So it finally came down to Russell vs. Nona for all the marbles, and if you haven’t noticed, “Hell’s Kitchen” has regressed to the point that they don’t do the finale live anymore. But that’s okay….if they did, it would be two long and grueling hours. As it was, they started out with Nona and Russell being whisked off in a helicopter to the site of LA Market, where one of them would become head chef. But of course they would have a challenge, and that would be to whip up 5 courses in 45 minutes…say what? Really? There is no way I believe they did that. Anyway, Gordon Ramsay brought in some of his celebrity chef buddies and subordinates to judge each course. As always it came down to a tie after four rounds (has it ever not?) and for the meat course judged by executive chef at LA Market Kerri Simon, Russell won. So his prize? Once they arrived back at the dorm, they were surprised by eight of their former teammates being there. They would choose their teams, and Russell had the first pick.

He chose Jillian, and Nona chose Gail. Russell then wound up with Vinny, Sabrina and Rob; while Nona had Melissa, Trev and Boris. Russell reluctantly picked Vinny and Vinny didn’t want to be on Russell’s team because of how Russell treated him at Vinny’s elimination. It was kind of funny. But not as funny as when Russell almost fired Vinny and Vinny referred to Russell as a “douchebag” afterward.

During the dinner service, there were definitely problems–Vinny wasn’t cooking fish properly, Trev was over-dressing salad, Sabrina was stewing beef instead of grilling it, and Boris was just Boris. Nona and Russell tried to reel their teams in, but Russell did so in a degrading manner. It was right then that I knew Ramsay would not choose him to win. Russell also tried to rush food out, and Ramsay pulled him aside and said, “One table at a time, big boy.” Meanwhile, Nona’s team wound up getting it all together.

So the winner would be chosen from customer comment cards and also from Ramsay’s own thoughts. Both Nona and Russell wanted it badly and in many ways you could have argued for either of them. But still, I think all of America knew……Nona won. You could see Russell jarring the door handle, thinking it was a mistake, and being so pissed. So what does he do? He blames it on his team, thinking they purposely threw him under the bus. What a douche. You were right, Vinny. Meanwhile, Nona was a gracious champ and will do well, though I still think the talent this season was lacking compared with previous seasons. And I’m pretty sure the show will be on hiatus for a bit…..or do they have three more seasons in the can already? I guess we’ll find out soon enough.

Thanks for reading everyone, and happy holidays!

Last week after Raj was eliminated from “Hell’s Kitchen,” the next logical thing to happen was to kick off Sabrina, the mouthy red teamer who seems to know how to cook but can’t for the life of her get along with anybody. But last night’s two episodes sent two different contestants home. Here is how it played out:

EPISODE 1

Initial challenge: Creating a tasting menu for Beverly Hills High School prom to be held that evening in Hell’s Kitchen
Mistakes: dry halibut for the blue team
Winner: Red team
Prize: Amusement park day
Punishment: Setting up room for prom..Russell gets lippy with high school students who are trying to tell him how to set room up…James tells him to shut up and Trev takes the lead instead
Dinner service: The prom
Mistakes: Emily’s soggy crab cakes, Melissa firing about 20 filets before they were ordered, Boris slow on fish station, Emily serving raw halibut, Melissa slicing meat too soon and Nona interrupting Ramsay when he was telling Melissa how to slice or not slice meat
Quote: Ramsay referring to some weird purple and green mess on two plates as “Barbie vomit or purple snot.”
Winner: Blue team,as Russell stepped up as a vocal leader. Sabrina was best of the worst, but not before Nona spoke up that she shouldn’t be.
On the block: Melissa and Emily. But the blue team tried to convince Sabrina to put Gail on the block since Emily would self-destruct at some point anyway.
Going home: Emily. Good choice, Sabrina. Meanwhile, before making his decision, Ramsay asked Nona to announce who she thought should go home. She said Emily as well, but maybe learned to keep her mouth shut.

EPISODE 2

Before this began, Ramsay put Melissa on the blue team and Trev on the red team.

Initial challenge: Creating salads for Bon Appetit editor Sarah Tenaglia
Mistakes: Nona’s quail looking like a dead hamster (ewww)
Winner: Blue team
Prize: Lunch in Malibu, and Rob had the winning salad (with seared scallops) that would appear in Bon Appetit with a photo shoot, and the salad would also appear on the Hell’s Kitchen menu that night
Punishment: Prepping for dinner service and being served a lunch of edible flowers. Blech.
Mistakes: There were “Chef’s Tables” that evening, but I didn’t recognize any of the celebrities, did you? Anyway, Boris cooked rubber shrimp, Melissa failing on scallops, Nona serving raw scallops but Trev rescued her, Sabrina did not have gnocchi ready on garnish station, Boris did not season his mashed potatoes at all.
Quote: Ramsay told Sabrina to “Shut it!” and then told Boris to “Get out!”
Winner: No winner. Each team had to nominate one person for elimination. Ramsay had asked for a perfect dinner service for the chef’s tables, but didn’t get anything close to that.
On the block: Sabrina and Boris. But Ramsay asked Nona and Melissa to also step forward.
Going home: Melissa. Ramsay gave her a chance on a different team but she failed that test. Still, the combustible Sabrina has hung on these last few episodes after being on the chopping block almost every time.

So there you go….and next week we have two more episodes, because Fox doesn’t begin its playoff baseball coverage until the week after that. Then it’s a two- and possibly three-week break, depending on what happens with the World Series. Thanks for reading and see you all next week!

Mrs. Mike made the comment last week that she thinks a couple of the “Hell’s Kitchen” contestants are “plants.” Meaning, the producers put them in there to say things and act a certain way. Well, after two weeks of this show (and a grueling four episodes I might add), I think I agree. Raj and Sabrina are just certified nuts….and neither appears to really know what they’re doing or know how to get along with people in the kitchen. But I digress…here is a brief recap of last night’s episodes:

EPISODE 1

Initial challenge: Cooking breakfast for paramedics
Mistakes: Emily burned bacon, Raj did not season eggs properly
Winner: Red team
Prize: Poolside lunch with Gordon Ramsay in Santa Monica, and trapeze lessons
Punishment: Blue team had to clean up kitchen and polish glasses for cocktails later that evening, during which all of his teammates started harassing Raj and calling him out for being weird and not a team player
Dinner service: Jillian and Trev would be making cocktails and menu was standard.
Mistakes: Raj could not cook fish properly, started eating fish at one point and also stuck his head in the freezer to “cool off.” He also added sauce to grilled fish. Emily “helped” Jillian salt her pasta, but in the dining room the guests thought it was too salty. Hmmm. Melissa’s fish was called “Gandhi’s flip flop” by Ramsay. Boris’ Wellington was raw in the middle. Gail burned her meat and then didn’t pay attention as it was burning in front of her.
Quote: Ramsay referred to Raj as having his thumb up his “fat crack.” Awesome!
Winner: Blue team, somehow. Customer comment cards showed they had 54% who liked their meals while red team had 50%.
On the block: Emily and Sabrina. Sabrina commented that she had “bigger balls” than anyone else on the red team. For real, Sabrina?
Going home: Raj. Thing is, I saw this coming. I don’t think any of us wanted to watch this guy spontaneously combust on TV, and neither did Ramsay. Whew.

EPISODE 2

Initial challenge: Ravioli making in 30 minutes. Teams had to rank dishes in order of presenting to Ramsay. Trev’s dish was not even tried so he was ranked last but was pissed about it.
Winner: Blue team, as Trev beat out Gail for the final point.
Prize: Helicopter ride to ocean resort, a bit of golf and lunch on the water. Trev started in about his ravioli for no reason.
Quote: Trev to Gail: “Wanna make out?” Ewwwwwwwwww
Punishment: Milking cows for fresh mozzarella.
Dinner service: Vinny’s ravioli was on menu.
Mistakes: Melissa served cold ravioli, Louis served up cold salmon, Sabrina did not know how to cook a pork chop, Rob burned pizza, Gail was slow, Boris started washing dishes during service. Finally, Chef Ramsay shut the kitchen down because he’d seen enough.
Winner: Neither team. They had to nominated two each for elimination.
On the block: Melissa, Sabrina, Louis and Boris.
Back in line: Melissa and Boris
Going home: Louis

So there you have it. Now we’re down to 11 contestants already, and probably two more will go home next week before Fox’s baseball playoff coverage begins. See you then!

Every season, “Hell’s Kitchen” on Fox seems to up the ante when it comes to brash contestants who like to get in each others’ faces and who sometimes get in Chef Gordon Ramsay’s face. And somehow, despite the fact that they found 16 contestants among 10,000 applicants, they always manage to draw about 50% from the New York tri-state area. Seriously, if you watched last night’s episode, the New YAWK accents are quite dominant.

The show opened with the 16 hopefuls meeting new maitre’ D James. What, where the heck is Jean Phillippe??? Then they were blindfolded and sent to the new location of where they might be working if they win this season–LA Market. Ramsay was there to greet them and then sent them back to Hell’s Kitchen to prepare their signature dishes for him, in 45 minutes time.

The guys won, but not before some funny moments–like when Emily had her boobs basically sticking out of her dress, and Ramsay said to “cover your puppies.” Ha! He then caught Sabrina yawning and almost threw her out. Antonia made some dish that looked like poop and according to Ramsay and everyone else that Ramsay made taste it, tasted like poop as well. The ladies had to clean up the kitchen and the guys got to have a lunch that included champagne, caviar and neck massages. Raj, who is one of those rambunctious New Yorkers, started doing karate kicks after he had a few cocktails. Awesome.

During dinner service, Antonia had bad migraines but was shaking so bad when the medics arrived that they took her to the hospital. That was scary, and I’m kind of annoyed that the producers showed all that. Anyway, Antonia won’t be back this season, so despite her poop dish, we hope she is okay.

For the dinner service, Raj and Emily were taking orders for the mini-pizza appetizers, and Raj did not know what he was doing at all. Trev was dressing the salads like he was dressing himself up for winter. Melissa made raw meat. Boris started mimicking Ramsay saying “RAW!” and Ramsay proceeded to rip ol’ Boris a new one. Classic. Lisa didn’t know how to cook scallops, continually flipping them so as not to get a nice sear. Sabrina was trying to brown nose Ramsay by bringing her food to the pass was done while still waiting for her teammate’s fish and garnishes.

After two hours, no entrees had left the kitchen and people were starting to leave. Ramsay had to shut it down, and said it was the worst opening service ever in Hell’s Kitchen. Do you get the feeling the producers found more amateurish chefs on purpose this time to make for better TV?

Ramsay had each team nominate one person for elimination–blue went with Raj and Trev, and red went with Lisa and Sabrina. But Sabrina was kicking and screaming, throwing Nona under the bus along the way. Ramsay told Sabrina and Trev to get back in line, and he sent Lisa home. Raj and his karate kicks were also safe. Of course they were….why would you send ratings gold like that home so soon?

Episode 2, which was the second hour of the 2-hour premiere (please Fox, don’t make this a 2-hour event every week, but I know you will with baseball playoffs coming up), started with a loud wake up call for the chefs. Then they were brought downstairs where Ramsay introduced his friend, Masaharu Morimoto, an Iron Chef from Food Network. They had to watch Morimoto make two sushi dishes and then re-create them. The guys won this challenge too and got to have a plane fly them to San Francisco (on Southwest….why no private plane, or was this an advertising thing?)…for a wine lunch. You know that that meant…more karate chops! The ladies had to stay back and prep and then eat some “delicacies” that looked disgusting, and I don’t even want to know what they were.

At dinner service, one chef from each team was chosen to be an assistant maitre’ D…Jillian and Vinny. Of course there’s a Vinny, right?
It then took Vinny 30 minutes to get his order in. Gail made good risotto, and Sabrina made good sushi (she appears to be able to cook well but can’t get along with anyone). But many of the chefs failed–Curtis poorly executed sushi, Emily undercooked meat, Boris undercooked scallops, and Vinny told diners not to order sides because Raj could not keep up in the kitchen. He was right, but Ramsay was fuming about the fact that Vinny did this. Eventually, Raj and the rest of them were kicked out of the kitchen, and Raj was trying to karate chop again. The blue team lost, obviously, and Ramsay asked for two consensus chefs for elimination.

They sent up Raj and Boris, but then Ramsay wanted Vinny to also step forward. Then, he threw them all for a loop by eliminating Curtis. You know, I have to admit, I am not positive how this went down because I was FALLING ASLEEP after watching two hours of this show. But I’m sure that Ramsay decided to keep Raj and Vinny and Boris around for ratings. I mean, karate chops and Boris mimicking Ramsay? That’s gold. But Curtis clearly didn’t have the cooking chops needed here.

So this season is going to be mighty interesting. But we’re already down to 13 with Antonia out. Thanks for reading and see you all next week!

Last night’s “Biggest Loser” finale on NBC was a true showdown of four contestants who really deserved to be there. No real game play was evident this season, anyone who started to play the game was swiftly eliminated by everyone else. Anyway, this was a live event, but they went through and showed each of their collective journey, especially how they all had to weigh in in front of their hometown friends and family at the start. This included the ubiquitous showing of Daris saying “I will do everything I can to make you proud,” in which he sounds like an overweight robot. I mean, the producers of this show love that clip so much, that you could seriously create a drinking game around every time they show it.

Anyway, host Alison Sweeney brought out Daris and Koli, because America held the vote that would send one of them to the Top 3 and one of them back into the “at home” competition. You may remember that Daris slipped last week, overeating when he was home and training for the marathon. I thought for sure Koli would win based on that, but America had sympathy and voted for Daris. Maybe it was all a ploy by Daris? Hmmm. But either way, it would be Daris vs. Ashley and Mike for the title of The Biggest Loser. And Koli, who came out all fired up, was reduced to almost whimpering.

Then after showing former winners such as Danny, Bill and Erik, it was time for one of last season’s fiercest competitors, Shay, to weigh in for her Subway challenge. You may remember Subway enlisted her to win $1000 for every pound she lost from December up until now. Shay looks great, and she lost another 52 pounds for $52K! But then Jared from Subway came out and challenged Shay again, saying she and him would train for a marathon, and when completed, Subway would double that money. Wow. But that was awesome.

Okay, time to what we came here for. To see everyone and how much weight they’d lost. Here is how it broke down:

Cherita lost 91 pounds, down from 277 to 186
Victoria lost 136 pounds, down from 358 to 222
Sherry lost 99 pounds, down from 218 to a stunning 119 (current leader)
Maria lost 114 pounds, down from 281 to 167
Patty lost 73 pounds, down from 243 to 170
Stephanie lost 99 pounds, down from 264 to 165
James lost 128 pounds, down from 485 to 357
John lost 149 pounds, down from 484 to 335
Melissa lost 90 pounds, down from 233 to 143
Lance lost 128 pounds, down from 365 to 237
Migdalia lost 52 pounds, down from 265 to 213
Miggy lost 91 pounds, down from 240 to 149
O’Neal lost 159 pounds, down from 389 to 230

Sunshine lost 114 pounds, down from 275 to 161
Darrell lost 189 pounds, down from 413 to 224 and he took the lead from Sherry
Drea lost 84 pounds, down from 298 to 214
Cheryl lost 76 pounds, down from 227 to 151
Sam lost 142 pounds, down from 372 to 230
And finally Koli lost 215 pounds, down from 403 to 188, and he took the at-home prize from Darrell, with a 53.34% weight loss

Koli was asked by Alison what he was thinking, and he said, “I just want to go home with my family.” Yikes…..that’s all he could muster? He’d just won $100K!

So then it was time for the big showdown between Daris, Ashley and Mike. Daris went first, and lost 168 pounds, down from 346 to 178 for 48.55%. Ashley was next and lost 183 pounds, down from 374 to 191 for 48.93%. Both of them looked amazing, as did Mike, who went next. Mike started out as the heaviest contestant ever, at 526 pounds. He struggled a lot this season, but kept dropping weight like crazy. Mike lost 264 pounds, down from 526 to 262, for a 50.19% weight loss and the title of the Biggest Loser! Now this was a true Biggest Loser champion, the kind of person who can inspire millions of people. But until now, I didn’t realize that Koli had lost more percentage of weight than Mike, and if America had voted him into the Top 3, he would have won. Ouch, that has to sting a bit. But I like having Mike as the champ, and he won fair and square based on the rule of the game.

Now let’s hope Mike keeps that weight off and keeps going, because he still has a ways to go. But he sure deserved to win and should enjoy it. We’ll be on a conference call with him today so look for some excerpts from that interview later this week. Thanks for reading this season!