Based on Sunday’s estimates, courtesy of boxofficemojo.com:
1) Miami Vice: $25.2 million (first week)
Universal’s marketing strategy to push the movie in its second week: “See ‘Miami Vice,’ or this sack full of kittens will drown.”
2) Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest: $20.5 million ($358.4 million, fourth week)
Just when I was complaining about how bad “Pirates” was, I must offer this admission: it’s better than “Miami Vice.”
3) John Tucker Must Die: $14.1 million (first week)
A thousand lashes to the movie’s music supervisor, for not using Wilco’s “I Am Trying to Break Your Heart.”
4) Monster House: $11.5 million ($43.9 million, second week)
Next time we see a kite near the front door of a house, we’re running for the hills.
5) The Ant Bully: $8.1 million (first week)
It’s official: the studios went to the animation well way, way too much this year. Worse, we still have to suffer through “Barnyard: The Original Party Animals,” which will make your kids so dumb they’ll forget their own name when it’s over.
7) Lady in the Water: $7 million ($32 million, second week)
Before we start pouring gas onto the festering pile of waste that is M. Night Shyamalan’s reputation, keep in mind that this movie will ultimately make its money back. The problem, of course, is that the studio was expecting it to print money, not break even. Here’s an idea: hire him as a director, but use someone else’s script.
Another reminder: the movie to see when Talladega Nights is sold out is “The Descent,” a super-creepy gorefest involving a group of rock climbing girls with bad, bad luck. Think “Aliens” crossed with “The Hills Have Eyes.”
