Category: Rescue Me (Page 3 of 5)

Following two weeks of excellent, best-of worthy material, the writing team behind “Rescue Me” is going to have a helluva time outdoing themselves any time soon. Tonight’s episode is proof of that. After opening with a killer scene involving the Ladder 62 crew responding to an apartment fire (caused by a heat lamp burning the tenant’s marijuana plants) and watching Garrity and Probie get high off the fumes, the rest of the hour was littered with nothing more than a few slow-progressing subplots to help pass the time.

For one, Probie’s haphazard homosexual experiment is officially out of the bag, and while most of the guys aren’t exactly sure how to take it, Tommy feigns empathy in order to keep his crew together. It’s not going to be as easy as he thinks, however, with Franco taking the lieutenant’s exam and Lou contemplating moving down to Florida to work for his brother’s boating company. Also, now that Garrity is marrying Maggie, Tommy can’t stand hanging out with the guy because he constantly refers to him as his brother; even going so far as to change his firefighter trench coat to read “Gavin.” To counter this, Sheila pleads Tommy to quit and move away with her to a house on the beach, using her widow money from 9/11 as a means of income. Apparently, she’s managed to save up over $1 million (thank you, interest) just by letting the cash sit in the bank for five years.

This probably isn’t going to happen – since no firefighters means no show – but I’m still rooting for Sheila to win him over in the end. This might be a little easier now that Tommy’s discovered Janet is pregnant (courtesy of older brother Johnny), unless, of course, it’s his baby, which we all know is going to be the case. Oh well, at least the show had a few good weeks to deliver before the wheels on this train wreck were set into motion.

Probie’s a hero. At least for one week, though the previews for the next episode don’t look as promising. Still, not only did he manage to courageously rescue two trapped firefighters within the opening minutes of the show, but he also won the firehouse $15,000 by accidentally betting the wrong horse from Jerry’s “hot tip.” It’s good to see the newbie getting some face time after playing a background character in the first half of the season. Of course, it’s only going to get worse from here if he really is gay. Just look at the way Jerry treats his gay son, and that’s his own blood. And to add to everything else, Tommy finds out that Probie has put in for a transfer. Bad time, really, since he’s the top dog in the firehouse until the next big rescue.

He’s not the only one making some changes, either. After uncovering a two-page news spread about Con Artist Hooker Girl getting nabbed by the cops for dealing drugs, Lou has an epiphany: treat my body better and enjoy life. And in celebration of his Depression Emancipation, Lou’s decided to start a whole new-age health program that includes yoga classes with an instructor named (get this) Epiphany. Oh, and did I mention Sean and Maggie are getting married? Yeah, well, he was pretty much tricked into proposing to her, but something tells me this isn’t going to last. I mean, does Maggie really look like the kind of girl that wants to settle down anytime soon?

Meanwhile, Uncle Teddy actually does get married to Psycho Prison Chick (she has a name now, and it’s Ellie), and Franco picks up a hot chick (with brains, too) at the bar. Unfortunately, while it’s nice to see the guy finally moving on after the whole Alicia disaster, shouldn’t he be more worried about when he’s going to see his daughter again? This is probably something they should be addressing in the near future, if not already. Maybe they’re just waiting for him to get a little closer to this new girl, and then they can use that against him as a means of forcing her out of his life. Hey, we’ve seen it happen before.

So, it’s official: Sheila is crazy. After spying on Tommy during his night out with Angie, Sheila surprises him at his apartment with a late night dinner. When asked about his date, however, Tommy lies through his teeth. In response to his little white lie, Sheila drugs him (via a cranberry and seltzer) and then rapes him. Oh, and she also smashes up the place to make it look like Tommy got drunk and went wild. Wow. Now that’s commitment. Unfortunately, I don’t think it’s really going to help her cause. Tommy is still totally into Angie, and until she drops him, Sheila’s got no shot at happiness.

Tommy, meanwhile, is having the night of his life. He’s finally bagged a date with Angie, and along with getting some much needed revenge on Johnny (which involved showing up with his ex at an NYPD dinner function), also managed to screw her. A golden star to whoever wrote that particular scene. I could watch Marissa Tomei walk around in lingerie all day long. Of course, Tommy’s unusually long-lasting boner ruins the night and he’s sent home to deal with the female reincarnation of Norman Bates.

The rest of the guys didn’t much screen time this week. Franco’s missing daughter subplot has mysteriously disappeared – as if it’s not even that important – and Probie’s homosexual tendencies are quickly swept under the carpet when a hot bar girl lures him back over to the home team. Tommy’s sister, Maggie, also returns looking to make amends with Garrity, and though she wants to be his girlfriend again, it doesn’t take long for Garrity to mess it up by getting sprayed with mace by a nerdy biker. Of course, this only makes for a hilarious little scene of him stumbling around the firehouse the next day.

Equally as funny is the way that Tommy and Franco help Jerry to get the money that’s owed to him down at the bar. Apparently, this bar owner guy (Birdie, I believe) is a giant prick, so while he’s working alongside Jerry to close down for the night, Tommy calls in a favor and has his Jeep hung from a truck with a crane attacked. Oh, and while I’m talking about tonight’s comedic moments, how about Lou’s night out with Tommy’s two daughters?

“Let me finish my beer, they don’t grow on trees, you know.” Priceless.