Hell’s Kitchen: no respect, no dice

Last week, we left off on FOX’s “Hell’s Kitchen” with Chef Joseph challenging Gordon Ramsay to “step outside” because he “ain’t no bitch.” Nobody had been eliminated up until this point, so would Ramsay send the guy home, would he beat the crap out of him first, or would he just appreciate Joseph’s fire and let him back in line. Well, security guys surrounded both of them, ready to reduce Joseph to a fine pulp if need be, and Ramsay didn’t back down. Of course, you don’t have to back down when you have 1000 pounds of dude protecting you. But after calling Joseph a “chippy idiot,” Ramsay told him, “You have no respect…so get out!” Joseph shouted expletives on his way out and all of the other contestants were left with their mouths wide open. Of course, we still think the producers planted this guy, but we’ll never know that for sure.

Anyway, the red team had already nominated Lovely and Tennille, while the blue team nominated Tony and Andy. Ramsay chose Tony to go home, because the dude just consistently screwed up last week’s dinner service. That left the blue team two men down, and so Ramsay sent Robert back to the blue team, making it men vs. women again.

After everyone talked about chef Joseph for a while, they went to bed but were woken up by fire alarms at 2am. There wasn’t a real emergency, but this was a fire drill set up by Ramsay, and a challenge to test the teamwork of the blue and red teams. Each team would have to cook a simple meal for hungry firefighters, which consisted of garlic bread, spaghetti and meatballs, and chicken fettucine. Lovely, who gave us the gem last week of “My body was craving hydration,” gave us another one when she said, “This early morning thing is not working for me.” Nice, real nice.

Anyway, Andy got off to a bad start, forgetting to turn his oven on, and then taking forever to make garlic bread. Lovely was having the same problem, but Ariel stepped in and helped her, as most of the blue team did for Andy. Pasta was flying out of both kitchens, but things stalled when Tek served a pink meatball. Still, the guys couldn’t keep up and the red team won by a slim margin. Their prize? A day at the spa, while the guys had to clean a fire truck, and then clean the kitchen. But meanwhile, Dave hurt his wrist cleaning the truck, and Kevin rolled not one, but both of his ankles when climbing the steps back in to Hell’s Kitchen. Are you kidding me? It seems like someone gets hurt every season like this with freak accidents. But these were real injuries, with Dave having a torn ligament and slight fracture, and Kevin having a stretched ligament and sprain. Ouch. But both of them decided they could hang in there and work, so they did.

At dinner service, Ramsay told the teams they would each have one representative waiting tables for the evening, and Dave stepped right up and offered to do that for the blue team because he knew he’d have trouble keeping up in the kitchen. Ramsay chose Lovely for the red team.

During the service, Robert referred to Van as a “pit bull on a chain,” and Ramsay even told Van to shut the hell up at one point. But he also created an awesome risotto according to chef Ramsay, prompting us all to wonder if this guy is for real too, or if the producers planted him.
Tennille, despite Suzanne telling her not to, cooked scallops in about an inch of oil, and Ramsay called her out for scallops that were “swimming in grease.” Robert couldn’t get his scallops right either, and when he asked Andy to help, Andy made matters worse by crowding them in a pan and “steaming” the scallops, but Ramsay blamed Robert. Lovely, meanwhile, took 40 minutes to take an order, getting sidetracked when JP asked her to get a bottle of wine from the cellar.

Amanda was having trouble with basic math, and Robert forgot to fire up some salmon. Ultimately, with the blue team having a huge lead, the salmon let the red team catch up and finish the service first. But…the customer comment cards would decide the winning team. The red team had 81% calling the meal above average, but the blue team had 83%, giving them the victory. Ramsay called Ariel the best of the worst (and she suddenly has emerged as an early favorite), and asked her to nominate two teammates for elimination. After deliberating in her own mind, Ariel let Amanda slide and chose Tennille and Lovely.

Remember, these were the same two on the chopping block at the start of the show, and Ramsay even commented that he didn’t think either of them would win this thing. But after having them each state their case, he said, “Lovely, back in line,” and then said to Tennille, “Wake up…now get back in line.” So that was it…..neither was eliminated, and Ramsay said that they could both thank Joseph, whose exit left him the option to not eliminate anyone this time around. But then Ramsay, ever the jokester, added, “I have something to say to you all……I’m nobody’s bitch!” Everyone laughed, and Lovely and Tennille knew they had dodged a bullet.

So it’s early, but look for Tennille, Lovely, and Andy to have exits very soon. Meanwhile, the preview showed that Dave may have to leave the show because of his injury, and Kevin also was having more trouble. Well, this wouldn’t be Hell’s Kitchen without drama, would it?

See you all next week, and remember to leave your comments below!

  

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