To commemorate the opening of “Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest,” we bring you this gem from our friends at Go Fug Yourself. A brief excerpt of the purported conversation between the lovely Ms. Knightley and her date appears below:
KEIRA KNIGHTLEY: So, I’ve just bought these pink amateur-stripper shoes and I’m simply dying to take them out on the town.
OILY ORLANDO BLOOM LOOKALIKE WHO COULD BE HER BOYFRIEND RUPERT BUT MAY ACTUALLY BE ORLANDO BLOOM FOR ALL I KNOW: Oh, Kee, that’s SUPER. Whatever will you wear with them?
KEIRA: I’m not sure, but I do think it’s smashing how your profile looks so much like Luke Perry’s.
OOBLWCBHBRBMABOBFAIK: He is my everything.
KEIRA: I do reckon he’d have washed his hair a bit, though. Look, pay attention to me again, okay? The shoes. I’ve already got the skort suit to go with them, and it’s pretty spectacular. It looks like a Bed In A Bag set.
OOBLWCBHBRBMABOBFAIK: Well done, you. There isn’t a girl alive who isn’t cringing at how many of those she bought back in the 90s, and how fooled they all were by culottes. Making people uncomfortable is totally principle No. 1 of Siennaing yourself. Well played. …
Click here to read the full exchange, and have a happy Pirates’ weekend. Yaaaaarrrrgh!
