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AskMen’s Great Male Survey names the summer’s best movie: “None.”

It’s that time of year again, fellas — yes, AskMen.com has compiled the data for its annual Great Male Survey, crunched the numbers, and published the results. If you want to put your finger on the pulse of what dudes are thinking, look no further — and if you’ve been feeling like this year’s crop of summer blockbusters is one of the least exciting to come out of Hollywood in recent memory, you can at least take solace in the knowledge that most of the guys who responded to the survey agree with you. Yes, it’s sad but true: When asked to name the movie of the summer so far, 39 percent of respondents answered “None.” Here’s how it all broke down:

Q. What has been the best summer movie of 2009 to date?
39% – None
28% – Star Trek
21% – Transformers II
08% – X-Men Origins: Wolverine
04% – Terminator Salvation

Not exactly good news for the folks who depend on cash registers ringing at the cineplex — and it doesn’t get any better for the rest of the summer, either. When asked to identify the film they were most eagerly anticipating, 26 percent of respondents answered “Public Enemies,” whose generally lukewarm reviews and good-but-not-great box office returns have been something of a letdown for Universal. In second place, with 22 percent? That bastard “None.”

Q. Which forthcoming summer 2009 movie are you most looking forward to?
26% – Public Enemies
22% – None
18% – Bruno
18% – G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra
16% – Inglourious Basterds

So guys aren’t happy with what has been in theaters this summer, and they aren’t happy about what’s going to be in theaters — so where’s the silver lining for Hollywood? Well, if you’re in the network business, or worried about warding off the TV ratings drift toward streaming Web content, you’ll be happy to know that although 75 percent of respondents listed their computer monitor as the screen they spend the most time in front of, 49 percent of them still watch their favorite TV series the old-fashioned way: Episode by episode, as it’s broadcast live. You might be hearing about TiVo, Hulu, and TV on DVD all the time, but if the jump away from live TV is happening, it’s occurring more slowly than you might think.

The worst news, as it turns out, is for the PR flacks that work for Barack Obama and Paris Hilton — the male and female celebs that respondents named as the public figures they’re most tired of hearing about (although, to be fair, Obama tied with — you guessed it — “None”). Overexposure, plain old dislike, or blind button pushing? You decide — and make sure you check out the rest of the Great Male Survey to see what guys are thinking about cars, sports, and entertainment!

Top Chef Masters: more mutual respect

Last night on Bravo was the final preliminary round of “Top Chef Masters,” and next week begins the finals, in which one chef will be voted off each week until someone is crowned Top Chef Master. And last night, more so than in previous episodes, there was a lot of love and mutual respect going on between the contestants…..Jonathan Waxman of New York City, better known as the dude who trained Bobby Flay; Roy Yamaguchi of Honolulu; Michael Cimarusti of Los Angeles; and Art Smith of Chicago (better known as Oprah’s chef). You could already sense that this would be a very competitive round, and it was.

Their quick fire challenge was to create a dish with just $20 and the use of a single aisle at a grocery store, drawn randomly. Jonathan drew the aisle with canned veggies and dried beans, and wound up making a red pepper and lentil salad. Art had the rice aisle and made a risotto with crispy rice salad. Michael had the baking aisle and made a chocolate parfait, and Roy had the pasta aisle and made an Asian style spaghetti with an egg on top. The judges for this were Whole Foods employees, and they liked just about all of the dishes, but loved the chocolate parfait the most…..even after Michael claimed to not be much of a dessert expert. So Michael wound up with 5 stars, Art 4.5 stars, Roy 4, and Jonathan 3.5…all of which would go toward their final score.

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In which I arrive at Comic-Con

After a couple of days getting crap out of the way, packing, and the most crowded Amtrak train I’ve ever seen (though it’s still a highly civilized way to travel), I’m a bit out of it. Also, with the “Industry Lounge” not yet open, I’ve got no place to blog with access to a outlet, and my power is 55% and rapidly dwindling…so let me just say that — yeah, it’s a zoo here.

That also means that tonight, it’s just quick-ass short astericky stuff. And no pics either. Sorry.

* Via Anne Thompson @ AICN. 250 “very lucky” fans will get to see “Inglourious Basterds” here after all. And, as per Ms. Thompson, after “Spiderman 4,” Sam Raimi may do a movie version of the “World of Warcraft” game. If anyone can make the first good video game-derived movie, it would be Raimi.

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Some travelling music…

Just a few quick thoughts to keep you busy as I make my way on the long, long journey from Orange County to San Diego for Comic-Con (well, it can feel long).

* Lars von Trier is enjoying the hub-bub around “Antichrist” (soon to have it’s second coming). What part of “provocateur” didn’t we understand?

* Karina has only one thing she’ll miss about the con. (Warning — don’t click while eating unless you find a fake ultra-bloodied Lloyd Kaufman palatable.)

* Also from THR: Michael Jackson’s flirtations with filmmaking. The big surprise — it could have been weirder. Even his meeting with Mel Gibson was apparently not incredibly strange, though Mel hugged a pillow.

* I’ve been reading articles like this for decades. The fact that they’re more or less true doesn’t make them less their inaccuracies/shallowness less annoying. Women have been getting more interested in geek stuff for a very long time. That’s a good thing. Personally, I didn’t notice a humongous “Twilight” contingent last year, but perhaps I’m sheltered.

* And now a clip that will be running through my mind as I approach the convention center.

I’ve never been good at avoiding silly places, obviously.

Beau Geste

William Wellman’s 1939 hit is the second and best-known version of the frequently filmed adventure novel by Percival Christopher Wren. This 1939 action not-quite-classic features superstar Gary Cooper (“High Noon”) and then-rising stars Ray Miland (“The Lost Weekend”) and Robert Preston (“The Music Man”) as three English brothers and best pals who flee their ancestral home in the wake of the mysterious theft of an extremely valuable emerald. Joining the infamously torturous French Foreign Legion, the brothers Geste encounter the brutal, greedy, thoroughly villainous but entirely courageous Sgt. Markoff (Brian Donleavy), who quickly hears of the stolen jewel and becomes determined to re-steal it for himself between attacks by Arab groups who’d prefer Frenchie goes home.

Unlike other classic-era tales of imperialist derring-do, “Beau Geste” doesn’t go out of its way to glamorize or morally justify the work of the Legion. At the same time, the mystery of the stolen jewel takes the focus away from the setting and becomes a kind of odd distraction. Ironically made in the same year as two similar but superior adventures, George Stevens’ comedic “Gunga Din” and Zoltan Korda’s wondrous, propagandistic “Four Feathers,” “Beau Geste” has been beautifully restored to its black and white glory and is worth seeing for its lucid direction, a moving finale, ans the outstanding cast. Character actor Brian Donleavy’s evil-but-admirable Markoff pretty much walks away with the film. It’s a savagely honest portrait of pure selfish survival instinct that makes this tale of brotherly love and sacrifice work, more or less.

Click to buy “Beau Geste”

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