Year: 2006 (Page 87 of 228)

A change will do you good

Probie’s a hero. At least for one week, though the previews for the next episode don’t look as promising. Still, not only did he manage to courageously rescue two trapped firefighters within the opening minutes of the show, but he also won the firehouse $15,000 by accidentally betting the wrong horse from Jerry’s “hot tip.” It’s good to see the newbie getting some face time after playing a background character in the first half of the season. Of course, it’s only going to get worse from here if he really is gay. Just look at the way Jerry treats his gay son, and that’s his own blood. And to add to everything else, Tommy finds out that Probie has put in for a transfer. Bad time, really, since he’s the top dog in the firehouse until the next big rescue.

He’s not the only one making some changes, either. After uncovering a two-page news spread about Con Artist Hooker Girl getting nabbed by the cops for dealing drugs, Lou has an epiphany: treat my body better and enjoy life. And in celebration of his Depression Emancipation, Lou’s decided to start a whole new-age health program that includes yoga classes with an instructor named (get this) Epiphany. Oh, and did I mention Sean and Maggie are getting married? Yeah, well, he was pretty much tricked into proposing to her, but something tells me this isn’t going to last. I mean, does Maggie really look like the kind of girl that wants to settle down anytime soon?

Meanwhile, Uncle Teddy actually does get married to Psycho Prison Chick (she has a name now, and it’s Ellie), and Franco picks up a hot chick (with brains, too) at the bar. Unfortunately, while it’s nice to see the guy finally moving on after the whole Alicia disaster, shouldn’t he be more worried about when he’s going to see his daughter again? This is probably something they should be addressing in the near future, if not already. Maybe they’re just waiting for him to get a little closer to this new girl, and then they can use that against him as a means of forcing her out of his life. Hey, we’ve seen it happen before.

United Airlines institutes ban on black women with attitude, hair dryers

Plus-size African-American comedian (and apparent front-runner for “The View”’s Star-Jones-size vacancy) Mo’Nique claims she was recently ejected from a United Airlines flight for racist reasons:

The incident started when her hair stylist stashed a hair dryer in a first-class bin. While Mo’Nique was flying in the front of the cabin, her aide was in coach.

The “Showtime at the Apollo” host said she tried to keep her cool when a flight attendant first questioned the stylist’s actions. But things escalated when another flight attendant allegedly refused to believe the beauty tool belonged to Mo’Nique.

“Tell your people that the next time they have an attitude, they are being thrown off. … Since 9/11, we don’t play around,” one flight attendant allegedly told Mo’Nique.

“Are you equating my hair dryer with 9/11?” Mo’Nique said she retorted.

Representatives for United denied the allegations of racism, and indicated that they would be happy to eject hefty white-woman-with-attitude Rosie O’Donnell from a future flight in order to demonstrate their race-neutral approach to inconveniencing customers.

The State rescored and coming to your home

Score one for the fans and one for the lowly music business who keeps good shit from flowing through. The State, MTV’s sketch comedy which featured the likes of Michael Ian Black, Thomas Lennon, Keri Kinney, and Ben Garant will finally be available either on DVD or iTunes later this year.

What was keeping it from being released all this time? The music used in the episodes, of course!

“They just rescored and we’re all doing ADR,” Garrant continued.
“The thing that was preventing it was the music clearances,” Lennon explained, “because at the time, MTV had a deal that anything with a video you could just use. No longer the deal.”

“All our sketches that were built around a Breeders or a Lenny Kravitz song, which was a lot of them,” said Garrant, “so we had to rescore everything, but finally, MTV put up the money to rescore it, and I guess it’s coming out.”

How generous of MTV! They’ll easily make all their money back on this one. Blah…gotta love legalities.

Cook is sorry – Brinkley still workin’ out with Norris


Peter Cook is sorry and is gradually working up to the levels of Botox enjoyed by his wife.

Here’s a tissue for your issue, pal. Peter Cook, the big famous architect who got famous for marrying Christie Brinkley has announced that he’s sorry for a fling he had 10 years ago with a 19 year old girl. Yeah OK, so according to this story, a month after he broke it off with this girl, he got engaged to Brinkley. No harm, no foul, people! Consider it as the dude just having his last jollies before locking up the bait and tackle until he got divorced. Pshaw, this happens all the time…

Anyway, Cook sez:

“I love my wife. I have loved her since the day I met her. Please … I love her,” Cook told New York Post columnist Cindy Adams via his lawyer, Norman Sheresky. “For a lifetime, I’ve tried to prove how much I love her. This is an aberration. I’m sorry. I’m contrite. I’m stupid. Foolish. No excuse.”

Are you really sorry, Peter? Or are you just worried that Chuck Norris is gonna take your baby away for good and you’ll be forgotten again? Oh, to not have a public spotlight to constantly live within. That must suck.

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