his foo-foo menu. He’s also about 300K in debt and needs help because no one is eating there anymore.
After finding that the front door to the restaurant does not even function and having to enter through the back, Ramsey sits down to sample the food. He orders a salad with garlic shrimp and strawberries, and some kind of steak with fried potatoes on top. He sends the salad back, saying that it’s disgusting. Then he says the steak is tough and that the potatoes are just a greasy mess on top. I’m grossed out already, are you? But then Ramsey goes into the kitchen and tells Michel his food sucks.
He then tells him that he’s too far up his own ass to care about anything. Wow. But this was just setting the tone.
The next day, Ramsey inspects the kitchen and finds mold growing in the refrigerator. He makes the entire staff spend the day cleaning the kitchen, after which they prepare for the dinner service that night. Ramsey is mortified that many people are ordering this strawberry “canape,” which is a tiny appetizer. He also notices that every meat entree is crusted in something and says that the menu needs to be simplified for things to run smoother. When he presents this idea to Michel, he is furious and argues with Ramsey some more. But Ramsey wins out and some of the items are presented at the dinner service, which nevertheless gets backed up due to a lack of communication among everyone.
Michel winds up snapping at his servers, making some of them cry.
Then Ramsey has his design team come in as he always does, and gears up for a revamped dinner service with his menu in place. Michel is worried about the changes, saying they will hurt his business rather than help. But since most of Michel’s customers are senior citizens, Ramsey thinks a newer, fresher menu will attract some younger folks too.
The restaurant is packed that night, and a food critic is in attendance as well. That critic sends back her fish dish, saying it’s too salty and over-seasoned. This prompts Michel to revert back to his old menu, which makes Ramsey call him a lazy pig (with many f-bombs thrown in) and storm out.
But Ramsey decides he can’t give up on The Secret Garden and winds up going back. After the critic tries something from the newer menu, she raves about it. Then Michel polls some of his customers and finds out that they all love the new menu items. He admits to himself and to Ramsey that he had been wrong, and that he will go along with the new menu. It doesn’t hurt that he made a ton of money that evening. He even promotes his top server, Jane, to manager.
This one winds up having a happy ending, when it appeared Ramsey might just bail out on the stubborn French chef.
It’s been a fun season, and who knows if the show will be back for a second season. But it sure is interesting seeing how Gordon Ramsey can whip people into shape in a matter of days and turn things around. See you all next month for the return of “American Idol.”
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