Year: 2006 (Page 221 of 228)

Do we really need another thinly-veiled celebrity autobiography?

January 10, 2006 /

Let’s play a game. See if you can guess which former child star has a “novel” coming out this spring, based on this excerpt that might (but, well, doesn’t, as far as we know) appear in his or her work of “fiction”:

“So then, after doing a hilarious John Hughes comedy about a guy named Bug trying to date-rape my sister, I spent two hours beating the shit out of a couple of imbeciles at Christmastime. Then I got killed onscreen by a bunch of wussy bees, but it was okay, because Michael Jackson made me the godparent to his first child–which was totally conceived the natural way and didn’t involve lots of scientists with tubes and stuff. Then, when I was seventeen, I figured it was high time I got married.”

That’s right, book club fans: Macaulay Culkin has a word processor, and he’s not afraid to use it! He’s working out his Daddy issues (just like Premium Hollywood’s official celebrity mascot, Lindsay Lohan, does on her new album), and he doesn’t care who knows about it.

Oh well. At least he wrote the damn thing himself (we think), instead of just taking credit for a ghostwriter’s work like Nicole Richie appears to have done.

Actors, News

Busted!

January 10, 2006 /

Well it’s that time of year again. The Smoking Gun has posted its top mug shots of 2005. You’ll find a few big names in there, but man oh man, does that #1 spot take the cake. Maybe all these lesser-knowns can have some exciting Lifetime Television movies made from their struggles. Hell, I’d pay for a full ticket for guy number one’s movie alone.

Humor, News

But does he model Aquaman Underoos?

January 10, 2006 /

The Spotlight Kid has been holding out on us. Entertainment Weekly’s Popwatch blog posted this link to a photo of the WB’s new Aquaman, Will Toale, apparently captured in a candid moment while shopping for produce shirtless, as most men are known to do. Toale’s qualifications for the Aquaman role have thus been revealed, in the form of a well-tanned, washboard stomach.

Bearing limited acting credentials, Toale is best known for his modeling work–specifically underwear modeling, the better to show off his abs of steel. Pity, then, that he must cover them up for his new role, and instead wear the infinitely less flattering orange-and-green wetsuit. Unless of course hiding his remarkable abs is essential to maintaining Aquaman’s anonymity, much like Clark Kent’s dorky glasses?

Either way, rest assured that the Aquaman writers will find plenty of excuses for Aquaman’s alter ego, Arthur Curry, to whip his shirt off at the drop of a hat, the better to keep those female teenage viewers drooling. Toale clearly has a bright future ahead of him, just like his brothers-in-arms, former underwear models Mark Wahlberg and Antonio Sabato Jr….or at least that dude who played Tarzan a couple years back.

Actors, News, TV

DVD shuffle: 01/10/06

January 10, 2006 /

Out on DVD this week:

1) Transporter 2 – RENT: Fans of Jason Statham will definitely want to check out the sequel to his U.S. breakout film, but it’s nothing worth owning. The special features are brief and not very interesting, but it’s an enjoyable popcorn flick perfectg for a rainy day.

2) Hustle & Flow – BUY: Terrence Howard proves that he’s the next Denzel Washington with his performance in this Sundance favorite, while the DVD offers tons of behind-the-scenes material that is actually worth watching.

3) Red Eye – RENT: I never got a chance to see Wes Craven’s latest entry, but fellow Bullz-Eye critic David Medsker gave it rave reviews and I can’t help but trust his opinion.

4) The Constant Gardnener – RENT: Yet another political thriller that’s not all that thrilling, but it’s a good story nonetheless.

Also out on DVD this week are re-releases of “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off,” “Dead Poets Society,” “Good Morning Vietnam,” and “The Return of the Pink Panther.” And availble now in stores are the latest installments of the Disney Treasures rollout that includes volume two of “The Chronological Donald,” “Disney Rarities,” and “The Adventures of Spin & Marty.” These two disc sets are perfect for kids and any fan of Disney’s early work.

Movie DVDs, Movies, Reviews

Howard Stern debut

January 9, 2006 /

I caught 20 minutes of Howard’s first broadcast on Sirius and it was friggin’ hilarious (click here for a complete overview of the first show). George Takei (of Star Trek fame) was on board as the show’s new announcer, so Howard and the gang had lots of fun with the whole gay theme.

I almost drove my car off the road when they started playing the Pat O’Brien tape. Of course it was uncensored, which took the bit to a whole new level. Then they started playing song parodies (like Prince’s “Let’s Go Crazy”) with O’Brien’s ridiculous statements in the background. Priceless.

One blog counted 77 f-bombs from Howard. Howard claims he doesn’t want to rely too heavily on profanity, pointing out that it gets boring if used too often. My first impression is that he’s striking a good balance, and the O’Brien tape is a great example of content that works much better in an uncensored setting.

I’m glad he’s back.

Humor, New Media, News

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