It was all about Egypt in this episode, as Caesar took a small group of men to find out what happened to Pompey. The child king of Egypt is in a feud with his sister (none other than Cleopatra) and the king describes his relationship with her by saying, “I piss on her! I shit on her!” How’s that for a sibling rivalry? Once Caesar finds out that Pompey was beheaded he realizes that this boy ruling Egypt (for Rome) will not do and he sends out a couple of men – Lucius and Titus, of course – to find Cleopatra.
The two men find her and actually save her life before Cleo orders Lucius to have sex with her because she wants to give Caesar a child, saying that her “womb is between floods.” Colorful imagery aside, you have to like the reasoning – Cleo is a deceptive one, for sure. Having a conscience, Lucius can’t pull the trigger so he orders Titus to do it. As expected, the big fella has no problem sexing up the beautiful princess, and an angry Lucius ends up suffering from serious penis envy. When they return the princess to Alexandria, Cleo seduces Caesar and nine months later, Caesar has his first son – or so he thinks. Titus doesn’t seem bothered by the fact that he may have a son that will never know his true father, but that is a secret that he’ll have to take to his grave, or else face the consequences
