Don’t you want to play whack-a-mole with this Weasel?

Yep, it’s true. According to Odessa police, as reported by TMZ.com, Pauly’s on-stage assault in the Lone Star State was just a hoax, presumably engineered to glean some much-needed publicity for a comedian who, let’s face it, has never actually been funny:

The Odessa, Texas Police Department claims that an officer “had met with Mr. Shore prior to his set, and was asked to participate in the skit. The officer stated that the skit went as designed and that Shore was not injured in the designed skit.”

While of course I’m disappointed to have been hoodwinked by The Weasel, of all people, this new revelation just makes the story all the stranger. What did Pauly hope to accomplish with his little prank? And did he really think no one would find out?

Don’t know, don’t care. All I know is that, intentionally or otherwise, Pauly has now created a deep-seated desire among people the world over to see someone land a giant ham-hock fist squarely in his face. The people will not rest until they get their due. Who will rise to the challenge?