Tag: America’s Next Top Model (Page 2 of 2)

Labor Pains

After failing to make the jump from kid star to adult actress (not to mention her two-year stint as every gossip magazines’ favorite drunken/slutty/anorexic/lesbian celebrity), “Labor Pains” was supposed to be Lindsay Lohan’s grand return to the big screen. Things didn’t go quite the way they were supposed to, however, and instead of getting a proper theatrical release, the film was dumped onto ABC Family as their movie of the week. Granted, “Labor Pains” is very much movie-of-the-week material, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t any good. Lohan stars as Thea, a twentysomething college drop-up working as a secretary at a small-time publishing company. When her boss (Chris Parnell) threatens to fire her after she accidentally harms his canine companion, Thea pretends to be pregnant in order to keep her job. What follows is exactly the kind of formulaic comedy that you’d expect just from looking at the poster, but despite its shortcomings, it’s still far more entertaining than your average made-for-TV movie. Her messy private life aside, Lohan is always fun to watch, and this time around, she gets invaluable support from comedy vets like Parnell and Cheryl Hines. It might not be for everyone, but “Labor Pains” is sure to find an audience as a great alternative to “America’s Next Top Model” reruns.

Click to buy “Labor Pains”

The CW: The Fall Schedule

Although I’m as cautiously amused about the idea of a “Melrose Place” reboot as I was with “90210” last year, and I’m sure my “Twilight”-loving wife will be into the network’s new Thursday night drama, I really only have one observation to make about The CW’s fall schedule: instead of pairing “Smallville” with a third season of “Reaper,” they’ve canceled the latter and are wasting an hour of their schedule re-running the episode of “America’s Next Top Model” from earlier in the week.

Are you kidding me?

Okay, that’s all I’ve got. I’m just really pissed off about that and needed to get it out of my system. Read on to see what else The CW has in stores for “the kids” this season…


8:00 PM – Gossip Girl
9:00 PM – One Tree Hill


8:00 PM – 90210
9:00 PM – Melrose Place

In an elegant Spanish-style apartment building in the trendy Melrose neighborhood of Los Angeles, a diverse group of 20-somethings have formed a close-knit surrogate family. Sydney Andrews (Laura Leighton) is the landlady, still beautiful at 40, and a central figure in the lives of all her tenants, especially handsome and rebellious David Breck (Shaun Sipos). Sydney started an affair with David despite her turbulent history with his estranged father, Dr. Michael Mancini (Thomas Calabro). Both father and son learned through experience that Sydney was not above using blackmail to control people. Another tenant, high-powered publicist Ella Simms (Katie Cassidy), once considered Sydney her mentor, but their friendship was destroyed by betrayal, and Sydney threatened to evict Ella and ruin her career. Sydney also played a pivotal role in the career of Auggie Kirkpatrick (Colin Egglesfield). After they met at an AA meeting, she became Auggie’s sponsor and encouraged his dream to become a chef. Now a successful sous chef at the trendy restaurant Coal, Auggie has been avoiding Sydney since she began drinking again. The other tenants include Lauren Yung (Stephanie Jacobsen), a medical student in desperate need of money to pay her student loans, and Jonah Miller (Michael Rady), an aspiring filmmaker who has just proposed to his live-in girlfriend Riley Richmond (Jessica Lucas), a first-grade teacher. The newest tenant, 18-year-old Violet Foster (Ashlee Simpson-Wentz), has just arrived in LA with her own secret connection to Sydney. When a bloody body is found floating in the courtyard pool, David is the leading suspect. However, as the police are soon to discover, almost everyone living at Melrose Place had a reason to want the deceased out of the way.


8:00 PM – America’s Next Top Model
9:00 PM – The Beautiful Life

The life of a high-fashion model appears glamorous and sexy, but as every new model quickly learns, behind the beautiful façade is a world of insecurity and cutthroat competition. Two teenage models who are about to discover this world for themselves are Raina Collins (Sara Paxton), a stunning beauty with a secret past, and Chris Andrews (Benjamin Hollingsworth), a strikingly handsome Iowa farm boy. When Raina makes an unforgettable impression at a show introducing the new line from designer Zac Posen, she steals the spotlight from her friend Sonja (Mischa Barton). Sonja has been out of the country for mysterious reasons and is now desperate to reclaim her standing as the reigning supermodel. While Raina and Sonja live at the top of the fashion food chain, Chris is starting at the bottom, having just been discovered by agent Simon Lockridge (Dusan Dukic) of the Covet Modeling Agency, which is owned by former supermodel Claudia Foster (Elle Macpherson). At his first photo shoot, Chris’ inexperience almost derails his career until Raina comes to his rescue, showing him how to relax and work the camera. That afternoon, Raina brings Chris to the “models’ residence” where she lives along with other young hopefuls, including Marissa Delfina (Ashley Madekwe), Egan (Jordan Woolley), Issac (Corbin Bleu) and the current alpha-male-model known as Kai (Nico Tortorella). At an exclusive industry party that night, Chris is again impressed by Raina’s generosity when she steps aside to make sure Sonja lands a job that will resurrect her career. However, after an ugly scene with Simon, Chris is left to question whether he can survive in this world of dangerous excess and fleeting fame.

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CW renews six shows

Good news for fans of several CW shows.

The CW network has picked up six series to return in the fall: “Gossip Girl,” “One Tree Hill, “90210,” the Thursday combo of “Smallville” and “Supernatural” and the reality hit “America’s Next Top Model,” which has been green-lighted for its 13th and 14th seasons.

The ninth-season renewal for “Smallville” came after producing studio Warner Bros TV was able to secure a new deal with star Tom Welling.

The last couple seasons of “Supernatural” have been great, and “Smallville” has been really strong this year as well, so I’m happy to see that both will be returning for another season. The same goes for “Gossip Girl,” which is a guilty pleasure.

There are a few other CW shows that are still in limbo…

Awaiting a decision regarding its fate is freshman drama “Privileged,” which has developed a strong fan base but has been a modest ratings performer.

Renewal chances are slim at best for “Reaper,” whose second season begins Tuesday, and for the CW’s only two remaining comedy series, “The Game” and “Everybody Hates Chris,” since the network has abandoned the genre.

I gave up on “Privileged” after a couple of episodes because the two daughters were pretty annoying. The show’s star — Joanna Garcia — is charming, so I’m not surprised that the show has developed a strong fan base. “Reaper” isn’t getting much help from its network, but it still needs to perform well in its second season to have a shot at renewal.

Old Show, New Season: “America’s Next Top Model”

Anyone with a Y-chromosome who’s ever watched “America’s Next Top Model” will quickly testify that there are always at least fourteen good reasons to watch the series. Granted, you might need to keep a finger on the mute button at all times, but, still, over the course of the show’s previous ten seasons, the eye candy on display has generally been quite spectacular, and the status quo remains unchanged for Season 11 (premiering on Sept. 3rd at 8 PM), as you can see below:

I’ve never actually sat through a full episode of the series, but my mother-in-law is such a huge fan of the show that, when the screener for the Season 11 premiere arrived, I knew it would make her happy if we watched it when she came over to our house for dinner. As I watched the events unfold on the screen, my jaw kept dropping progressively lower with each passing moment, not because of the gorgeous women filing past the camera (though, certainly, the majority of them were indeed quite attractive) but, rather, because of the complete stupidity of the sci-fi scenario through which hostess Tyra Banks decide to approach the premiere episode.

Using only the cheapest special effects and most ridiculous wigs and costumes, the models were welcomed to The Top Model Institute of Technology, a top-secret, highly-classified building “where we build better models.” Seriously, to use the word “retarded” as a descriptor is to cause insult to the mentally handicapped, so let’s stick with a phrase like “stupid as hell” instead, shall we? One of the contestants makes the comment that she’s excited by this concept because she’s a big fan of “2001: A Space Odyssey,” but whatever she says after that is immediately blocked out by all the noise being made by the corpses of Stanley Kubrick and Arthur C. Clarke turning over in their respective graves. You may feel that the height of stupidity has been reached when one of the models feigns fascination with a piece of technology called the Glam-inator 11.0, asking in a shocked tone, “They got technology like that? Are we gonna come back like us, or are we gonna be transformed into a robot or something?” You would be wrong to do so, however, as the Glam-inator promptly overloads and spits out Tyra Banks, dressed in a costume straight out of “My Living Doll,” moving back and forth stiffly, and spitting out excruciating dialogue in a staccato tone because she’s – wait for it – the Tyra-Bot.

“I’m not looking for an ANTM as in America’s Next Top Martian,” says Banks. “I’m looking for America’s Next Top what…?” And when the models reply in unison with the appropriate answer, she responds in her best robot voice, “I’m having a…little bit of a…technical difficulty. I didn’t hear you.”

I believe it was at this point when I turned to my mother-in-law and said, “Really? This is the show that you’ve been watching with such dedication since it first came on the air…?”

“I swear to God,” she assured me, “it has never been this cheesy before. Never. This is awful. This is just…stupid.”

Boy, is it.

The big thing that’s going to bring in curious viewers this time around is the decision to include a trans-gender contestant in the bunch. The contestant’s name is Isis , and…look, I’ve gotta tell ya: no matter what gender she may be, she’s not consistently attractive (she’s definitely someone who needs make-up to be model-worthy), and her lanky figure gives her a really weird stride on the runway. Tyra and company seem to really like her, though, so I think there’s every reason to believe that Isis will be kept around for the long haul, but on the whole, here’s the contestant that I’m rooting for:

Her name is Analeigh Tipton, a 19-year-old from Sacramento, California, who’s a super-cute hippie chick. Whether or not she’ll make it to the end of the contest, I have no idea…and I wouldn’t begin to pretend that I’ll be tuning in every week to find out.

I’ll probably ask my mother-in-law how she’s doing, though.

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