Oh me, oh my. The Oscar ratings dropped 8 percent from last year. Guess who wasn’t watching them? That’s right, ME! Instead, we were enjoying watching episodes of “The X-Files,” “Queer As Folk,” and of course The Wiggles on DVD. None of the movies I saw (save for that shitty Crash) got nominated, but when do they ever, so why could I care less to watch a big ceremonial show devoted to all the junk I didn’t see? Not even Jon Stewart hosting the debacle could lure me in. I think the last time I watched the Oscars straight through was ’95 or ’96 in someone’s dorm room. Man we must’ve been bored that night.
Category: News (Page 375 of 401)
For anyone wondering how Phoebe Cates has been spending her time ever since jump-starting a million teenage fantasies back in “Fast Times at Ridgemont High,” she now keeps herself busy running her own boutique, reassuring hubby Kevin Kline that he’s not a washed-up has-been who immediately squandered away all his Oscar-laden promise, and busting criminals just like one of New York’s finest.
When a friend’s apartment was broken into, the items stolen included a $250 gift certificate to Cates’s boutique…which the savvy criminals attempted to use the very next day. Having been alerted to the theft, Cates’s store manager phoned Phoebe, who instructed her to stall the thieves (one of whom, incidentally, claimed he “couldn’t remember” the name of the person who gave him the gift card…even though he also claimed that person was his mother!) long enough for the authorities to arrive. Justice was served, and the friend’s stolen credit cards were also recovered.
Hats off, Pheebs! Job well done. Casting agents need look no further for their star for the inevitable big-screen extravaganza, “Crime Dog McGruff: The Movie.”
Based on Sunday’s estimates:
1) Tyler Perry’s Madea’s Family Reunion: $13 million ($48 million, second week)
Looks as though that clothing line of female fat suits for black men that Keenan Thompson was pimping on “SNL” wasn’t that much of a stretch after all. And is it just me, or is Finesse Mitchell a little too convincing as a woman?
2) 16 Blocks: $11.6 million (first week)
At least Bruce Willis didn’t look at Mos Def and say, “I’m too old for this shit.”
3) Eight Below: $10.2 million ($58.7 million, third week)
The joke, of course, is that Paul Walker’s agent will use the box office of this movie as an example of his client’s star power. But we all know that everyone’s going to see Jason Biggs.
4) Ultraviolet: $9 million (first week)
Shocker: Milla Jovovich’s latest movie wasn’t screened for critics. Just like the last four.
5) Aquamarine: $7.5 million (first week)
If this really isn’t the “Teen Splash” that it appears to be, please let us know.
“Crash“?
Well, I don’t think anybody saw that one coming, including the cast of the film, who were jumping out of their seats in complete amazement last night when presenter Jack Nicholson read the name off the envelope. I had previously predicted that if there was one film that could upset frontrunner “Brokeback Mountain” for the prize, it would be the Paul Haggis-directed drama, but it was still a shocker when it happened. Since Ang Lee had won Best Director honors only minutes before the announcement of Best Picture, it seemed like That Gay Cowboy Movie had it in the bag. Perhaps the Academy chose “Crash” over “Brokeback” for its incredible ensemble cast, because that’s the only leg up that the former had on Lee’s drama.
The rest of the night went down exactly as expected, with Philip Seymour Hoffman picking up the award for Best Actor in “Capote” and Reese Witherspoon winning the Best Actress award for “Walk the Line.” The complete list of winners in all of the major categories are as follows:
Best Picture – Crash
Best Director – Ang Lee (“Brokeback Mountain”)
Best Actor – Philip Seymour Hoffman (“Capote”)
Best Actress – Reese Witherspoon (“Walk the Line”)
Best Supporting Actor – George Clooney (“Syriana“)
Best Supporting Actress – Rachel Weisz (“The Constant Gardener“)
Best Original Screenplay – “Crash”
Best Adapted Screenplay – “Brokeback Mountain”
Best Documentary – “March of the Penguins”
Best Animated Feature – “Wallace & Gromit and the Curse of the Were-Rabbit”
Or not. Looks like Vinnie Barbarino has been tapped to play the role of “Edna” in the latest go ’round of Hairspray. Something tells me this won’t reignite Travolta’s career, which has pretty much been in a free fall after the one-two punch of “Pulp Fiction” and “Get Shorty” (the decline started quickly thereafter with “Broken Arrow”). I think it’s time for a “Welcome Back, Kotter” flick with Ron Palillo screaming back into the spotlight as a modern and hot Horshack!
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