Here’s a sentence that I never thought I’d hear uttered:

“You’re going to throw down a chicken foot over a puddle of puke?”

But that’s “Prison Break” for you.

As the FOX promo said, the brothers are back. When we last left them, a foiled escape attempt led to a decision by the new warden (we’ll just call him “The General”) to kick Scofield out of Sona. A few minutes in the hotbox and Michael sang like a canary, choosing to trust The General when he said that he could help.

This course of action showed some promise, but alas, the show is called “Prison Break” not “Let The General Help You Out.” The General seemed like a pretty smart guy, someone who has had to survive in a tough business, so it seems quite odd that he’d only take one soldier on his trip with Gretchen to find LJ. Sure, one soldier should be enough if it were only Gretchen he had to worry about, but didn’t he allow for the possibility that she might be setting a trap? At the very least, you’d think he’d account for a few armed men with the hostage, who just might put up a fight.

(Sigh.)

Anyway, The General and his sole bodyguard are dead and Michael is back in Sona. What is old is new again.

The writers did their damndest to touch base with just about every character on the show. Michael, Linc, T-Bag, Sucre, Gretchen, Whistler, Sofia, T-Bag, Bellick, Luchero, Sammy, Sammy’s drug dealer, McGrady, Mahone and even Mahone’s friend (who looks like she has some romantic feelings for everybody’s favorite corrupt FBI agent) all got some screen time. It made for a scattershot episode, but it pushed the storyline back into the prison, and it looks like Michael still has to break everyone out. The best thing to come out of this episode was Michael’s declaration that he’s coming for Gretchen. For me, that’s the proverbial carrot at the end of the “Prison Break” stick.

Anyone who fell for Linc and Sucre’s little spat in the lobby of the hotel should look inward and ask themselves if they have paid proper attention to the show during its three seasons. I saw that switcheroo coming from ten miles away, and believe me, I’m not bragging. We were supposed to be surprised when Sucre broke into a little smile in the hotel room, but really, was anyone surprised?

(After that spiel, I doubt anyone will admit to that now.)

I’ll end on a prediction – Linc and Sofia get together by the end of the season. Whistler did say he loved her, but she doesn’t trust him anymore and Linc just saved her life. I’m not sure when, but those two are going to hook up.

One last thing – I noticed something a little odd. LJ said he was there when Gretchen killed Sara, but he said he closed his eyes. Are the creators leaving open the possibility that Sara is alive? I guess all it would take to convince Linc about Sara’s death would be a fake severed head, and it wouldn’t be too hard to fool him. I don’t think that’s the direction they’re heading, but I thought I’d throw it out there and see if it sticks.