American Idol: lock them doors and turn the lights down low

Season 10 of “American Idol” is in the books. But before we get to the result, let’s talk about how bad the performances on the show were overall, in rapid-fire fashion….

The Top 13 performed Lady GaGa’s “Born This Way,” and we all expected GaGa to come out and join them, but she didn’t. Oh, but the performance was awful, and why do they make them wear all white like the Good Humor Man for these group numbers?

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American Idol: is it wrong to say that judges are on crack?

We know that Steven Tyler has an infamous history of drug use and living the rock ‘n’ roll lifestyle. But it was Randy Jackson and Jennifer Lopez that I thought were on crack last night on “American Idol.” More on that in a moment.

First, the Final Four of James, Scotty, Lauren and Haley had the task of picking two songs each–one that personally inspires them, and another from the great Leiber and Stoller catalog. For the latter, they would be mentored by Lady GaGa. Anyway, here is how it went down and how I saw it:

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American Idol: final four time

Well folks, we’ve reached the Final Four of “American Idol,” and we’re now just a few weeks away from finding out who this year’s champ will be. Are you all bored with the season and the fact that the talent is way watered down than in previous years? Apparently the ratings have dropped a bit too, as people miss Paula Abdul’s unpredictability and Adam Lambert’s screams.

Last night, the results show was excruciating. And if it weren’t for our DVR, I’d have pulled out what hair I have left on my head. Really, FOX? Did that show HAVE to be an hour long? There was enough banter between Ryan Seacrest and the judges to last an entire season.

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American Idol goes a little GaGa

Last night’s “American Idol” results show was a bit different than the past two weeks, because there was no mentor working with the contestants, and instead the theme was popular iTunes downloads. That meant guest appearances from #1 artist Lady GaGa and also from last season’s Idol, David Cook.

But first they recapped the previous night’s performances, along with snippets of the judges’ comments. Here was a gem from Paula that I forgot to write about yesterday, when she was draping praise over Adam Lambert: “True genius does not fulfill expectations, true genius shatters expectations.” Ugh. How much did you hire someone to write that for you, Paula?

Then after showing a typical day in the life of the Idol hopefuls, there was a group performance of Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believin'” and it wasn’t awful. Scott even got to play the piano instead of wandering around the stage aimlessly and trying not to trip on national TV. And Adam got to do a real scream, not a forced one.

Then, on to business….Ryan Seacrest broke them up into groups of three–Kris, Matt and Megan; Adam, Lil and Allison; and Scott, Danny and Anoop. He asked which of them we thought was the Bottom 3. I knew better…there would be one from each group to make up the bottom. Then David Cook arrived to sing his new single, “Come Back To Me” and was presented with a platinum album. He started tearing up, and for good reason…he told Seacrest that in 2006 he sold 1000 copies of an album he released on his own, and now he sells 1 million copies of his major label debut in 3 months, thanks to the power of the show. Damn.

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