“One day I will rule you all. MWAH-HA-HA-HA-HAAA…!”
Marriage to child bride? Check. Virgin birth to thetan-free, genetically superior miracle baby? Check. Conversion of World’s Most Ridiculously Attractive Couple to Scientology? Still working on it…
Not to be satisfied until every A-, B-, and C-list member of the Screen Actors Guild has personally — personally — and publicly professed his or her love for hack 1950’s sci-fi writer and Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard, Tom Cruise is now going after the biggest of Big Kahunas: Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie.
Far from taking offense at Brad and Angie’s presumed failure to congratulate him on the recent adoption birth of his own little adopted clearly not biological daughter Suri, Tom Cruise recently started working the phones on behalf of Hollywood’s favorite cult religion. From VH-1’s Best Week Ever:
Reports are in that Cruise called to congratulate the Tomb Raider star on her new baby with whatshisname and then offered an open invitation to the Scientology center when she returns to LA. He even promised to give her a Scientology award for her human rights work, if she’d just stop by the center.
Okay, maybe this one’s just a rumor…but even if it is, the fact that it seems entirely plausible shows just how far Tom’s star has fallen…or how high his bad crazy moon has risen…or something.
