Month: August 2009 (Page 25 of 33)

TCA Tour: FX Executive Session

John Landgraf, President of FX, just sat down and gave us his Executive Session, and here’s what came out of it:

* FX pursued six pilots this time around – three dramas, three comedies – and they’ve already picked up two of those. The first is an animated series entitled “Archer,” which stars Aisha Tyler, Chris Parnell, and H. Jon Benjamin, and is set at ISIS, an international spy agency where global crises are merely opportunities for its highly trained employees to confuse, undermine, betray and royally screw each other. (I’ve seen the first episode and it’s very Adult Swim, but that’s to be expected from a show created by Adam Reed, the man behind “Sealab 2021” and “Frisky Dingo.”)

The second, “Lawman,” was developed by Graham Yost (“Boomtown”) and stars Timothy Olyphant (“Deadwood”) as Raylan Givens, a character created by Elmore Leonard in his short story, “Fire in the Hole.”

* The network is also working with Louis CK, is looking into “Terriers,” created by Shawn Ryan and Ted Griffin, and a pilot entitled “Lights Out,” which was written by Justin Zackham (“The Bucket List”) and stars Holt McCallany, Elias Koteas, and Melora Hardin.

* Landgraf was absolutely not surprised about the lack of Emmy nominations for “The Shield.” I find that sad.

* The current “Rescue Me” season,, which Landgraf says they are “unbelievably satisfied” with, will consist of 22 episodes, and FX has picked up 18 more for next season, though they are contemplating expanding that order. When the show returns next summer, it will probably be earlier than it was this year. (The delay was predominantly due to the writer’s strike.)

* “Testees” will not be back for a second season on FX, but it will have a second season…in Canada, where it was apparently more successful.

* Announcements regarding the cast of Season 3 of “Damages” will hopefully be made within the next week or two, and Landgraf says, “I don’t think anyone in this room would guess who they’re going to.” The network was naturally disappointed with the ratings of the series in Season 2, but he admits, “It’s a very demanding show. It’s one where you can’t watch 3, 5, 7 episodes out of 13. You’re either in or you’re out.” This obviously doesn’t fit the current mindset for TV viewers, who he describes as being “more interested in dating than marriage,” but the series is what it is.

“If we came back with ‘Damages’ and it was Patty Hughes as Perry Mason, and every year she broke someone down on the stand and got her man or woman, you guys would literally be eviscerating me,” said Landgraf. “And I would deserve it.”

Lastly, here are the premiere dates for your favorite – and soon-to-be-favorite – FX series:

Sons of Anarchy,” Season 2 premieres on September 8th
It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia,” Season 5 premieres on September 17th
Nip/Tuck,” Season 6 premieres on October 14th
Archer,” premieres in the fall
Damages,” Season 3 premieres in January 2010
Lawman,” premieres in the spring of 2010
Rescue Me,” Season 6 premieres in the spring or summer of 2010

TCA Tour: Gordon Ramsay

During Fox’s session to promote Gordon Ramsay’s three series on their network, we enjoyed a rare bit of interactivity between panelist and audience, and…oh, wait: if you’re a Ramsay fan, then you probably noticed that I said that he has three series on Fox. Well, okay, you’re right, he does only have two at the moment, but come December 15th, you can say “hello” to his latest endeavor, “Gordon Ramsay: Cookalong Live.” To celebrate this development, Chef Ramsay led us all through an attempt to whip up some topping for Baked Alaska, promising that the person who did the best job would earn themselves a table for four at Hell’s Kitchen.

Sadly, I did not win…and when I say I didn’t win, what I mean to say is that it wasn’t even close. I added too much of the egg-white mixture, resulting in a topping so pitiful that Chef Ramsay took one look at it and said sadly, “Oh, mate…” But I took comfort in the fact that it still had enough substance to it to be browned a bit when he took his pocket blowtorch to it, and when I met up with him post-panel, it definitely seemed to be a case of “no harm, no foul.” (What, like he’s not used to dealing with the occasional sub-par chef…?)

I just want you to know that your sad delivery of the words, “Oh, mate,” about my Baked Alaska will ring in my ears forever.

Oh, shit. Really? Was it that bad?

No, thankfully, there were others that were worse. But it was just the way you said it…

Well, I just wanted to have a little bit of interactivity…and it was fun doing it as well!

I had the added bonus of Fox’s photographer snapping a picture of me when you were hitting my Baked Alaska with the blowtorch.

Oh, really? Even better.

So, Gordon, when do you sleep? You’ve got three shows now on Fox, and that’s not even counting what you’ve got going in the UK.

Yeah, good question! Chefs aren’t very good at sleeping, anyway. Guy Savoy said to me 20 years ago, when I was in his kitchen and said, “Sorry, Chef, I’m a little bit tired,” he said, “Tired? How many hours sleep did you have last night?” I said, “Six.” He said, “Fucking way too much.” I said, “What?” He said, “Think about it: the average person sleeps for eight hours a day, so when you get to sixty years of age, that means you would’ve slept for twenty years. Does that scare you?” I said, “Yeah!” He said, “So shut the fuck up, sleep four hours a night, get to sixty, and only have slept for ten years of your life!” And so that’s ringing in now. That’s in there now.

Is every contestant who appears on “Hell’s Kitchen” really an aspiring chef? Because you get someone like Joseph on there, and he’s too good for TV to actually be real.

If I had to cast for that program, then I would be looking at one-star, two-star, three-star Michelin chefs all day long. Did they try with Thomas Keller? Did they spend time with Jean Georges or Daniel? Did they come out and advertise? Because I want to be surrounded by, sort of, chefs in that environment. Out of respect for them, I never get to see any of their resumes before we meet, and so it’s quite an interesting fact because they all seem excited and motivated on winning the challenge. This year’s responsibility in terms of running that restaurant at the Araxi up in British Columbia, Vancouver, is a perfect setup. 99.9 percent of the ingredients are located within a hundred miles of that radius. So, from a chef’s point of view, it’s a dream come true, even the wine, meat, fish, vegetables located within a hundred miles of that radius. So that outburst was ridiculous because no one could ever foresee what was going to happen. I didn’t realize that he was acting, you know, the way he was behind the scenes of the dorm. I never see any of that stuff going on because it’s unfair for me to judge them on the downtime because that is purely off my limits, and I didn’t know what to do in terms of — I asked him a very simple question three times, and he didn’t want to answer it. It was hard because I’ve been to Afghanistan, and I’ve been out, cooking for the Marines last year for a thousand of them, U.S. and the U.K., and the atmosphere was electric. The banter was phenomenal, and to go and change their view and give them something that they deserve in terms of a decent meal on Christmas Eve was a dream come true. So to have that kind of negativity from him, I think there were issues on a personal front that needed to be solved before he came into “Hell’s Kitchen.”

Which “Hell’s Kitchen” contestant over the years has surprised you the most from when they started to when they finished?

Elsie (from Season 1). Yeah, what, from a Waffle House chef to cooking the most amazing, authentic American food? And then an extraordinary palate like that…? That was amazing. Yeah, Elsie. She’s good.

Are you surprised when people take your comments as personally as they do, given that they’ve gone out of their way to be on your show?

I’ve gotten a little bit sort of surprised, in a way. But I don’t edit it, because I’m a chef, not an entertainer, so I call it as I see it. If you had to come in my kitchen tonight at The London West Hollywood, and things went wrong, of course I’m going to cane someone’s ass! But when things go right, I’m going to equally compliment them! When we’re in the middle of that pressurized environment, getting straight to the point is the healthiest thing. I don’t want it becoming cancerous, where they come into work the next day and it’s still on their shoulders. I get straight to the point. Don’t question me in there; question me after it. When we come out of it, if you want to talk to me and you want insight, fine. Because it’s not that one incident, it’s the 25 chefs behind and 180 people sitting in the dining room as well. So sitting and discussing it at length…? You haven’t got that time. It’s live, and…that’s what I said earlier about the “Cookalong.” For me, it’s how I am, and cooking along…I think it’s going to be a huge insight into what I can really do, because not enough people see me cooking, and that’s been frustrating for the last three or four years! All they say is, “Stop cursing and cook more!” So I’m going to do it!

And, lastly, are you surprised that your shows have taken off as well as they have in the States? Because, y’know, we’re not always necessarily known for embracing the abrasive.

No, I suppose I just try to keep it real. I am somewhat surprised, but, y’know, we work hard at it. That’s the most important thing.

(Special thanks to our man Mike Farley for the questions. Wish you could’ve been here, sir; I know you would’ve dug it.)

“G.I. Joe” to enforce age (and gender?) apartheid at box office (updated)

It’s hard to tell from the wilds of deepest North Orange County, but I’m guessing that Hollywood’s in a mild state of shock following the very unexpected death of John Hughes, without a doubt one of the most influential writers and directors of the past two-and a half decades. Nevertheless, life goes on and the box office is the fact of life in the film business.

And so it is that, Lord help us all, “G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra” seems poised to take this coming weekend’s chase for the green fairly effortlessly. Indeed, the always jovial Carl DiOrio of The Hollywood Reporter expects something in the neighborhood of $45-50 million. As mentioned here before, the actioner hasn’t been screened for critics, an increasingly common studio ploy that is nevertheless still somewhat rare for a film as high profile as this one.

Variety‘s Pamela McClintock, though not setting any numbers out for us, remarks that the action/sci-fi flick and toy/game marketing device is:

…sparking strong interest among both young and older men, as well as some curiosity among younger femmes, according to tracking.

Why any sensible young person of either gender should be interested in this film eludes me, but I guess we’ll have to see if there’s enough insensible ones from both to make this film more than a young male bastion. I should also add that some critics in the online and foreign press have managed to somehow see the film despite Paramount’s non-screening decision, and the Rotten Tomatoes numbers are less dismal than you would expect. Still, in my estimation, the best reviews lack all conviction while the worst are filled with passionate intensity, though the rough beast we call the teenage populace will not be stopped from slouching towards the Plex-ville. (My profoundest apologies to Mr. Yeats.)

Intriguingly, while both Variety and THR say “Joe” will be deploying to 3,500 screens, Box Office Mojo has the film in over 4,000 theaters. The cinematic Powell doctrine, anyone?

Continue reading »

TCA Tour: “Hung”

It’s been several days since we were treated to HBO’s panel on their new series, “Hung,” but I just hadn’t been rushing to write it up, mostly because I still haven’t checked out the show yet. I didn’t get advance screeners for the first two episodes, then I did get screeners for the second two episodes, but by that point, I had too many other things in my pile that were more important for me to watch, and…well, here we are. But even without having watched the show, I still got several laughs out of some of the exchanges during the panel, so the least I can do is offer those bits up for your reading enjoyment.

Thomas Jane in Hung season 1

Colette Burson (series co-creator): I think we see what makes him special all the time in terms of dealing with the women.
Jane Adams: I know *I* do.

_ _ _ _ _

Colette Burson: Thomas actually is someone we had thought of long before this audition process happened, and he actually didn’t really go through the audition process in quite the same way. Itt happened afterwards, and we talked to him, and we met with him, and then he read some. But, again, none of these issues really came up. It was just all about he sort of captured the essence of Ray.
Thomas Jane: I did have to go into the next room to disrobe, so I wouldn’t hit anybody in the eye.

_ _ _ _ _

Critic: Even today, we’ve sort of been tripping over double entendres and things. But did you think maybe this was going to lead to a funny press tour session?
Thomas Jane: Or bigger things?
Critic: Extend your career?
Jane Adams: Like while you are holding that mic, too. Really, it’s become surreal.
Thomas Jane: Speak into the mic and tell me how you feel about my penis.

_ _ _ _ _

Thomas Jane: You know, the fact is that it’s all fucking fate and luck, man. This is fate and luck that we are all up here together talking to you about a show about a guy with a big dick. Right? Fate and luck. There is no reason this show should be good. The show should be bad. It’s about a guy with a big dick who fucks people for money. Fuck you.

_ _ _ _ _

Critic: Given that it seems like most women who would purchase those services are interested in the totality of the experience rather than the size issue, as this is about a heterosexual gigolo, how did you wind up focusing on “Hung”?
Colette Burson: We don’t really make the marketing decisions. But interestingly enough, I think that the marketing was designed to not focus on that, actually. Like, not to focus on his penis.
Thomas Jane: Are you asking, why is the show called “Hung” if we’re not showing how big this guy’s cock is?
Critic: Well, if it’s more about the totality of the gigolo experience rather than size, why the emphasis on size in the title?
Thomas Jane: Because it grabs you.
Jane Adams: It’s funny that you said “cock.” Isn’t it Mo’Nique that has a joke about, like, Black guys say “dick” and white people say “cock”?
Thomas Jane: “Cock.” Yeah. I wouldn’t say “dick.” I say “cock.”
Sue Naegle (President, HBO Entertainment):We have time for one more long, hard question…

Thomas Jane and Jane Adams in Hung season 1.jpg

Critic: I wanted to ask Mr. Jane if this has made you think about what women want, and…
Thomas Jane: Absolutely not. Don’t get the impression that I’m going to think about what women want.
Critic: …what women want, and also about what women go through. Say, for example, female prostitutes.
Thomas Jane: Right, those poor sullied creatures of the night. No. Absolutely not. I just don’t want to know what they go through after I give them my $300.
Jane Adams: Are you guys Twittering? Did anybody get that? Because I can’t wait to read that shit later.
Thomas Jane: There was a syntax in there. I have given them. In the distant past.
Jane Adams: Anyway…
Thomas Jane: I knew people who used to give $300 or $400 to people who I didn’t care about.
Sue Naegle: Is it safe to say we’re done…?

John Hughes 1950 – 2009

John Hughes, the man responsible for capturing teen angst with more humor than anyone else in the 1980s, has died, and as a tribute, I offer up sixteen of my favorite quotes from the man who gave us “Sixteen Candles.” Your mileage with these selections may vary, particularly since I wanted to pay specific tribute to his writing (if we were limiting ourselves solely to films that he directed, we wouldn’t be able to use “Pretty in Pink” or “Some Kind of Wonderful”), but that’s what the Replies section is for, so don’t be afraid to leave your own favorites below.

1. “I understand that you little guys start out with your woobies and you think they’re great… and they are, they are terrific. But pretty soon, a woobie isn’t enough. You’re out on the street trying to score an electric blanket, or maybe a quilt. And the next thing you know, you’re strung out on bedspreads Ken. That’s serious.” – Jack Butler (Michael Keaton), “Mr. Mom” (1983)

2. “This is no longer a vacation. It’s a quest. It’s a quest for fun, I’m gonna have fun and you’re gonna have fun, we’re all gonna have so much fucking fun we’ll need plastic surgery to remove our goddamn smiles! You’ll be whistling Zip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah out of your assholes! I gotta be crazy; I’m on a pilgrimage to see a moose! Praise Marty Moose! Oh, shit!” – Clark Griswold (Chevy Chase), “National Lampoon’s Vacation” (1983)

3. “Can I borrow your underpants for ten minutes?” – The Geek (Anthony Michael Hall), “Sixteen Candles” (1984)

4. “Does Barry Manilow know that you raid his wardrobe?” – Bender (Judd Nelson), “The Breakfast Club” (1985)

5. “How about a nice, greasy pork sandwich served in a dirty ashtray?” – Chet Donnelly (Bill Paxton), “Weird Science” (1985)

6. “I love this woman, and I have to tell her. And if she laughs, she laughs. And if she doesn’t love me, she doesn’t love me. But if I don’t find out…oh, I love her too much.” – Ducky Dale (Jon Cryer), “Pretty in Pink” (1986)

7. “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.” – Ferris Bueller (Matthew Broderick), “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off” (1986)

8. “I like art, I work in a gas station, my best friend is a tomboy. These things don’t fly too well in the American high school.” – Keith Nelson (Eric Stoltz) – “Some Kind of Wonderful (1987)

9. “The last thing I want to be remembered as is an annoying blabbermouth. You know, nothing grinds my gears worse than some chowderhead that doesn’t know when to keep his big trap shut. If you catch me running off with my mouth, just give me a poke on the chubbs.” Del (John Candy), “Planes, Trains and Automobiles” (1987)

10. “In the end, I realized that I took more than I gave, I was trusted more than I trusted, and I was loved more than I loved. And what I was looking for was not to be found but to be made.” – Jake Briggs (Kevin Bacon), “She’s Having A Baby” (1988)

11. “You know what the gourmet here wanted? Hot dogs! You know what they’re made of, Chet? Huh? Lips and assholes!” – Roman Craig (Dan Aykroyd) “The Great Outdoors” (1988)

12. “Stand me up today, and tomorrow I’ll drive you to school in my robe and pajamas and walk you to your first class. 4:00, okay?” – Buck Russell (John Candy), “Uncle Buck” (1989)

13. “Where do you think you’re going? Nobody’s leaving. Nobody’s walking out on this fun, old-fashioned family Christmas. No, no. We’re all in this together. This is a full-blown, four-alarm holiday emergency here. We’re gonna press on, and we’re gonna have the hap, hap, happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny fucking Kaye! And when Santa squeezes his fat white ass down that chimney tonight, he’s gonna find the jolliest bunch of assholes this side of the nuthouse!” – Clark Griswold (Chevy Chase), “National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation” (1989)

14. “Bless this highly nutritious microwavable macaroni and cheese dinner and the people who sold it on sale. Amen.” – Kevin McCallister (Macauley Culkin), “Home Alone” (1990)

15. “Any little fraulein who expects anything more from me than a little bit of pleasure, a little bit of danger, and a great set of pectorals, she’s lookin’ for a fall right on her ass.” – Jim Dodge (Frank Whaley), “Career Opportunities” (1991)

And one to bring it on home…

16. Jake: Happy birthday, Samantha. Make a wish.
Samantha: It already came true.

R.I.P., Mr. Hughes. Thanks…and don’t worry: we won’t forget about you.

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