Ah yes, From Justin to Kelly, starring everyone’s favorite American idols Kelly Clarkson and Justin Guarini. Clarkson has since disavowed the project, but dammit, it’s one of those pieces of poo that you should sit down with and view while ingesting a few beers and tasty snacks. Clarkson’s always good eye candy, and Justin’s hair is too damn much! It’s true rock and roll, kids, and you know me likey that.
The plot is pointless. It’s Spring Break on Daytona Beach! Kelly’s workin’ in some dumpy-ass country bar dreaming of being a big time singer (more or less), and Justin and his buddies set up yearly parties and activities to help pay for their pad when school is in session. Of course, the two randomly bump into each other, but Kelly’s hussy southern belle bitch of a friend doesn’t think she’s party girl material for Justin and tries to sabotage their attempts at meeting over and over. Justin claims he’s not really a partying, multiple-sex partner kinda guy and really digs Kelly. See, I told you it was pointless.
And so are the songs! Man, during one slow tune, Justin and Kelly start singing telepathically to each other and then burst out into song. It’s beautiful. There’s also a cool scene later on in the movie where Justin has to play some sort of stupid hovercraft game in the ocean against a local yokel from Kelly’s hometown to prove his love for her! Then there’s also a shitty cover version of The Go-Gos “Vacation” playing over the opening credits as sung by Clarkson. Justin’s wild hairdo also gets wet twice!
It’s all too much and easy to see why Kelly scratched this one off her resume. But there’s enough so bad it’s good shit here to make it worth sitting through drunkenly at least once. Especially when the first musical number is nothing but an ode about getting it on sung by a beach full of horny kids all doing synchronized dance moves. What’s more, the DVD has two versions of the movie – the regular theatrical release and a longer one with two extra songs! I watched the longer one for maximum torture.
From Justin to Kelly was a fine ebay purchase for $1.99. With shipping and all it came to a little over three bucks. Anyway, we all know Kelly’s gone on to greater things, and Justin…well, his website is pretty bleak. Let’s just say he’s probably hoping for a sequel. Ah well, maybe he’ll get his own pinball game. That would be awesome.
