Happy Cinco de Mayo, kind of, from “Machete”

Residents of a certain southwestern state take note…

This is obviously a newly recut trailer with that special message from the awesome Danny Trejo — not, I admit, nearly as funny/cool as the one in “Grindhouse.” On the other hand, we now have glimpses of Robert De Niro doing exploitation for pretty much the first time in his career, Steven Seagal, Michelle Rodriguez, the great Cheech Marin, Jessica Alba, Lindsay Lohan (on the comeback trail?), and “introducing Don Johnson.” Heh.

H/t Topless Robot.

  

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The best unsubstantiated rumor I’ve read all week

Bloody Disgusting is reporting, if that’s really the word for more or less passing on rumors, some potentially huge, or at least hugely interesting, casting news. According to one of BD’s “regular scoopers who enjoys remaining anonymous” (because he “enjoys” being employed?) mega-thesp Robert DeNiro and Apatow-hilarity-bringer Jonah Hill will both be accompanying mega-macho character actor Danny Trejo on a trip to possible cult nirvana in the long-rumored feature-length film version of “Machete.” (H/t AICN)

“Machete,” for those less fortunate amoung you who did not see Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino’s mostly hysterical “Grindhouse” in its original theatrical form, was the first of a number of rather brilliant gag trailers featured in the film. It’s your basic tale of an assassin getting double-crossed and taking his revenge, in this case with the help of his priest brother (Cheech Marin, a deity who walks amongst us who I pray will be in the feature as well). Except it wasn’t really such a gag in that Rodriguez said he had hopes of doing the tale as a feature all along.

Rodriguez has a gift for achieving a kind of greatness out of complete silliness, though he also has a problem with writing/presenting coherent stories (Jason Zingale loved “Once Upon a Time in Mexico,” but I couldn’t make head or tail out of it). Still, as in the original “Spy Kids” and his “Planet Terror” segment of “Grindhouse,” things can come together — assuming he doesn’t let Hill or that scamp De Niro camp it up too much.

If you’ve never seen the “Machete” trailer, below is your chance. However, due to violence, language, and the appearance of six nipples, only two of which belong to Danny Trejo, this would qualify as NSFW…and it’s Rated X!

  

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