Year: 2006 (Page 43 of 228)

Bad Idea Jeans launches new line of tattoos

Seriously, guys: If you’re wack enough to put a tattoo of some so-called rock star all over your entire back…could you at least make sure it’s a star of higher caliber than Adam freaking Duritz?! Have we no standards left?

I mean, honestly, if you’re not afraid of scaring children on the beach with the vision of Adam’s bloated, disembodied, dreadlocked head floating away from them every time you turn your back…you might as well just go whole hog and take a page out of Steve-O’s book:

But at least Steve-O’s is intended to garner laughs, whereas yours will all be accidental. See the difference?

Let’s be clear: You’re allowed to like Counting Crows. You’re allowed to buy all of their CDs, and listen to them as often as you want. You can wear their t-shirts, and put their posters up in your bedroom, and spend all of your spare cash on tickets to watch them in concert. You can even believe, deep down inside, that Adam Duritz is a hip, cool, deeply attractive man. You’re just not advised to ink his face all over your latissimus dorsi. Got it?

Okay, then. No more needles for you, mister! Friends don’t let friends desecrate their bodies with images of whiny, faded 90’s alt-rock artists…no matter how much you might want the orderlies giving you that sponge bath in the nursing home forty years from now to wonder why you put a giant Troll doll in the middle of your back.

It’s just not worth it. Trust us on this.

Donna Martin ovulates!

Tori Spelling is expecting a child with her new husband, Dean McDermott. Spelling and McDermott are reportedly thrilled to announce their news, as it provides a substantial bright spot in the wake of her father Aaron’s passing and her mother’s inequitable division of the Spelling estate’s assets.

While Tori is saddened that her father will never get to meet his new grandchild, she consoles herself with the knowledge that the man who cast his daughter as the staunchly virginal Donna Martin also died before ever receiving incontrovertible proof that she had actually had sex with anyone.

TV DVD QT, Vol. 2

Here we are, back again, with another bunch of shows…

The Facts of Life: The Complete Third Season – Fortunately, the show’s theme song sums itself up handily: you take the good, you take the bad, you take them both, and there you have…“The Facts of Life.” Except that instead of “good” and “bad,” you’ll want to substitute “cheesy fun” and “occasionally excruciating dialogue.” It ruins the flow of the song, but it’s far more accurate, I can assure you. By this time, the series had settled into its primary five cast members: Mrs. Garrett and her four favorite girls, Blair, Natalie, Tootie, and Jo. Ah, sweet Jo…I had such a crush on you. That must be why I recognize just about every episode here. That’s right, I watched “The Facts of Life.” You wanna make something of it…? Better you should complain about the total lack of special features on this set than my taste in television circa the mid-’80s.

Blue Thunder: The Complete Series – Did the world really need a series based on the Roy Scheider film about a hi-tech police helicopter? Well, considering that a fair amount of stock footage was recycled from the film and that, instead of Scheider, the series starred Dana Carvey, Dick Butkis, and Bubba Smith, I’d say, no, it did not…which would probably explain why it only lasted eleven episodes. Not even a cool theme song and James Farentino in the lead role of Frank Chaney…in no way to be confused with Scheider’s character of Frank Murphy, of course…could save this show from a quick demise. In a nutshell, it’s no “Airwolf.”

Three’s Company: Season Eight – Otherwise known as the last season of everyone’s favorite farce…and I’m sure you’ll be as shocked as I was to discover that there are a fair amount of misunderstandings and ensuing wacky hijinks contained within the plots of these 21 episodes. Only diehard fans will have stuck around for all eight seasons of the series, but the special features – bloopers, reminiscences of John Ritter, and the 30th anniversary special – will thrill that particular demographic to no end.

That ‘70s Show: Season Five – Hey, everybody! Donna and Eric are back together! Some would say the funniest thing about this season is that every single episode is named after a Led Zeppelin song (if you don’t believe me, check out the official episode guide and see for yourself ), but I love this show. It’s a great ensemble. The special features on these sets, however, have dropped off dramatically since the show went off the air; there’s not even a single audio commentary! But on the other hand, Donna wears a Catholic school uniform for most of the season, so, to come full circle, let us return to the “Facts of Life” theme song. You take the good, you take the bad…

Fish biscuits: they do a body good.

Another week, another disappointing episode. I’m sick of complaining about the ups-and-downs of each season, though (since I know the writers will surely make up for it in the end), so I’ll get right to the commentary. Tonight’s flashback was for Jin and Sun, and aside from the usual behind-the-back secrecies, nothing new was disclosed. Oh, except for the fact that Sun was sleeping with that bald Asian dude (Jae) from last season. And seeing as how they’ve only been on the island for three months, it’s still possible that it could be his baby. Not that it matters. After Jin was sent to kill him by Sun’s father, he decided just to scare him into leaving the country. Of course, Jae didn’t take too kindly to the threat, and instead chose to leap from the building to his death. Nice.

Back in present day, Sun and Jin are still hanging out with Sayid on the sailboat, awaiting their rendezvous with Jack and Co. When Sayid notices track marks on a nearby island, however, he plans an ambush on the Others. Unfortunately, it doesn’t exactly go according to plan, and while Sun is temporarily kidnapped (along with the boat), she manages to get out alive. On a side note, it’s good to see Jin finally taking a more aggressive approach to life on the island. He’s obviously capable of being a physical threat, and Daniel Dae Kim has proven himself a capable actor. Just let the guy learn some damn English so he can go places without needing Sun around to translate.

Meanwhile, the Others have put Kate and Sawyer to work breaking up large rocks. There doesn’t seem to be any discernible reason as to why they’re doing this, but some annoying guy says that he’ll shoot them if they don’t. Okay… But seriously, don’t any of these people realize that the Others have built their “empire” based on empty threats? They’re not going to kill you. If they wanted you dead, they would’ve done it months ago when you began poking your nose in places that weren’t yours. Either Sawyer knows this, or he just doesn’t care anymore, because he managed to make a pretty successful play for control by beating up a couple of the goons and stealing a rifle. He must’ve forgot that Kate was with him, though, because she always manages to botch up a good coup d’etat by getting in the way. Oh well, at least he knows all of their strengths and weaknesses now; except the fact they’re watching them via surveillance cameras.

And while I wasn’t at all upset that Kate and Sawyer were given more to do this week, I absolutely hated seeing Jack again. I understand that he’s the main character and all, but the next time you pick a main protagonist, could you please (please) make him a little smarter? I mean, really, how many times are you gonna call Henry Gale’s bluff (I just can’t get use to calling him Ben) before you finally just give in? He knows everything about you. Everything. And no, we don’t know why just yet, but I’m sure the writers will be ready to tell us as soon as they’ve figured it out themselves. Any more questions?

And finally, a new character alert: Paula Malcomson (Trixie of “Deadwood” fame) made her first appearance on the show tonight as Colleen, a tough-girl Other who was shot by Sun on the boat. It was just a gut shot, though, so I’m confident that she’ll be back. Then again, we’ve seen plenty of other characters die the same way…

Youngest Best Actress nominee ever becomes youngest pregnant nominee

Actress Keisha Castle-Hughes, nominated for an Academy Award at the age of 13 for her lead role as a spunky Maori tribe member in 2002’s “Whale Rider,” recently announced that she is expecting a child this spring.

The now-16-year-old actress is looking forward to raising the baby with her 19-year-old boyfriend, Bradley Hull, a New Zealand-area actor whose interests include fishing, windsurfing, and statutory rape.

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