Category: Movies (Page 471 of 498)

Rapid Fire Rejects, Volume IV

I Love Your Work
The directorial debut of Adam Goldberg (one of my favorite B-list actors) isn’t nearly as promising as I would have hoped it would be. Incredibly experimental in tone, “I Love Your Work” studies the effect that fame has on celebrities through a fictional character (Giovanni Ribisi) who’s one of the biggest stars in cinema. The movie loses most of its interest during the constant flip-flopping of reality and fantasy, however, until eventually the audience can’t tell the difference between the two. Half-assed supporting performances by Franka Potente, Jason Lee, and Joshua Jackson make watching the film that much more disappointing. It’s not horrible, but you should definitely approach it with extreme caution.

Dark Kingdom: The Dragon King
Just what we need; another low budget fantasy film made specifically for the Sci-Fi Channel. And while I’m not against the basic cable channel producing their own silly epics, there’s really no need to release it on DVD unless it’s actually good. Chock full of B-movie actors like Krisanna Loken (appearing in her third fantasy film of the year) and Julian “Warlock” Sands, not to mention a whole mess of cheesy sound effects and slo-mo action sequences, “Dark Kingdom: The Dragon King” is yet another “LOTR” wannabe destined for the bargain bin.

Andre the Butcher
TH!NKFilm studios hit it big last year with the acquisition of the blockbuster documentary “Murderball,” so you can expect a whole slew of shitty films to follow its success into 2006. “Andre the Butcher” is such a film, offering the worst of indie horror in one short spin of the disc. Of course, the fact that porn superstar Ron Jeremy makes an appearance doesn’t bode well either, but it certainly adds to the absolute tackiness of the picture.

Box Office Roundup: Wooly bully

Based on Sunday’s estimates:

1) Ice Age: The Meltdown: $34.5 million ($116.4 million, second week)
Sure, it’s a drop of 50%, but it’s still $34.5 million.
2) The Benchwarmers: $20.5 million (first week)
It will be curious to see whose agent is the first to talk about their client “opening” a movie with a $20 million gross. But what’s really gross is the idea that Molly Sims would ever marry Rob Schneider.
3) Take the Lead: $12.7 million (first week)
We had an invitation to see this movie, but we decided to Take the Night Off.
4) Inside Man: $9.1 million ($66 million, third week)
To steal a recent joke from “The Daily Show,” Jodie Foster’s character is where boners go to die.
5) Lucky Number Slevin: $7.1 million (first week)
The suits will blame the movie’s failure on the title. They should look at their total lack of promotional effort, instead.

Forget all of these: go see “Thank You for Smoking” instead. Just try to resist the urge to stick knitting needles in your eye sockets when Katie Holmes is onscreen.

Every good movie starts with a good script…

…and, then, that script is usually summarily ruined by a bunch of suits who think they know better than the guy who actually wrote it.

Fortunately, that doesn’t happen all the time, as the Writer’s Guild of America has proven with their selections of the “101 Greatest Screenplays.” Topping the list is “Casablanca,” and rounding it out is “Notorious,” the Alfred Hitchcock film. Somewhere in-between, you’ll find three Charlie Kaufman films…quite an accomplishment, given how recent all those films are…as well as some John Huston, some Woody Allen, and even my boy, Cameron Crowe, for “Jerry Maguire.” (I’d rather have seen “Almost Famous,” but what can you do?) It’s a bit premature, I think, to include “Sideways,” given how many thousands of movies could’ve made it into that spot, and “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind” showing up all the way at #24 seems pretty damned high, even if it WAS a really good movie. Still, there’s a lot of good stuff in there…

But, for the record, it says a hell of a lot about Hollywood…and speaks to the accuracy of my opening line…that, in the 1980s, the script to “Casablanca” was sent to readers at a number of major studios and production companies under its original title, “Everybody Comes To Rick’s.” Some readers recognized the script but most did not, and of those who didn’t, many complained that the script was “not good enough” to make a decent movie.

And, yet, they greenlighted “Police Academy 7: Mission to Moscow.”

Funny old world…

Why do all the best films get the least exposure?

If last week’s box office business is any indication, then the thriller/comedy “Lucky Number Slevin” should open somewhere in the bottom ten this weekend. That’s what happened to “Slither,” a far superior film when compared to the likes of “Ice Age: The Meltdown” and the other major breadwinners. This means that while “Take the Lead” and “Phat Girlz” (ye gods) probably won’t make a lot of change this weekend either, the latest Adam Sandler-produced “The Benchwarmers” will earn more money than it deserves. It’s not exactly fair, but since when has Hollywood treated the American public with any respect?

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