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She’s definitely maybe ready to say “I do” again, perhaps

Are you ready for wedding bells? Well if not, then Pamela Anderson just might be ready to go down that aisle a third time. She reportedly got a marriage license Saturday in Las Vegas. Who’s the lucky guy? Hey, it’s none other than Rick Salomon. Wait, what did he do? Oh that’s right, he was the other half in Paris Hilton’s sex tape and was also briefly married to Shannen Doherty. Is going from either of those to someone who caught Hep-C from Tomme Lee a move up or down the ladder? Perhaps Rick can at least help Pam choose yet another cup size for their wedding day, if nothing else.

You can follow us on Twitter @moviebuffs and on Facebook as well.

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Tschochkes gone wrong: if you want to curry favor with film critics…

…send them booze. If you can’t send them booze, then for God’s sake, don’t send them something like this.

Heartbreak Kid Pillow

This arrived at my doorstep yesterday, and my first thought was: are you kidding me? Who on earth wants a pillow featuring Ben Stiller’s likeness, with the possible exception of his mother? I already had a bad, bad feeling about “The Heartbreak Kid,” and it was confirmed when one of our stringers covered the press round table discussion earlier this week (which Ben Stiller did not attend), and informed us that the movie was, well, awful.

I’m not sure whether to put this up for sale on eBay or throw it away. Or set it on fire. Any suggestions?

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Uwe Boll to make film on nonexistent game

When director Uwe Boll isn’t making crappy movies modeled after famous video games, he’s wanting to make movies based on games that aren’t even created yet. Yep, Boll is already trying to get some sort of film rights to 1988 Games’ Wii title “Zombie Massacre.” But let the man himself tell you all about it:

“I want to make this movie more creepy than ‘House of the Dead, ‘which was intended to be funny and campy,” said Boll. “I’d like ‘Zombie Massacre’ to be a harsh zombie movie like ’28 Days Later.’”

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Quicktake review: “Dirty Sexy Money”

I caught the pilot of “Dirty Sexy Money” and I really enjoyed it. Peter Krause (“Six Feet Under”) has an intrinsic watchability about him and he’s proven he can be the centerpiece for a compelling series. He plays Nick George, a lawyer who unwillingly replaces his deceased father as the legal counsel for the super-rich Darling family in New York City. Nick grew up with the family, so he has history with each and every member of the family. The show is quite funny, but there is an underlying darkness to it (which is readily apparent by the end of the pilot) that gives it a certain depth. With so much history and so many secrets, the writers have a lot to work with, so I think the show has loads of potential.

For those that missed the pilot, ABC.com is streaming at their website.

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Get ready to go “Cruising” again

If you’re a fan of Al Pacino’s, and by that I mean “fanatical” about Al Pacino, then perhaps you recall the 1980 movie he starred in called “Cruising” which featured Al as a straight undercover cop posing as a gay man trying to solve a string of homosexual murders. If not, then get ready to check it out as the film has been reissued on DVD. At the time, the movie flopped, was met with critical backlash by the gay community (which was the opposite of what director William Friedkin had intended), including portests and rock throwing in the streets of New York City while the film was being shot. To this day, Pacino still isn’t sure about his character’s outcome at the end of the film, and Friedkin seems to dig that fact.

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The Office: “Fun Run”

Well, the big cliffhanger at the end of last season was Pam and Jim finally going on their first date, and although they tried to hide it for a while, they are in fact a very happy couple. The scene where the mockumentors showed them the footage of their kiss was a pretty funny way for them to tell the world.

(I do find it strange that Karen left without a whisper. It didn’t seem like a fitting way for such a good character to leave the show.)

Anyway, as is oftentimes the case when unrequited television love is finally requited, the worry is that the show will lose it’s umph. There is certainly a noticeable lack of romantic tension, but I think viewers will be in a honeymoon haze for a while before it’s missed. The show has enough humor and such a great ensemble cast that the writers still have a lot to work with.

In fact, a little of that romantic tension has been taken on by Dwight and Angela, who are going through some serious issues because he decided to euthanize her sickly cat, Sprinkles. This promises to be the “will they/won’t they” relationship, at least in the short term.

This hour-long episode also dealt with Michael’s guilt over hitting Meredith with his car and the resulting Rabies Awareness Fun Run. Sorry, but I didn’t feel like writing down the entire name of the race. I did, however, jot down several of my favorite moments of the episode:

Michael: “I took her to the hospital. And the doctors tried to save her life. They did the best that they could…and she is going to be OK.”
Stanley: “What is wrong with you? Why did you have to phrase it like that?

Dwight’s face when Angela was giving him instructions for how to take care of Sprinkles, including the application of fungal cream at the “base of her tail.”

Stanley: “You can’t be serious. You ran a woman over this morning.”
Michael: “Everyone inside the car was fine, Stanley!”

Kevin clapping (all by himself) for the nurse who reattached the IV in Meredith’s arm after Michael’s balloons unhooked it.

Kevin trying to hit Meredith’s fist when the gang said goodbye.

Angela: (crying because her cat died) “I thought she had more time.”
Dwight: “Nope.”
Angela: “Did she…when you saw her, how was she looking?”
Dwight: “Really dead. Like a dead cat. So…”

Dwight: “Cats do not provide milk. Or wool or meat.”

Micheal: “Is there a God? If not, what are all these churches for?”

Michael’s speech about “oldentimes.”

Dwight: “Wait, this money is going for bat birth control, right? That’s what you told me when I contributed.”

Pam: “’5K’ is for five kilometers, not five thousand miles.”

Darrell feeding a squirrel a peanut.

Angela: “Cat heaven is a beautiful place, but you don’t get there if you’re euthanized.”
Dwight: “I know a great taxidermist. I’ll pay to have her stuffed. Well, he’s not great, but he’s pretty good.”

What did you think of the premiere? Now that Jim and Pam are a couple, is it going to hold up?

One suggestion to the writers – we need to see more of Ryan.

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Kitchen Nightmares: Martin Meets His Match

Last night’s “Kitchen Nightmares” featured a quasi-Indian restaurant in New York City called Dillon’s. It appeared to be in the theater district in New York but it was kind of hard to tell. You could already tell when Gordon Ramsey first appeared at the restaurant, that the problem was that there were literally too many cooks in the kitchen. Well, make that managers on the floor. Along with Mohammod, the owner, there was Andrew the operations manager, Martin the general manager, and Khan the floor manager. And the menu was not just Indian, but also had American food items.

Ramsey ordered a few things from the menu to sample what they had, and was extremely disappointed. Not only were there flies buzzing around everywhere, but the food did not come out as he had asked….vegetarian fritters had meat in the them and lamb was served in place of beef in another. Then the salmon came out and Ramsey said it looked like a “doormat.” When Andrew emerged from the kitchen and Ramsey found out he had cooked the salmon, he asked Andrew to eat it.

At the dinner service, things went horribly wrong because the kitchen was in complete chaos. Martin showed that he had no business being the GM of a restaurant like this, because he was busy on his phone, having waitresses stroke his hair and ego, and just was plain old useless. Orders were taking way too long to be filled, and customers started leaving.

So Ramsey’s first order of business was to go into the kitchen and see how sanitary or unsanitary everything was. And his nightmares were realized….not only was there moldy food everywhere, but there were flies, cockroaches and rats in the kitchen. So he had steam cleaners come in and disinfect the whole restaurant. He even took the staff to his own restaurant a few blocks away to show them how a real kitchen should look.

After this, Ramsey brought in Vikas, a chef consultant, who revamped the menu to be “contemporary Indian cuisine.” They also changed the name to “Purnina” and got rid of the electronic billboard outside the restaurant. Ramsey also brought in a design team to revamp the interior and exterior of the restaurant, and then asked for everyone’s complete support and approval. He got it from everyone but Martin, who seemed to think his shit didn’t stink. Not only that, but waitress Jenna came to his defense as well. Finally, Martin also relented that he would do his part to make the restaurant successful.

So at the dinner service, everything started off well, but it was clear that Martin was in over his head. Food was getting cold before it made it to tables, and Martin was his usual lazy self. Ramsey put Khan in charge, and afterward had a heart to heart with Mohammod, suggesting he fire Martin and replace him with Vikas in the kitchen. Before Mohammod could do this, though, Martin had overheard Ramsey’s suggestions and got into a shouting match with him. He wasn’t fired in the end, because he decided to quit, saying bad things about Ramsey as he exited.

Months later, they showed that the changes stuck, and that Purnina had become very successful, even generating a buzz in Manhattan’s restaurant community. Once again, Gordon Ramsey had swooped in and turned a restaurant around, giving life where it once was floundering. Ah, a feel good story if there ever was one.

I only wonder what became of Martin…..

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Are you a fan of The Muppets…?

Then you’ll appreciate this:

What’s the matter? Doesn’t the name Jerry Juhl mean anything to you? If it doesn’t, then the only excuse that we’ll accept is that you just enjoy The Muppets so damned much that you can’t even take your eyes off them long enough to read the credits, because Mr. Juhl wrote a veritable ton of material for “Sesame Street,” “The Muppet Show,” “Fraggle Rock,” and any number of Muppet movies over the years. (He also wrote “Emmet Otter’s Jug-Band Christmas,” an achievement which has, in and of itself, been known to earn him more street cred than all of his other credits combined.)

Here’s one of his classic sketches from “Sesame Street”:

Unfortunately, Mr. Juhl died in 2005 as a result of complications from pancreatic cancer. In fact, he died 2 years ago today. Rather than grow all melancholy at the thought of his passing, however, his widow – Susan Juhl – has deemed it far more appropriate for you to go forth and do something silly and dedicate your actions to the memory of Jerry Juhl.

Jerry, I’m led to understand, was a very silly man. He would’ve been honored if you’d remember him in such a manner.

Caveat: if you do something silly unintentionally, then try to backpedal and claim that you were actually “doing it for Jerry Juhl,” you will go straight to Hell.

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“Reaper” talkback

Once you’ve written about the pilot twice, there’s really no need for you to talk about it yourself, wouldn’t you agree? But if you happened to catch the first episode of “Reaper,” I’d be very curious to hear your thoughts and see if you enjoyed it as much as I did…or if you didn’t.

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Journeyman 1.1: Leap Before You Look

It’s of course easy to compare “Journeyman” to “Quantum Leap”, since both have the same apparent basic premise: A man jumping around through his own timeline, aiding those who need his help. Television has changed a lot in the nearly 20 years(!) since Scott Bakula made his first leap back in 1989 as Dr. Sam Beckett, and it’d be unfair to both shows to compare the two outside of the basic premise over the long haul. But for the purposes of discussing “Journeyman’s” pilot episode, it can’t hurt to at least talk about what makes the new show different from the old.

Dan Vasser (Kevin McKidd) is not a scientist; he’s a newspaper journalist. His time traveling escapades here are shrouded in much mystery. Whereas Beckett nabbed his “gig” in the name of science, Vasser isn’t yet quite sure why this is happening to him. Both men have their contact person: Sam had Al (Dean Stockwell), a fellow scientist, and Dan has Livia (Moon Bloodgood), his dead girlfriend. Or is she dead? Seems not. Dan had believed Livia to be dead, thanks to an airplane crash, but she indeed alive and shrouded in mystery. Clearly, “Journeyman” is going for a deeper arc than “Quantum Leap” was allowed.

Read the rest of this entry »

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